People with neurotic personality, in the face of psychological difficulties, will have strong mental anxiety, which will lead to a wrong understanding, mistaking the psychosomatic and physiological changes such as anxiety and discomfort of healthy people as pathological or abnormal. Patients themselves pay great attention to these "pathologies or abnormalities" and try to rule them out. However, the characteristic of these anxieties and discomforts is that the more you pay attention to them and try to eliminate them, the more serious they will become, resulting in a vicious circle of concern and illness, thus aggravating the symptoms. The patient was trapped in a state of mental conflict with symptoms and felt very painful. The stronger the patient's desire to rule out "pathology or abnormality", the more serious the symptoms.
As can be seen from the above, there are two keys to the formation of neuroticism: one is neurotic personality; Second, it is determined by neurotic personality, paying too much attention to perception or trying to eliminate symptoms. The patient's life deviates from the normal track and falls into a vicious circle.
Neuroticism is a personality characteristic with a certain neurotic tone, which can also be understood as a special temperament of neuroticism. Nervousness often has a negative impact on one's career, love, life and interpersonal relationship, and even eventually leads to neurosis or other physical and mental diseases.
Personality characteristics: express one's wishes with rebellious psychology towards society and maliciously explain various social phenomena. Often conflict with others to show their strength. Pursuit of pleasure, lack of self-control, although I know that something is bad, I am easily tempted. If something happens, you will fly into a rage and even resort to violence. Patients with higher education often praise their ideals, deny the real society, and even call for the destruction of the real society by violence for their own ideals.
The key to this symptom lies in self-centeredness, overconfidence, strong vanity, fanaticism and indifference.
General symptoms: lack of rationality and weak sense of responsibility. If you are addicted to waste, you should satisfy your desires even if you borrow money. Ignoring social customs, lacking sympathy and even lying.
Key points of neurosis treatment:
1, pay attention to find out the essence of symptoms.
In the first half of this book, I introduced in detail what kind of disease neuroticism is and how its symptoms appear. Understanding the nature of neuroticism plays an important role in treatment, and even some patients can quickly cure symptoms just by understanding the nature of symptoms. This is because the patient's psychological state of the disease has changed after understanding the essence of the symptoms, so he has such a good effect motivation. After the patient is hospitalized, receiving guidance in a family atmosphere will naturally form this psychological state. Here are some psychotherapy methods.
2. The cultivation of neurotic personality
People's behavior usually affects their character. There is no denying that a certain personality will lead you to do certain things. But only seeing this aspect is a one-sided understanding. Nor can we forget the objective fact that "our actions will shape our character". It is this that is the fundamental reason for the development of neurotic personality.
Except for the time of sleeping, our thinking can be said to be changing all the time and will never stay in the same state. You will understand this if you speculate on your inner world carefully. When we consider a problem, our thinking seems to stay in the same state, which is only a superficial phenomenon. For example, someone started thinking about math problems an hour ago, and there is still no answer. On the surface, he was at the same stage of thinking an hour ago as he is now. In fact, his mental activity lasted for an hour between the first moment and the last. That is, the last moment is the moment after an hour of continuous thinking, which is more different and significantly increased than before. Even the same math problem, people's thinking is only more mature at the last moment. If you want the moment an hour ago to be exactly the same as the moment an hour later, you must write off the duration of an hour's experience, which is actually impossible. Therefore, our experiences are constantly innovating and changing. Our experience yesterday and today is not like grafting bamboo on a tree. But like a snowball, it is small at first, but with the continuous rolling, the content is also increasing, and finally there is more substantive content. Just like a river is made up of countless streams. The flow of people's spiritual life will never stop, but it is constantly expanding and changing. This is the essence of spiritual life.
It should be noted that this change does not happen in rambling fantasy and thinking, but because of practical actions, thinking becomes more practical and profound. It is limited to sitting at the table and thinking hard, which will not play a practical role. Only practical actions can mobilize all human consciousness and penetrate into our lives more deeply than simple thinking. Practical action is the most direct promoter to improve our adaptability to real life. If we gain the confidence we have experienced through practical actions, even if we don't realize this confidence, it will make our character stronger.
The cultivation of personality of neurosis patients must also be achieved through this practical action. However, they generally take an attitude of avoiding pain. What they care about most is to abandon this pain. For example, red-faced patients always want to avoid others, or come up with some cleverness to avoid being discovered by others. If there is unclean terror, I don't want to touch anything else casually, so I keep washing my hands and seek temporary comfort. Other patients don't work because of heavy heart, and don't go out for fear of getting sick. These are all escapes from pain. If they really can't escape, try to be perfunctory. If patients adopt this attitude, they will never get rid of their pain and they will never be able to adapt to real life. Patients can't bear the pain to do what they should do, and they will never get the confidence to adapt to life generated in practical actions.
"Suffer pain and do whatever you want" is a life policy that neurosis patients must adopt morally. People who are afraid of others should endure trembling fears, and people who are red-faced should insist on contacting people in this way. Unclean terror patients are afraid of uncleanness and insist on cleanliness at the same time. Patients with insomnia and terror should also endure the pain of insomnia and insist on doing everything they should do during the day.
In doing so, some people may ask: "Is it true that neurotic patients start their daily lives and their symptoms will be fine?" This kind of question is very biased. To learn to swim, you must jump into the water. If you don't jump into the water, you will never learn to swim. The above question seems to say that people who can't swim in the past will never learn to swim, which of course makes no sense. In fact, even if people can't swim, they can jump into the water first, then float on the water with their hands and feet, and gradually learn to swim. You will never learn to swim unless you jump into the water first. So, jump into the water first anyway. By the same token, neurotic patients can endure pain no matter how painful they are and put themselves into real life. If the patient can't do this by himself, he can also do it under the guidance of others. Patients endure pain while doing what they should do, so that they can gain confidence in the experience unconsciously.
Many patients stubbornly believe that they have neurotic symptoms and can't do any work. However, after the patient is admitted to the hospital, contrary to his own ideas, he can completely engage in the work of distribution, which even surprises the patient himself. With this experience, the patient realized that his symptoms were actually the product of his subjective imagination. If the patient can realize this, it can be said that he has completed the first step of understanding.
The cultivation of neurotic personality cannot completely change personality. The so-called cultivation is to carry forward the advantages of neurotic personality, and being conscientious, practical, diligent and responsible is a human virtue. This virtue must also be carried forward under any circumstances. On the contrary, doing things without thinking and following one's inclinations is doomed to failure.
Patients with neurosis generally have a kind of neurotic care and caution. After guidance, they will easily get on the right track and play a positive role in treatment.
3. Correct understanding of objective things and active obedience.
It is not easy for people to truly understand the objective things that exist in reality objectively and correctly. Because objective reality does not necessarily conform to our subjective wishes and ideals, and sometimes it is even completely counterproductive. So we sometimes look at reality consciously or unconsciously. If we are old, whether we like it or not, we will always be old, with more and more white hair and wrinkles, and our physical strength will gradually run out. This is a fact, which goes against our wishes. Although we are unwilling to admit the facts and try to turn unrealistic ideas into reality, we will eventually experience the pain of disillusionment at some point as time goes by. We should correctly estimate the possible range and make our own efforts towards this range, so as not to cause excessive psychological conflicts. However, neurotic patients are not realistic about the existing facts. They expand their ideals and desires to a completely impossible range, so they feel pain. Take the horror of others as an example. We say that we and each other are people in life. Meeting people will cause mood swings. This is a natural fact, especially when they meet their superiors or the opposite sex, they will feel uneasy or embarrassed, which is very common for ordinary people. We should face up to this fact and conform to nature. Even if we are embarrassed or even distressed, don't resist. In this way, there will be no compulsive thoughts and normal psychology. On the contrary, if you resist this, you can't conform to the facts anyway. If such a mentality is formed, it will deviate from the facts and become more and more absurd.
When we were walking on the road, a car sped past us. At this time, there must be anxious and horrible thoughts that prompt us to avoid it at once. In the process of this psychological activity, we should naturally accept our anxiety and terror, not be ashamed of it, and don't have to deliberately eliminate it, so that our mood will naturally turn to normal, as if we had never experienced anxiety and terror. So there will be no psychological conflict, and the anxiety will disappear when the car passes by, which means that the anxiety at this time is a natural fact. We should accept this fact correctly and naturally without any conflict. Because we adopt the attitude of "disturbing it and doing whatever we want", there will be no coercion. If you take a rebellious attitude towards the facts, you can't adapt to the situation at that time, and you can't do what you should do stably and naturally, which will further increase the neurotic pain.
We may make all kinds of unexpected mistakes or forget something every day. On this occasion, you can blame yourself for carelessness, but neurotic patients will have a sense of failure, and they also think that they should be perfect and should not fail. In this way, the facts run counter to their subjective wishes and will inevitably become an imperfect horror. Some people always want to stay calm when they meet others, and the result becomes the chronic terror of others, while others strive for absolute cleanliness, and the result becomes the unclean terror. An ancient man once said, "I can't help it if birds fly over my head, but I can flatly refuse if birds want to build a nest on my head." Similarly, bad thoughts flashed through my mind, and I couldn't help it, but I could restrain myself from doing bad things. "Some immoral and even criminal ideas sometimes flash in our hearts. I think it's hard for even a saint to live without these ideas forever. Therefore, we must correctly understand the potential evil thoughts and narrow minds in ourselves. These evil thoughts cannot be completely eliminated. If someone wants to eliminate all evil thoughts anyway, it is likely to produce an unhealthy and horrible compulsion. Neurotic patients take a resistant attitude towards this psychological fact, and they must keep their own psychological purity, which will inevitably lead to psychological conflicts. I hope everyone can correctly understand their dark side. If we live with such a modest attitude, we will have lofty morality.
Nervous people don't like their mood swings, hoping to achieve a state of "indifference", that is, they can take it calmly and act as if nothing had happened. This seems to be their ideal mentality. A Stoic philosopher also said: "If we look at our bodies as ordinary as a water tank, then our bodies will not panic if they are broken;" If we treat our beloved wife and son as normal people, even if they die, we will not be sad. " In an attempt to achieve the realm of "indifference" with this rational attitude. It is true that we must admit the objective laws of birth, aging, illness and death. However, people must also admit that even if the water tank is broken, there must be regrets, and there must be sadness when the wife and son die. This feeling of regret and sorrow is beyond the control of truth, which reflects the pure feelings of human nature, and we must reveal it from this natural feeling. It is absurd to try to suppress the natural changes of human feelings with dogma in order to achieve the state of "unmoved", which is the root of compulsive concept.
Objective things are constantly changing, and people's psychology will inevitably fluctuate accordingly. Anyone who wants to stay absolutely still is like standing on a rolling log. If he wants to stay still, he will lose his balance immediately. If we are sitting on a boat, we should shake with the boat, which is why we won't feel the pain of shaking. We should adopt a natural attitude and actively obey objective things.
Neuroticism is distressing. The concept of compulsion is also painful, but we should not avoid these pains, but dare to face the facts and accept them. The pain cannot be alleviated, so it is better to accept it directly. When we wake up from the painful experience, a brand-new road opens before us. In the process of hospitalization, we have done this experiment many times, that is, when patients feel extreme pain and realize that they are really unable to resist this pain, their psychological conflict will be broken. At this time, the patient will feel that the pain will be magically relieved immediately. Only when patients realize that there is no way to escape the pain can they achieve real positive obedience.
4. Attention shift and mood change
We talked about neurotic patients stubbornly focusing on their symptoms, so that they should divert their attention from the symptoms. Some patients swear that they will never think about their symptoms again. In fact, such an idea will strengthen their concern about symptoms. The more they try to distract themselves, the more fixed their attention becomes. We should take a natural attitude towards this. If we have distractions in our minds when studying, we might as well stick to learning with distractions, so that we will unconsciously focus on our studies. On the contrary, if we try to resist and resolutely prevent the emergence of distractions, this is actually to focus on distractions, and we will be more aware of the existence of distractions, which will eventually create more obstacles for learning. Only practical action is the best way to divert attention. When we start to do a job, we will naturally focus on it. However, if you always want to turn your attention to your work from the beginning, the result is often counterproductive.
Our emotions cannot be easily transferred by our own will. If we want to get angry now, we can't get angry easily, but if someone hits us on the head, we will get angry at once. We want to be happy, but we can't be happy at once, but if we make achievements in our studies, we will be happy at once. Nervous people always want to have a happy mood, but in fact it is not always the case. When people struggle to climb mountains and look at the magnificent scenery in front of them, they will feel relaxed and happy. When you finish your day's work and soak your tired body in dry water, you will feel the joy after hard work. Baseball fans are in a good mood as soon as they see the baseball game. People's emotions change with the changes of objective things. It is obviously impossible for some people to think behind closed doors and concentrate on getting relaxed and happy emotions. It is ridiculous that mental patients want to keep a calm mind and a relaxed and happy mood for anything and any occasion. The patient was caught in a maze and could not understand such a simple and unreasonable thing.
We don't live to have a good mood and a happy mood. Schizophrenia patients' mood swings are extremely dull, and they remain carefree and happy, even if something big happens, they are indifferent. A hospital where I worked once caught fire. At that time, those patients were calm, not flustered at all, and no one rushed to escape. These patients have become dull and have no desire to protect themselves. Although neurotic patients want to have a happy mood, they probably don't want to be in this state! The reason why we should have a good mood is because we have a strong desire for upward development. We should give full play to our talents instead of being lazy and idle, just to get a happy mood. We must have a correct understanding of this, otherwise we will definitely put the cart before the horse.
5. Develop an attitude of "conforming to nature"
Once the symptoms of neurosis patients are fixed, it is difficult to eliminate them overnight. Don't! It can even be said that the more you want to remove it, the harder it is to remove it. The more people who suffer from insomnia want to fall asleep, the harder it is for them to fall asleep. The more patients with high heart diaphragm want to escape to a safe place, the more uneasy they are about trivial things. The more you try to keep calm in front of people, the more impatient you will be. In short, the patient wants to get rid of all the symptoms and escape from distress, but the more you work on it, the more serious your inner conflict will be and the more serious your distress will be. Yes, we must observe it carefully. When you have symptoms, you should go with nature. You should think that your symptoms now are nothing special, just an ordinary experience. If you feel fear, you should temporarily maintain the state of fear. If you feel pain, you should endure the pain for a while. In short, you should accept everything you encounter. The ancients said that "being accepted means not being accepted", which means that direct acceptance will become an unacceptable state. People with insomnia should not fall asleep by force, let alone. However, if patients let drowsiness come naturally, they will fall asleep quickly because of their sleep instinct. So are other symptoms. Should be directly involved in fear and pain, willing to maintain the original state,
Never try to escape. However, the attitude of conforming to nature does not mean that you should let yourself go and do nothing about all your activities, but that on the one hand, patients should let their symptoms and bad emotions go, on the other hand, they should try their best to do what they should do.
Self-treatment:
(1) Try not to eat meat or protein extracted from soybeans and fish, and try to eat at home regularly instead of eating out. Avoid eating sweets. It's best to stick to long-distance running, and then slowly develop into sprints and cooperative projects. Work should be planned, be patient and communicate with people around you.
Live a simple life and pay attention to saving money. It is best to change the current living and working environment. Learn a skill again or develop a new hobby. Take the initiative to establish good relations with people around you. Think of others and control your desires. The neurotic * * * features of this paragraph of feature editing:
(1) Too eager to survive.
(2) The internal strength is too strong.
(3) Focus on life safety and pay too much attention to your own experience or discomfort.
(4) Be swayed by considerations of gain and loss, hesitate, and often postpone or avoid making decisions.
(5) I often feel insecure and like to exhaust my mind.
(6) Too sensitive to rejection and criticism.
(7) excessive pursuit of perfection.
(8) Subjectively, it is an objective reality that people's will is the transfer.
Morita therapy is often used to treat. Morita therapy advocates: let nature take its course and do whatever you want. The editing of Morita therapy terms is not only understood with the brain, but also through practical actions. Just think, nothing will happen, you must act, you must constantly make achievements, and you must understand through personal experience.
Let nature take its course, don't care about the emotions and symptoms that appear, and focus on your own purpose to do what you should do. "Deal with anxiety as soon as it comes", "Let emotions go with the flow and still do what you should do". Instead of letting this anxiety dominate the action if there is anxiety.
If you want to calm down a wave with a wave, the wave will die. It means that if you try to calm a wave with waves, there will be more waves, and you will try your best to eliminate the symptoms. In this way, new symptoms will appear one after another, and the last one will be out of control. Don't just think about treating diseases, first of all, be a person who is beneficial to others and treat treating diseases as a trivial matter.
Being natural in appearance and healthy in heart means living like a healthy person in order to make yourself healthy. Nervous people always want to get rid of symptoms (improve their mood) and then return to a healthy life, which will never lead a healthy life. Ignoring emotions, we must first act like a healthy person and let emotions naturally become healthy emotions. There is also this statement in the book "Grass in vain".
The more you want to get rid of terror, the more terrible your terror will become. It's like a person walking in a graveyard in the middle of the night. If you continue to be afraid, some fears are nothing. But because of excessive fear and fright, that kind of terror will be greatly aggravated. Therefore, we should never flinch when we have fear. We would rather have fear.
Action is the standard. Only the action and the result of this action can reflect a person's value. No matter how noble a person is, if he steals from others, he is a thief; On the contrary, even if you think bad things, if you are willing to help others, you will be considered a good person. This is the evaluation of public opinion. This is "thinking is better than doing". In this sense, Morita takes action as the criterion, which is the attitude of life that emotions should be settled and actions should be taken to achieve the set goals.
The heart changes with the environment, and the change is really mysterious.
These are the words of the venerable Mo Panluo. It means that people's mood changes with different situations, and it can even be said that this phenomenon is really mysterious. In Morita therapy, it means "emotions change as easily as the weather;" Don't be pessimistic when you are in a bad mood, don't sit back and relax when things are going well, but focus on action and work hard. "