The rhyming words of ancient poetry were adapted into rap.

Wo Chun, I'm stupid.

Mume smells flowers, I have no culture,

I hate the bottom, I have a low IQ,

If you hear me lying like water, ask me who I am.

Eduardo Chun Lv. A big donkey.

The coast is green, I am a donkey,

The coast is like a dark green. I am a stupid donkey.

It's hard to hug each other and I can't yawn. —— (Li Shangyin)

Feel dizzy, rub your eyes hard. I was so playful last night that I didn't know how much. -(Meng Haoran's "Spring Dawn")

The foam was washed away, the waves were washed away, and the two rows of teeth were sharp. -(Su Wan's Nian Nujiao-Nostalgia at Chibi)

The army stopped, and no one wanted to move. It must be too late to stop and walk. -(Bai Juyi)

My watch is too long, so I have nothing to fool around with. —— (Qu Yuan)

I am a cow here, and you are beautiful there. I miss you every day, so don't regret it. -(Li Chi Ngai)

Play chess at night and at noon, holding the mouse. Who knows that in black and white, every grain is bitter. -(Li Shen)

Poems on Christmas Eve (Thief Edition)

The foot of my bed is shining so brightly,

The thief climbed the wall.

Pick up the mace,

Li Bai fell to the ground.

Say four poems

Today is Thursday,

Li Bai goes to the exam.

I got 44 points,

Go home and watch TV.

Seeing Shaolin Temple,

Want to learn real skills.

Beat it into tomatoes,

And said he was capable.

Quiet night poem

The foot of my bed is shining so brightly,

Li Bai opened the window.

Encountered x-rays,

I lost all my teeth.

Look at Lushan Waterfall

The sun oven produces smoke,

Look at Beijing Roast Duck Restaurant.

The saliva flowed down 3,000 feet,

There was no money when I touched my pocket.

well

I drank too much last night,

Mistaken into the depths of the campus.

Vomiting, vomiting, arousing countless mandarin ducks.

Spring Morning

Don't wash your feet in spring,

Mosquitoes bite everywhere.

Turn over in the middle of the night,

This is a big blow.

Quiet night poem

The foot of my bed is shining with such bright light.

The Li family (Li Bai's family) has the window open.

throw a hand grenade

His house is dead (the mouse is dead).

Huo Ying spoofs.

Today, Mr. Iruka had a Chinese class, and asked everyone to recite "When is the bright moon at the beginning of the water diversion" in turn?

Sasuke: Pinch the ferret to death in the ghost hole! I take my glass from a distance.

JiNing: I don't know what year Zongjia Palace is.

Sakura Woody: (looking at Sasuke silently) I want Sasuke, but I'm afraid I can't stand it. It is too high to be cold.

Lumaru: (Helpless) Dancing with Huoying is like being in a room. ......

Iruka was close to collapse, so I asked the upper hidden ninja to demonstrate, and as a result-

Kakashi: (lazy) I turned the corner and got lost again. There is nothing to say. Late again ......

Kay: (flashing his teeth) What happened to his eyes? ?

3 Endure the excitement, come ——————.

Orochimaru: Ninja lives and dies, and the container is high and low.

Jiraiya: It's hard to find all the information about the past.

The fifth generation: Konoha leaves can last for a long time, and the beauty of thousands of miles.

Good sister

When did that beautiful girl come? I asked my net friend on the plane. I don't know the beauty on the internet. Who is this sister? I want to go home offline, lest I be too far away from home and can't find my name in the distance. Why not make a phone call, take a page and take a photo? I shouldn't feel bad. When did I stop wanting to be together? The moon is full of rain and shine, and there are dinosaurs and frogs on the Internet. This is an old question. I hope I can have a good talk with you.

dried goods

An old monk in the black pine forest,

Invisible in midair;

This is not God's house,

Yan created death, he created life.

Kunpian

A ditch in the black pine forest,

Water flows all year round;

I don't see cattle and sheep grazing,

Only to find the monk washing his hair.

In Chinese class. ...

The teacher said, "Classmate! Who hasn't died since ancient times, you take the next sentence! 」

Poor classmate A, how do you know if you don't study hard at ordinary times?

But also see his unhurried replied:

"Who has no shit in life since ancient times, and whose shit has no paper? 」

There is no trace of classmate A after next semester.

But the next year, the students and teachers met again!

In class, the teacher asked the same question again, "classmate!" " Who hasn't died since ancient times? You take the next sentence! 」

This time, the students are smart ~

He said slowly:

"Life since ancient times who didn't shit, who can shit without paper. If you don't use toilet paper, unless you use your fingers. 」

The teacher was angry after listening, but he couldn't show it. He just coldly asked the students to stand up.

Stop to have sex in LAM Raymond, the canoe has passed Chung Shan Man!

Xiao He just showed his sharp horns when an almond emerged from the wall!

The apes on both sides of the strait are crying, and the shepherd boy points out Xinghua Village!

(This MS does not count as ..............)

Qinyuanchun-Exam:

Examination room scenery, thousands of miles of paper floating, Wan Li eye corner. Looking inside and outside the classroom, the scenery is very good, whispering, very lively, I want to compare with the examiner; If you need to come tomorrow, look at the exam results and congratulate each other. Cherish stereotyped writing and shake your head. Rote memorization is very distressing. A generation of pride, pride of the times, cheating in exams. The past is the past. Count the romantic masters and look at the present.

"Like a Dream" (incorrect test style)

I often remember cheating in exams, and the teacher is extremely beautiful;

Eyes seem to be everywhere, pick up the note on the ground;

Weird, weird, and punished.

As soon as the Chinese teacher turned around, Lu Xun was willing to be a willing cow;

Looking back, the math teacher can ask for six dollars six times;

The English teacher turned around, sorry and added thank you;

When the chemistry teacher turned around, carbon dioxide turned into gasoline;

When the physics teacher turned around, a lever moved the earth;

When the biology teacher looked back, the night clouds were horribly low;

As soon as the geography teacher turns around, he can travel all over the world;

As soon as the history teacher turned around, Qin Shihuang came to put the shot put;

As soon as the PE teacher turned around, Daiyu could also play football.

As soon as the labor teacher turned around, he came to the catwalk with scrap metal;

As soon as the music teacher turned around, an earthquake of magnitude 8 blew up the earth;

As soon as the art teacher turned around, Mona Lisa became romantic.

Part I: Don't cheat in the exam. Be a schoolmate next year.

Bottom line: I'd rather have no personality than fail.

Horizontal batch: I just want to go!

"Sleep in class": Hard head will never arrive, even if your mouth is full of water.

When is the autumn moon in the spring flowers of Young Beauty? How much do you know about the exam? Last night, the classroom was graded again, and the results will be unbearable in the middle of next month. Last time I was particularly nervous today, I just changed the topic. Asking when I can graduate is like a stagnant pool.

The sky is gray and wild, and the hope for this year is too slim. The water is curved, the road is long, and the days without money are too long. The building is tall and busy, and I can't wait to rob the bank at once.

A Tsinghua MM wrote:

Walking at dusk one day, I saw a boy pretending to be cool, vomiting, vomiting, and just wanted to bow his head and hit a tree.

Tsinghua boys follow:

One day, in the depths of self-study, I saw a girl hit a tree, vomited, vomited, and dinosaurs dared to feel good.

Another student posted that:

Recently, I had an adventure at dusk. I saw two people vomiting, pretending to be cool, pretending to be cool, and accidentally bumped into a tree.

The fourth poster:

One day, I was walking around the house when I suddenly saw three people vomiting. Why? why? Just because they are all in Shui Mu.

Another strongman followed:

Wandering around Shui Mu when you have nothing to do, I was shocked to hear that four people hit a tree. I was angry, angry, and punished you for planting trees.

The sixth poster:

Four people planted trees that day, and one supervised. Too cruel, too cruel, too horrible.

Beijing University GG also came to join in the fun:

When I was wandering on the Internet, I suddenly heard someone vomiting, laughing, laughing, and a student from Shui Mu bumped into a tree! ! If you hit a tree, you have to plant it, and the punishment will be repeated. Why not build roads in Peking University?

New "Humble Room Inscription"

If the score is not high, just pass; Knowledge is not deep, and cheating is spiritual.

I am a classroom, and I am the only leisure. Novels spread quickly and magazines are frequently turned over.

Think about playing chess and watching movies. Good at copying homework and hunting for strange news.

Without the noise of books, there is no trouble in learning. This is not a dance floor,

Comparable to the amusement hall, I said to myself, "Mix a diploma!"

(1) The wind blew the trees last night, and I was alone in a tall building. I couldn't stand it. The belt is too wide to shrink, and I can't sleep with laughter. Everyone advised him to spend thousands of Baidu, but looking back, the man was still half jealous. ：

(2): Last night, the west wind couldn't move, so I got lost alone in the tall building. My pockets are empty and my heart is beautiful. I often get drunk and drink for Iraq. I searched him for thousands of Baidu and suddenly found that man was sleeping in the street office. ：

Last night, the wind was really terrible. I went to a tall building alone and almost came to a dead end. * My clothes are getting wider and wider, like a hungry ghost. I'm tired of living for Iraq. * Many people boast thousands of Baidu. Later, it was discovered that the man turned out to be a 250. : (

Last night, I bumped into a tree, and a person fainted and lay on the white road. I really regret losing all my clothes and hats. I'm embarrassed about Iraq. Everyone has been looking for me for thousands of times, and I found that everyone is the same, all poor households.

(5) Last night, heavy snow hit a tree, jumped off a building alone, or made a soft landing. No matter how wide the belt is, it doesn't matter what it is for Iraq. Many people wanted to die, tried and failed, became angry from embarrassment and went to the personnel department. ：

(6) Last night, I found the crooked-neck tree, alone, and I was scared. My clothes should be easy to love, and I want to eat for Egan. People searched for him thousands of times, but I found the man hanging on the tree outside the door.

A new interpretation of ancient poetry (hilarious)

Goose, goose, goose

Your neck sings to the sky in joy.

White feathers float on the green water.

Anthurium dial Shiba Inu

Goose, goose, goose-this sentence means comparing yourself to a bird. Isn't that "I+Bird"? So the goose is the poet's self-feeling;

As for Xiang Tiange, he just wants to be a star again. Alas, it's a pity that the poet was born in the wrong age. Otherwise, he can at least mix a super girl or a super man.

White hair and green water-alas ~ I have been determined to be beautiful since I was a child: people with cream and powder have white skin and grow up to be mistresses. Green water is an ancient name for mistresses;

The red palm clears the waves-well, this sentence is intended to exploit others and mix water with bloody hands, so, ah, this sentence expresses the poet's bad habit of gluttony and laziness.

In Chinese class, learn the ancient poem "Mountain Walk" (Du Mu). The beauty teacher carries out the new curriculum concept and requires students to read and explain poems independently by using the learning method of "autonomy, cooperation and inquiry".

Students read aloud: Hanshan stone path is far away, there are people in Bai Yunsheng; Stop and sit in the maple forest late, and the frost leaves are red in February flowers.

The students understand that there is a mountain called Hanshan in the distance, and the stone road on the mountain is curved and steep. There is a family where Baiyun grows. There is a beautiful MM there. I am not afraid of the steep road, so I drove up the hill to see her. It was getting late, so we stopped and went into the maple grove to have sex. After we finished, the leaves swept away by the autumn wind were all red with mm's blood, which was redder than the flowers in February. ...

Teacher (furious): Stop it! (But then I thought that the new concept emphasized "taking students as the main body", "publicizing students' personality" and "allowing multiple answers", so I smiled reluctantly. How can you say "making love"?

Students' perception: In the poem "People Sit Still and Love the Maple Grove in the Night", "sitting" means "doing" and "sitting and loving" means "making love". This is a love poem. There are two protagonists, one is gg, who has money and a car; A mm, she is very beautiful, even if she lives in the mountains, she is chased, and she is still a virgin, as can be seen from the poem "Red in February". The theme of this poem is to praise the virgin body of beautiful MM. ...

1, two orioles singing green willows,

A line of white deer went west.

2. The window contains autumn snow in Xiling.

Wu Dong capsized.

It rained a lot during Tomb-Sweeping Day.

No one is holding an umbrella on the road.

Excuse me, where is the restaurant?

There is a big restaurant in front.

5. If this relationship is long-term,

It should be the time when two people get married.

6, good rain knows the season,

It's time to get off.