It is normal that children will inevitably encounter setbacks in the process of growing up. Being able to endure and eliminate setbacks and maintain a complete personality and psychological balance is an important symbol of mental health. However, today's children seem to be generally poor in resilience. Maybe many mothers will let us see a typical coquetry case first: 6-year-old Doudou is a bully at home, giving whatever he wants. As long as his wishes are not met at all, he will make a scene and lose his temper. Expert analysis: this is a phenomenon that exists in many only children. Children get too much attention, become self-righteous and have a "self-superiority" mentality. If you are slightly dissatisfied, you will lose your temper or shrink back, and you will not listen to criticism. Children can't even stand praising others. Trainer's suggestion: 1, create more opportunities for children to communicate with their peers. Doudou not only participated in the EQ course, but also let him participate in many EQ activities, creating opportunities for him to communicate with his peers. In peer groups, children often experience some setbacks, such as disagreement and submission to the position of being led, which can prompt him to learn how to get along with others and how to cooperate, and improve his frustration tolerance through constant tempering. 2. Give your child a chance to encounter setbacks. If parents always put their children under their wings to help them block injuries and failures, then he will never learn how to bear the blow alone. Therefore, in early childhood education, parents must restrain the impulse of "trying to help him" a little and give their children an opportunity to understand setbacks. Parents must let their children do what they can. In "Fang Ya Rabbit", Doudou experienced a course of self-management. Self-care ability and self-management ability have been greatly improved. Through the study of emotional management course, Doudou's emotional control ability has also improved, and he can express his frustrated emotions in the right way. ? Let's look at a typical case of retreat: a 5-year-old child retreats whenever he meets some difficulties. In kindergarten, if you don't draw well, you will get angry when you go home; If you can't play games well, you will cry when you go home. Later, I simply didn't want to go to kindergarten. Expert analysis: such children are born a little weak. At this time, parents should never say to their children, "Why are you so stupid? Didn't all the other children have a good time? " Trainer's unique skill: 1. What does failure look like? Many times, it is often not the failure itself that brings the biggest blow to children, but her understanding of failure. There is a lesson called "What is failure like" in the emotional intelligence training camp for fangs children, which will help children have a correct understanding of failure. The key is to let children see that the causes of failure can be changed by themselves. For example, I didn't do well in the exam because I didn't concentrate in class, not because I was dumber than others. 2. Give your child a chance to shine. EQ trainers and parents try to find out what Xiao Tong is good at and encourage her to do it. Having full confidence in a certain field can help children better face setbacks from other aspects. 3. Improve children's self-confidence. Tooth-broken Rabbit, Xiao Tong took the course of Emotional E Paradise, and the previous courses were all self-knowledge courses. Through lively and interesting activities, I conveyed to you "I am unique, I am no more stupid than others", "I insist, I work hard, and the ugly duckling becomes a white swan" and "I don't compare with others, only with my past". This is a great help to Xiao Tong, and his self-confidence has been greatly improved. As the saying goes, "it is better to teach people to fish than to teach them to fish." Since encountering setbacks is a necessary hurdle in life, it is necessary to teach children to learn to accept setbacks. Instead of letting children shelter from the wind and rain all their lives, it is better to let children face the storms in life and create their own life path. Maslow, a famous psychologist, said: "Frustration is not necessarily a bad thing for children, but the key lies in his attitude towards frustration." Therefore, wise parents should educate their children about setbacks from an early age, so that children can "suffer" from childhood.