Fear comes from the unknown, and many times the unknown is just because we are too scared to think. -Ma Boyong "I don't read much, don't lie to me".
Xuanbao gave himself a name, called Small Comb.
On Tuesday night, before going to bed, the little comb was very sad. She said, "Mom, I'm scared." I asked her what she was afraid of. She said she was afraid of physical examination.
I told her that the physical examination was simple, just measuring her height and weight. Small comb said, want a blood test, I'm afraid of a blood test.
A blood test, uh-huh, is just a needle and an ant bite, and it doesn't hurt.
The little comb looked at me sadly, with tears in her eyes and curled her lips and cried: Mom, I'm just afraid.
To tell the truth, the small comb is in good health, so it seldom goes to the hospital. I haven't experienced much about injections and blood tests. I've been there once or twice in my memory, and I've also heard others mention that if I don't obey, I'll let the doctor stick a needle. She didn't cry when she was vaccinated, but the crying environment around her would be contaminated with sadness. ?
? So this time, no matter how I describe the experience, no matter how normal the blood test is, it really doesn't hurt. However, a blood test is a monster in her mind. Will it catch people or eat people or what? I don't know, just a big monster, afraid.
That night, I hugged her, patted her and told her that her mother was not afraid. Fall asleep gradually.
Only when people learn to overcome their fears and face the reality can they grow. -The Shadow Stealer by Mark Levy.
On Wednesday morning, when I woke up, little Qom was lying in bed, unwilling to get up and whining, "Mom, I don't want to go to school for a physical examination."
Being emotional in the morning is the last thing I can stand. When I finished all the words and analyzed the reasons, when the small comb still refused to get up and lie in bed, two choices popped up in my mind: 1. Tell her not to go. She's afraid. 2. Drag it down, fight it, and then drag it to school.
Reason tells me that neither of these two choices is the best choice. They chose two extremes. One positively encourages the growth of the fear monster, and the other negatively inhibits the growth of the fear monster, which may make the fear monster more powerful.
I touched the head of the small comb: if you are afraid to cry, then you can cry. Last time my mother caught a cold and drew blood, she was too scared to look. When you have a blood test today, just give your finger to the doctor and turn your head away. My mother will have a physical examination later. You go to the physical examination first today and come back to share your experience with your mother. You won't be afraid to go next time.
When I stopped saying that I was not afraid of blood test, the small comb didn't contradict the blood test at all; When I said that my mother turned her head in fear after the blood test, she seemed to be trying to be braver than her mother. When I said I wanted her to experience it first and then come back and tell my mother, she thought she was better than me.
Finally, I want to distract her. I told her that at this moment, we should not consider physical examination or blood test. Now let's think about where to play on the weekend, whether to have an ice cream on Saturday or Sunday.
In this way, the frightened little monster was driven away from the small comb's mind. We brush our teeth, wash our faces and eat happily. On the way to kindergarten, we also discussed physical examination and other things. But the small comb is no longer in conflict.
When reason comes into play, you will find that many terrible images are not enough to make people afraid. -Ma Boyong "I don't read much, don't lie to me."
"Mom, I didn't cry. Mom, I didn't even turn my head. " When I came home from work, the little comb couldn't wait to show me her finger for blood test, which was pricked by a needle and left a small scab. Her mouth is crooked, and her face is full of pride, courage and disdain for the success of the blood test challenge.
She experienced it once, and she knew that she probably understood these four words-"nothing more."
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She didn't cry when she was vaccinated before. At that time, she was ignorant and fearless, but now she doesn't cry, which makes me more gratified: if she is afraid, she can face her fear and overcome it. This is a kind of growth for her.
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For us adults, it is also a kind of growth.
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Fear, especially the fear of disturbing our normal life, generally comes from our prediction of future events. Memory is about the past and prediction is about the future, both of which are functions of the prefrontal cortex. Subconsciously, we begin to assess the risk of future events. For example, should I raise my hand to answer this question? Should I ask this boy or girl out? Should I apply for this position? Whenever we secretly conclude that it will do more harm than good, then we won't raise our hands, ask someone out, or fight for that new job. Your inner powerlessness comes from your fear of the world.
As long as anyone does what he is afraid of and keeps doing it until he has a record of success, he can overcome his fear. -Roosevelt's speeches by foreign celebrities
The more questions you ask, the less afraid you will be. Fear comes from the unknown, and many times the unknown is just because we are too scared to think. When reason comes into play, you will find that many terrible images are not enough to make people afraid. -Ma Boyong "I read less, don't lie to me."
Courage is not the absence of fear, but the ability to resist and control fear. -Mark Twain
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Egg at the end of the text: I am a treasure mother who is studying in the job. I was deeply hurt by English on my way to graduate school. I learned from it and decided to start the road of English enlightenment for a 4-year-old doll. In this process, I got to know some English picture books//point reading pens//the sources of early education machines and children's toys. Anyone interested in postgraduate entrance examination or parenting can add me to WeChat (zhongguoxuan20 19)*** to discuss relevant contents. I will have a lot of electronic postgraduate materials to share with my children's learning materials. If there is a treasure mother who wants to do sideline business like me, she can also have a private chat with me.