I also learned a lot from your blog and benefited a lot. I can't help but write you a letter about the cultivation of children's interests. My child is 4 years old and 5 months old. It may also be that there are too many interest classes since childhood (1 year-old started early education, and started various interest classes at the age of 3, such as dance, art, creativity, vocal music, piano and roller skating), resulting in a lack of enthusiasm or even disgust for all interest classes. For example, in the piano class (starting at 4 years and 3 months), I began to look for various reasons as soon as the class started. Sometimes it itches, sometimes it's too hot-I'm tempted and threatened, and sometimes I'm punished. All this is useless. Finally, even the classroom was not allowed. It's stopped now, and I don't know how to proceed. I think music must be adhered to. Even in order to lay the foundation, she bought a full set of CDs of "Everyday Baby Learn Music" on the Internet, and also signed up for vocal lessons and drum lessons to cultivate her sense of music and rhythm. These are all preparations for her to learn piano or violin! So far, she still says that she doesn't like the piano, and I haven't given her a formal piano lesson. I'm really worried about this. I don't know how to start. Now some interest classes have gradually decreased, such as art and creativity. What I want to leave her most is the piano. If she really doesn't want to learn the piano, what do you think of playing the violin? How can I cultivate her interest? Almost four and a half years old, a little anxious! Looking forward to hearing from you! Thank you. I am no stranger to the state described in this letter. There are many similar situations in life. According to my observation, such children often appear in families with good economic conditions and intellectual parents. These parents attach great importance to education and are willing to invest in their children's education. However, after spending a lot of time and money, there are still quite a few unsatisfactory results. Why? Simply put, this situation is caused by parents' excessive utilitarianism and anxiety. In the process of children's growth, parents are eager to achieve their goals instead of trying to enjoy the process. On the way, I only stared at and looked forward to the destination ahead, ignoring the long journey. What is more important is actually the process, which is to feel and appreciate the scenery on both sides. For a child, what is most needed is not all kinds of interest classes, but the companionship, interaction, relaxed play and happy mood of parents. Interest is unconsciously established in the daily atmosphere, not cultivated in a complete training class. If the training class is purposeful, when children evaluate, test and demonstrate by learning or understanding a certain goal, they will feel more pressure instead of fun. The attitude that the children showed later in the interest class was a rebound and resistance to this pressure instinct. Children's growth needs to be left blank. A painting, if the whole paper is full, is definitely a failure. Good works of art pay attention to blank space in composition. The same is true of children's growth. A child, big or small, needs her independent space and time within a safe range. It is precious time to leave children alone, talk to themselves, play with their favorite toys and concentrate on observing something. If the child's time is full, the child has neither time to recall and ruminate on the information she received, nor time and space to think. Where do they have the leisure to choose freely and devote themselves to their own preferences? If everything is arranged by the mother, the child is a passive performer and has to be tested by his parents from time to time. Isn't it normal for children to be disgusted? A good friend of mine said that children's interests should be cultivated in natural daily life, and I feel the same way. To be a mother, we must first let our children fully feel and love life. Children who are physically and mentally happy in daily life and are appreciated and affirmed by their parents can have enthusiasm and have a strong curiosity about more things. If a child is as busy as a bee in all kinds of early education training, it is like a seedling rooted in barren land, facing high-fertilizer irrigation beyond its absorption capacity. In order to make it grow taller and stronger, farmers desperately applied high-concentration fertilizers, and the seedlings were burned to death by high fertilizers. Therefore, experienced farmers will not only cultivate the soil before farming, but also pay attention to the concentration of fertilizer when applying fertilizer to avoid burning seedlings. We might as well ask ourselves quietly, what kind of farmer are you? In my opinion, what this mother has to do at this time is neither to buy CDs nor to enroll in classes, but to reorganize and reflect on her educational philosophy. Is it possible to have less purpose, relax first and enjoy more relaxed and happy parent-child time with children? Less utilitarian, less eager for success, less competition, less performance, less running around between classes and less asking children. Do you like this? Will it? Can you do it? When parents set up an experience channel of "like = learning, interest = mastering hard, interest class = being persecuted and punished" for their children, it is when the children feel pressure and shake their heads and say that they don't like anything. Only when the child equates love with the experience of sincere pleasure and inner satisfaction can you hardly ask her not to like it. Why not try to relax your life? For example, music edification is not only carried out in the teacher's training class. You let the child sit on the ground and play with her favorite toys, without disturbing her, and put some soothing background music next to it; At dinner time, the family sat around for dinner, played some light music and some children's songs, clapping their hands, lifting their arms and kicking their legs with the music, all of which were influenced by the music. Friends who are familiar with me know that I firmly support early education. But at the same time, I also oppose the utilitarian early education, and I can't wait to achieve my goal. What I advocate is the natural and subtle early education that integrates learning into life. In this early education process, the mother's active investment is used to drive and influence her son, attract him to take the initiative to participate in learning and enjoy this pleasant parent-child interaction process. The kind of early education that allows children to obey the arrangement and command of adults, parents appear as escorts, bystanders and inspectors, and entrust education to profit-making organizations of businessmen, bringing superficial experience and pleasure to children. If you add the test of parents and grandparents after returning home, the final result is likely to be counterproductive. Are children willing to participate actively or have to accept passively? The experience this brings to children is completely different. Many times, we often ignore this most critical link. Writing here, I thought of climbing the mountain. At present, some famous scenic spots have built cable car passages for tourists to reach the peak as soon as possible and conveniently. Visitors can easily realize that "once you climb to the top of the mountain, you will see that all the other mountains look short under the sky." Spend some money on the cable car. Now there are many similar "cable car classes" in education, telling parents that as long as they take their fast cable car, they will soon send their children to the peak. Imagine that children stand on the top of the mountain overlooking the mountains early, and parents are happy to pay for tickets. But it's a pity that children's growth and learning are different from traveling and mountaineering, and they have to go step by step.