Goldbach conjecture is one of the three major mathematical conjectures in the world, which was put forward by the German mathematician Goldbach in a letter to the famous mathematician Euler in 1742. Goldbach's conjecture has not been completely solved so far, and the best achievement at present is obtained by China mathematician Chen Jingrun in 1966. Of course, people who can answer this world problem have extraordinary knowledge and ability, but is it better to ask this problem that can't be solved for three and a half centuries?

The ability to ask a good question is not only used in exams and studies, but also in the workplace and life. It is no exaggeration to say that the ability to ask questions is one of the cornerstones for people to survive in society. People who have the ability to ask questions and strangers who meet for the first time can discuss a topic in depth and guide each other to tell their professional knowledge, which is the basis for determining whether life is rich or not.

How to Ask Questions Effectively is a book that introduces the methods of asking questions. Author Takashi Saito, 1960 was born in Shizuoka prefecture. He graduated from the Faculty of Law of the University of Tokyo and completed his doctoral program in the Department of Pedagogy Studies of the Graduate School of the University. Now he is a professor in the literature department of Meiji University, majoring in pedagogy, body theory and communication theory. Takashi Saito is also a Japanese best-selling author. He has a lot of experience in learning methods, reading methods, communication methods, etc., and has rich writings, mainly library series and knowledge new book series.

According to the questioning methods and skills practiced in the teaching process, Takashi Saito summed up "How to ask effective questions", with the goal of asking good questions, teaching the standards of good questions, and acquiring the questioning skills of in-depth communication. Takashi Saito believes that questioning ability is a more active way of communication. First of all, the book outlines the importance of questioning ability and the methods of training questioning ability in daily conversation. Then it introduces the thinking of asking questions, what kind of questions are good, and Takashi Saito gives three important coordinate axis models to judge whether a good question is a bad one. Next, combining questioning and communication, I summarized a lot of questioning and communication skills, which is the focus of this book. Combined with abundant interview case analysis, this paper introduces the skills of echoing, changing the subject and learning from each other from the simple to the deep. A large number of high-quality dialogues are the characteristics of how to ask questions effectively. Takashi Saito hopes to teach readers the ability to ask wonderful questions in this way, so as to see a different world from the perspective of others and enrich their self-knowledge.

1. Why do you need to practice your questioning ability?

The ability to have an effective conversation with a person is not high. Only by having high-quality conversations with people of different ages, from old people to children, can we gain other people's experience and see the world through other people's perspectives. This is the representative of high skills.

In the workplace, whether attending large-scale meetings, training in small companies, leadership talks or interviews with 1V 1, when one party mainly expounds his own situation, views or ideas, there is often an important link, that is, the questioning session, which is an important opportunity to ask high-quality and high-level questions, on the one hand, to answer his own doubts, and on the other. In the year of graduation, I attended a recruitment presentation in Wanda. In the questioning session, a girl put forward her own ideas and questions about a certain point of Wanda's speech, which won the speaker's favor on the spot and immediately gave her an interview. Not only in the workplace, but also in love, family and social occasions, the questions raised often determine the direction of communication. A good question can help us to get closer to the communicator quickly.

2. What kind of questions are good questions?

Takashi Saito provided three coordinate axis tools to evaluate and classify the problems from three dimensions: the problems themselves, the wishes of the communicating parties and whether they conform to each other's experience, so as to screen out good problems.

From the point of view of the problem itself, Takashi Saito thinks it is necessary to establish a specific and essential problem consciousness. For example, when asking questions related to the meaning of existence, the specific and essential way of asking questions is "Where are you now?" The abstract and essential question is "What is the meaning of living?" The latter method is often difficult for the person being asked to answer. If you ask this question to a stranger in the street, it is estimated that it will be considered as "this person is sick", and only with specific and essential questions can you get a better answer. As for non-essential questions, such as asking some professional players about their horoscope and gossip, they are non-essential questions.

From the perspective of communication willingness, before asking questions, we should first speculate on the other person's situation, interests and concerns, and try to ask what we want to ask and what the other person wants to say. Timing is also important. If the other person has to go over and ask someone a question that 1 hour can't solve, the other person will definitely not give you a good look. Of course, ask questions you don't want to ask each other. This part of the field often belongs to the compliment field of adults. For the left half of the field that the other party doesn't want to talk about, I want to ask what the other party doesn't want to talk about, which is often a child's problem. I don't want to ask each other or say anything, just ask casually.

The third dimension is the intersection of the present and the past, so we should try our best to choose questions that conform to the present context or the other party's experience. It is also good to ask questions in the second quadrant or the fourth quadrant that can conform to the current context or past experience, but if the two situations are inconsistent, for example, asking a question about "satellite navigation" will make people feel quite abrupt and communication will basically stop immediately.

3. Questioning skills combined with communication.

The ultimate goal of asking questions is communication, and communication is the connection. It is the ultimate goal to ask different questions in different communication processes and finally get happy and worry-free communication with each other. For example, in the example cited by Utoda in How to Ask Effective Questions, two people who meet for the first time can talk about life and death, because on this basis, two people talk about their own selves, the influence of loneliness on creation and so on. And after communicating with each other, we deepened our understanding and talked about the theme of death step by step. Otherwise, if the theme of death is brought out at once, it will only make the dialogue atmosphere heavy.

Takashi Saito gave several questioning skills for in-depth communication. Only by echoing, asking questions about changes, consulting the information of the asked area and giving a concrete example can we succeed. We also analyzed the skills used in high-quality dialogues or interviews, and showed the readers the application of questioning skills in detail.

echo

? Simple echo can be expressed by appropriate "nodding", repeating what the other party said, "in other words" or "quoting" and other techniques. The deeper "echo skill" is to "echo and dig deep" according to the other party's content, that is, to find a lot of key points and keywords in the other party's conversation and find the same topic as other topics at the right time. In this way, we can

Ask questions about changes.

? Asking about changes is also a clever questioning skill. Similar to "what makes you like this now, because of this change" rather than "what kind of person are you now", it is easier for the interviewee to remind him of his past experience and usually tell important events that have a great influence on him.

Please refer to the information in the question area.

Specialized and necessary questions and ordinary and necessary questions are good questions. For non-essential but professional questions, it is the kind of trade secrets, which is not the concern of the questioner. However, it is not easy to be essential and professional, especially when we are dealing with an expert. Questioners need to have enough knowledge of the professional field and work hard in the field to be asked. Only by doing serious homework in advance, grasping the key points and grasping the theme to deal with the interviewees can we get a deeper discussion.

Give a concrete example.

When the interviewee expresses his abstract ideas, asking questions such as "Say it in a more understandable way" or "Please give an example" will help both parties to reach an understanding or communication. In this way, concrete and abstract topics can be kept in communication, and both sides can understand each other, which is profound.

Encourage each other to succeed.

Finally, Takashi Saito emphasized that the basis of dialogue and communication is the interaction between the two sides, and the ultimate goal is to inspire each other, deepen mutual understanding and maintain a mutually beneficial relationship. People who only care about talking to themselves will only leave the impression of talking to themselves. Only by keeping in mind the people in the conversation at all times and adjusting their dialogue strategies according to the responses of the interviewees can we get empathy and satisfactory dialogue.

The best way to grow up is to talk to excellent people often and gain each other's experience and knowledge through conversation. Asking questions is the key to understanding the other person's point of view and opening the other person's chatterbox. By using "how to ask effective questions" and "axis thinking method", we will always maintain the "concrete and essential" questioning consciousness in our daily life and constantly practice the questioning skills mentioned in "How to ask effective questions". In the long run, we can ask high-quality questions and grasp the essence of the conversation. Using this ability in important meetings, interviews or blind date occasions and asking wonderful questions will make unfamiliar people open their hearts and create a pleasant conversation atmosphere, which will help us to increase our knowledge, be more confident and get a more exciting life!