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Notes on Parenting Choice (1)
This book mainly answers 13 parenting puzzles. In fact, it also expresses the author's scientific concept of parenting, and many viewpoints in the book are quite agreed.

1, about children's sense of security

The sense of security comes from the trust of the mother, and the positive and stable response of the mother (the main caregiver) is conducive to the baby to establish a safe attachment.

Hugs and the comfort and emotional support brought by hugs are the basis for babies and mothers to establish attachment.

The establishment of baby's sense of security needs a gradual process.

Babies should meet their needs in a timely and appropriate manner. The baby should know the relationship between himself and his mother through his fast, stable and repetitive behavior, establish a safe attachment to his mother, and then establish a sense of trust and security to the outside world.

The solution to "clingy" is to take the initiative to accompany. Only when the baby thinks that we can be trusted, we will always be there when they need us. Only when we leave, will they feel at ease and be more willing to explore the world and accept challenges.

Affect the baby's emotional expression with positive emotions. The younger the baby, the more patient the mother should be, expressing more positive emotions, support and love, keeping the child in a happy mood and reducing unnecessary crying, which is conducive to the baby's cognition, expression and adjustment of emotions in the future.

Provide a safe and stable exploration environment for children, and the understood baby can gradually establish a sense of security.

2. Is early education necessary? What is good early education?

After reading this chapter, I have a deeper understanding of early education. In fact, early education is to provide various conditions for infants and young children to promote their healthy development, including all-round development in physiology, cognition, socialization and emotion. Why is early education so important? Because the brain develops rapidly in infancy, it solves the plasticity.

Early education is not as early as possible. Children's study period is relatively long, so parents should pay more attention to giving their children love and a stable environment.

The study found that many excellent and happy children spend most of their time doing what they want to do. The goal of early education is balanced development. Parents and families are the main force of early education, and caring is the basis for the good development of babies; The balanced development of infants' various senses can lay a good foundation for them to explore the world development thinking; Baby toys are not expensive, but more importantly, how parents guide them to know the world.

3. Is the sensitive period really everywhere?

The source of sensitive period is critical period, but it is different from critical period. There is no strict boundary definition of sensitive period, so in the actual development process, we can't be "scared" because of the application of sensitive period.

The development of the brain is both sensitive and plastic. It is necessary to break the shackles of the sensitive period, understand the uniqueness and differences of the baby's development, and make the best use of the situation. At the same time, establishing a good parent-child relationship is very important for the development of the brain.

4. Is TV program early education or injury?

Infants' thinking is "intuitive action thinking", and their cognitive characteristics determine that they watch TV programs differently from adults. Piaget called the thinking development of 0-2 years old "the period of sensory movement". In the past two years, babies have mainly carried out concrete and direct thinking in perceptual actions. At this time, watching TV, they see pictures that flash by quickly, but they can't make up a meaningful story; I can't understand the relationship between what happened on the screen and the real world; And watching TV too early is easy to cause attention disorder.

Babies under 2 years old need real interaction with their parents and other caregivers. It is suggested to use multimedia carefully and effectively; Control time, choose appropriate programs, link programs with reading and life, and provide more opportunities for off-screen activities.

In reality, due to the popularity of the Internet and electronic products, more and more children come into contact with this piece earlier or more, which has more or less had some adverse effects. This is a fact. Whether parents have time or should accompany their baby to study, play or explore with high quality; If the old people have more company, you can also bring them into contact with nature.

5. Will rules destroy children's own nature?

Reading this chapter is the most touching and rewarding section in this book at present. At present, love and freedom education schools are very popular. Is it true that advocating love and freedom has no boundaries and constraints? Actually, it is not.

For babies aged 0-3, rules mean establishing regular life and habits. Rules let children know the boundaries of safety, let children learn social rules and let children establish study habits. In the process of establishing rules, we should follow the rules of children's physical and mental development and characteristics, and will not suppress nature. Encourage children's freedom of thought, formulate specific rules in the process, and solve problems by children's understanding and acceptance.

Regarding the implementation of the rules, many parents agree with the "gentle and persistent" approach. But this is not the gentle and rigid execution on the surface. The author's understanding of gentleness does not mean tone and superficial gentleness, but wins children's cooperation with love and understanding from their feelings. The so-called persistence is not to give up every inch of land, but to keep the bottom line, not to cross the line, and to be flexible within the bottom line.