Everyone is eager to be recognized and appreciated, which is a deep psychological need of human beings. The psychological effect of identification refers to people's emotional and cognitive identification with the meaning of the event, which obviously affects their evaluation, attitude and behavior towards the event, that is, psychological identification affects people's attitude and behavior towards things. In children, this psychological effect is obvious. For example, if the mother asks the child some questions and asks the child to make some suggestions, if the child thinks that the mother values herself before asking him to answer questions and express his opinions, then he will cooperate with her in a positive attitude; If children think that their mother is embarrassing themselves and wants to make a fool of herself, they will treat their mother's questions with a negative attitude. The existence of children's identity psychology is often the practical reason why parents are "thankless" in the process of education. In fact, mothers often think that this is good for their children, but in the end they make their children "miserable." This makes the mother and child do not understand each other, which leads to the contradiction between parents and children. If the child reaches psychological identification with what the mother teaches and the mother's reaction to the child reaches psychological identification, there will be no situation that backfires. The psychological function of identity reminds mothers that if they want to influence their children in thought or behavior, they must first obtain their psychological identity. This requires you to take the initiative and identify with the child first. Let the children know that they are affirmed and appreciated, excellent and unique in their mother's mind, so that the children will accept their mother psychologically and be willing to accept her education and guidance. In this world, there is no absolute self-confidence, everyone has inferiority and timidity, but to varying degrees. So are children. Almost all "problem children" are losers under normal order. They can only seek affirmation and self-worth from others, and their parents are the primary candidates for their affirmation and recognition. When children find that they can't get their parents' approval, their self-confidence and enterprising spirit will be hit hard. At the same time, it is difficult for them to accept criticism and education from their parents. Actually, recognition is mutual. If you are careful, you will find that children who are approved by their parents usually agree with and like their parents. And those children who are "bad" and "useless" in the eyes of their parents usually resent their parents and oppose them. Therefore, when you find that your child is biased against you, please reflect on yourself first, see what you have done wrong, and strive to gain a sense of identity from your child, so that you will be accepted and recognized by your child, and your child will be willing to accept your teaching, and you will maintain a close relationship with your child.