That's because if a person experiences more feelings, his heart will be numb. When facing marriage again, he will use rational eyes to measure whether the other party is suitable or not, and use rational thinking to deal with various emotional contradictions after marriage. It is important to distinguish right from wrong, but if even the husband and wife lack the necessary human touch and win or lose by right or wrong, I can only say that such a marriage cannot last long, and such a husband and wife are doomed to be unable to enter each other's hearts.
What we need to correct is that the number of marriages is not directly related to the happiness of couples. If it is difficult for couples to have a heart-to-heart conversation, how many couples who get married for the first time in real life can be faithful to each other? The most obvious advantage of halfway couples is to face up to their marital responsibilities, not to waste too much energy emotionally, and to value mutual help in life rather than emotional dependence.
On the other hand, isn't the most prosaic marriage a life that is neither salty nor light? It is an indisputable fact that the happiness of married couples is indeed more difficult in reality, and the number of divorced couples after marriage is also increasing year by year. Then we have to think about a problem. What are the important factors that affect the difficulty of heart-to-heart communication between couples? Personally, it is: children.
No matter inside or outside marriage, no one can love a child who is not related to him as much as his own. All stepmother's mutual affection should be given up from the relationship between husband and wife.
The 32-year-old Danny poured out his marriage experience with tears. After listening to this, the internal disputes are extremely huge. I don't know whether I should comfort her or despise her.
If marriage is a turning point for a woman, then I think Dandan's first marriage is the starting point for her to go to the bottom. At first, her ex-husband was just Danny's colleague. After a long time, they gradually developed feelings for each other. Coupled with the cooperation between colleagues, the simple Dandan soon fell in love with the handsome ex-husband. For this relationship, the young and ignorant Dandan was pregnant before marriage.
The two conditions are equal, no! To be precise, they are all equally poor. The former in-laws were conservative and diligent all their lives. Even Dandan thinks that his pregnancy test is a waste of money. Plus Danny always feels that he is in good health. There is no need to waste that money to go to the hospital regularly.
Marriage is the crystallization of love, and marriage is a responsibility. Couples should be more responsible for the next generation, especially for pregnancy tests. Any woman who has common sense and is responsible for her feelings will not take any chances, because it is related to a family. No one should control his inner self-righteousness and gamble with his family.
Sure enough, Dandan's daughter was diagnosed with cerebral palsy at the age of 1.
Originally, the ex-husband's family preferred sons to daughters, and the child's physical health was even worse. Nightmare-like situation caused Dandan to quarrel with her ex-husband, whose family advocated sending the child away and giving up the treatment for the child. However, Dandan has repeatedly insisted that no matter how hard and tired he is, he should treat his children. The child's dispute directly led to the divorce of Dandan and her ex-husband.
Dandan took the only 8,000 yuan at home and left home with his children. In the countryside, divorce is a disgraceful thing. After the divorce, Dandan was rejected by his family. In the face of reality, family members always seem so pale and powerless. Perhaps it is this kind of adversity that makes a divorced woman slowly become strong and independent.
In order to be able to see a doctor for her children, Dandan came to a strange city alone, and she has always been making money. The child enrolled in an early education nursing class, which was very expensive, accounting for almost half of Dandan's monthly salary. It's bitter and wronged, but Dandan often goes home to see his better and better daughter. At that moment, she felt everything was worth doing.
Once in the middle of the night, the child had a high fever of 40 degrees, and it was difficult to take a taxi in a strange place. Finally, Dandan turned to the landlord for help. The landlord is now Dandan's husband. Because of this help, Danny has absolute trust in the person in front of him. The charm of a woman is not reflected in her luxurious appearance, but in her inner integrity and kindness, so that time is embedded in her bones. Dandan, who is self-reliant and self-loving, quickly won the pursuit of the landlord.
A woman is still a woman after all. What woman doesn't want to be a little woman conceived by a man? If life doesn't force them, who will pretend to be strong? Dandan is no exception. Facing the fierce pursuit of the landlord at that time, she certainly couldn't cope with a sincere man who was caring and attentive to you.
At the end of last year, Dandan married her current husband, both of whom were married for the second time, which was considered as a couple halfway.
I thought this love was the starting point of a happy marriage, but they didn't understand that the contradiction between husband and wife was coming quietly. A few days ago, Dandan's niece went to the hospital for routine examination. Her husband and her children lined up together to get medicine. Just when Dandan came back from going to the toilet, her husband had been pushing her child and said some ugly words.
"You are a burden, without you, your mother and I don't know how happy we are, and we have to take care of you every day. Do you have anything to do with me? When you grow up, hurry to find your father. "
Without blood relationship and emotional foundation, I think my husband's behavior is a bit excessive, but not extreme. This is the weakness of half-way couples, and it is difficult for either party to accept the other's children from the heart. This is a problem that all couples should consider except emotional factors. If you don't think well, the consequences are self-evident.
When Danny heard her husband's words, he turned and walked away with the child in his arms. When I got home, my nose was not my face. I said directly to my husband, "When you chase me, make out with my children. Now that I am married, my six parents will disown me. I tell you, if you love me, you must take my daughter as your own and take care of her for life. "
The husband was angry and full of grievances. Although he is not like his own child, he is still good as a stepfather. He sees a doctor for his children and is escorted to and from school by his husband. He has nothing to say to Danny. He is consistent before and after marriage, and he is in charge of most of the savings in the family. Because of this, her husband is not bad.
Forget it if Danny doesn't understand. Her husband is not allowed to complain at all. Isn't this a little too high? It is not easy for my own father to do this. Husband and wife should understand each other more, and the husband began to refute.
"Wife, you talk too much. How do I treat your mother and daughter? Outsiders really see it. Besides, he's not mine. Why should I raise him? "
Dandan was speechless. Calm down and think about it. He really went a little too far. What did she do as a wife in this marriage? Marriage is fair. Only when you pay can you gain, and understanding will be respected. The feeling of getting something for nothing is only based on temporary interests, and the long-term truth must be to know each other's inner courtesy.
This is also one of the factors that make it difficult for couples to give up halfway, because only by seeing the true face of marriage can we face the contradictions after marriage more rationally. Don't forget that apart from rational discrimination, husband and wife also need human tolerance and empathy.
Therefore, divorced women must understand that maybe it is not a man but a family that you remarried. If you can accept each other's incomplete past, I think such a couple will be as happy as their first marriage. If we ignore each other's past again and again, all the contradictions in marriage will be shown in the details of life, and only despair will wait for us again.
Dear friends, do you think Dandan's demands in the article are too much? Welcome to discuss.