Human nature is complex and people's hearts are difficult to understand.
It is difficult for us to really understand a person on the surface, but we can see a person's character clearly from the details of life.
Those seemingly inconspicuous actions in a specific situation often best reflect a person's true face.
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When a person is frustrated, his character is the best.
On the internet, there is a hot topic: "How to judge whether a person's character has passed the customs?"
There is a highly praised comment written like this:
"Looking at a person's character depends on his attitude towards others in the worst situation."
The writer Tao Rabbit told a story.
She has a friend who has known her for more than two years and has always been very gentle.
When treated as a joke, I have never seen him and anyone;
Talking to a deaf aunt, he always smiles;
He is very polite to the waiter when eating.
It is simply a model gentleman in a circle of friends.
Until a later party, the boy confessed to the girl he liked in public and was rejected on the spot.
She was chatting with another friend outside when she happened to meet a boy driving out of the garage.
I saw him honking his horn in the distance, and the garage manager's hand was a little slow, so the boys leaned out and swore.
After leaving the garage, the boy drove very fast, and when he passed a small puddle, he splashed mud on passers-by nearby.
It never occurred to her that at this moment, this person with excellent temper and cultivation showed such an unbearable side.
I've met many people. They usually behave well and behave appropriately, but once frustrated, he seems to be suddenly a different person with no education at all.
As Professor Chen Guo of Fudan University said:
"If you can keep an open mind, a self-restraint and a grace when you are most frustrated, down and out, and you can't understand it, that's the real kung fu, depending on your cultivation."
People with really good personality, whether angry or not, can maintain basic literacy and control their temper.
See a person clearly, not by his usual appearance, but by his behavior when he is down and out.
See through a person's moment.
02
Proud posture is the most cultured.
Jackie Chan once reflected on his previous experience in his autobiography.
When he was a stuntman, he followed a great director to visit famous shops in Hong Kong.
Seeing his pitiful appearance, the salesman ignored him and said bluntly, "It's very expensive here. You can't afford it. "
Unexpectedly, in less than a month, he became famous, directly from his childhood body, body double, and became a movie star popular in Asia.
After becoming famous, he remembered this incident and ran to the store with a group of followers, trying to save face for himself.
He found the girl who used to be a shop assistant and said to her, "I want to try everything here."
The girl opened the clothes one by one, and every time he tried them on, he threw them aside like garbage.
After trying many times, he said to the girl, "Take this, don't take this, pack it and send it to my hotel."
The girl collapsed on the spot, and the manager quickly apologized to Jackie Chan.
Jackie Chan said angrily, "I made it very clear. Why didn't she hear you clearly?" I want it here, not there. I hope everything is packed as new. I can't miss a needle. Seal it for me. "
Until now, those shirts are still in the corner of his house, and he has never worn them.
On another occasion, he asked his younger brothers to follow him with 500,000 cash, swaggering out of the watch shop and asking at the door:
"What are the top ten watches? Is this the most expensive? Is it the most diamonds? Ok, come to 7, don't pack, give money! "
He changed his watch every day for the next week.
I also invited friends who used to do martial arts together for dinner. As soon as we met, we deliberately rolled up our sleeves for everyone to see.
During that time, Jackie Chan was glamorous on the surface, but secretly he didn't know how many people he had offended.
There is an old saying: "Heaven is unreasonable and earth is unreasonable. Only by taking everything as a reference can we see our own shortcomings."
The more proud a person is, the more he can see his character and upbringing.
A truly excellent person will never leave an arrogant attitude when he is proud.
On the contrary, the better people are, the more humble and low-key they will be in their words and deeds.
See through a person's moment.
03
The state of being tired is the most obvious pattern.
Alice in Wonderland wrote: "When people are extremely tired, it is easy to put down all defenses and show their true colors."
I don't know if you have found such a phenomenon:
The more tired people are, the easier it is to quarrel with others.
On the way to catch the morning rush hour, we often hear the impatient whistle of the driver;
On the journey of climbing mountains, some people will also complain because their companions are left behind;
At stations and airports, some people will swear at the staff because of the night shift.
When people are extremely tired, it is easy to have behaviors that the brain can't control and make excessive behaviors.
At this time, any small matter may become the fuse of quarrel.
Netizen @ Qi Sheng told a story.
On one occasion, their team took a group of early education directors to training.
The company found a bus, and the time, place and price were all discussed, but at the critical moment, the bus master was late.
Originally, no one said anything.
But the owner's face is full of fatigue and irritability. Being late, the master took it out on the staff and complained from the beginning that everyone was getting on the bus too slowly.
The master honked his horn wildly when he met the traffic lights.
Follow the navigation in the middle and go the wrong way. The master even opened his mouth and scolded, and even blamed the staff for the problem with the mobile phone.
The more their staff explain and help, the more arrogant the driver becomes.
In contrast, the behavior of these early education directors makes people feel much more comfortable.
In this noisy and flustered environment, instead of being angry, the directors of early education came to comfort their staff and said "hard work" to them.
The pattern is high and low, and the character is good or bad, which is clear at a glance.
In fact, everyone will be tired sometimes.
Well-cultivated people will be tired and need comfort, but they know how to manage their emotions and understand the difficulties of others.
A friend who can maintain self-restraint when he is tired is a friend who really deserves to make deep friends.
Writer Jenny Joe said:
"Only when you are exhausted can you see the gap between people. This gap is not how fast you can reach the top, but more importantly, what attitude you take to reach the finish line. "
When a person is physically and mentally exhausted, he can still maintain his original demeanor, which is kindness engraved in his bones.
This kind of person is the most worthy of friendship.