You can't take a tough approach to the baby in the rebellious period, which will only make his rebellious psychology stronger.
The overreaction of his parents will give him a wrong feeling that he can get more attention from his parents when he says no, so he will use this method more to attract their attention. Rebellion is a process that every baby will go through. Parents need some strategies to deal with rebellious babies.
Try the following methods: 1, a little humor makes the atmosphere less tense and serious. For example, if you want your baby to take a bath in the bathtub, but he just won't go, you forcibly carry him into the bathtub, or reprimand him for letting him take a bath, then things will definitely get very bad.
At this time, you might as well give your baby a little humor: "The bath water is down, let's see whose calf runs fast." Tell your little guy to sit in the bathtub. " This different language will bring freshness to the baby, so he will be willing to accept the advice of his parents.
2. Let the baby relax his vigilance. If the baby says no to anything, you might as well give him some ridiculous choices and guide him to say no all the time. At this time, he will let his guard down and focus on those ridiculous problems, so you can find opportunities to drag him where you want him to go or let him do what you want him to do.
3. Turn the task into an interesting game. Babies like games. If they turn tasks into games, I believe they will be more willing to accept them.
For example, he always doesn't want to go to the toilet, so he always wets his pants. Parents estimate that he can pick him up if he wants to go to the toilet: "Now I will take this gun and let him play bullets in the toilet." Such advice will make the baby forget himself soon. No, follow you.
So the task of going to the toilet becomes an interesting game, and he can't say No.4. Let the baby accept the task voluntarily.
Prepare some books for the baby, or make up some interesting stories for him, so that his task becomes his expectation. Or parents do demonstration actions, but don't ask him to do it at all, and he will have a desire to imitate because of curiosity.
5. Use the baby's rebellious psychology. When you want your baby to do something, you will say what you want him to do. At this time, he may do according to your actual requirements. 6. Sometimes, if the baby doesn't understand the real intention of his parents, he will say no without hesitation.
Therefore, when you explain the task to your baby, keep your eyes on him and give him the task very seriously, so that he will understand that you are not joking with him, and he will not casually say No.7. Take turns with the baby.
Because parents do the same thing, and everyone has the opportunity to do it, and must do it according to certain rules, so that he will feel very interesting and generally be willing to accept his parents' suggestions. 8, cold baby.
If the baby doesn't listen to his parents' advice, ignore him and take back his parents' attention, it will make him feel bored. After a while, he will understand that this is not a good way to attract parents' attention, so he will try to change it. Babies around the age of 9 or 2 generally like to come by themselves. Therefore, when the baby says no, parents can try to encourage him to use this opportunity to show his ability, and he will be happy to come by himself.
10 If there is a little brother or sister at home, encourage the baby to be a good example for the little brother or sister, and he will try his best to play this role. When the mother said, "Can you show your brother how to eat by yourself?" The baby must be happy to demonstrate and guide the little brother to eat by himself.
1 1. When you want your baby to do something, you'd better give him two choices, one is what you want him to do and the other is what he doesn't like to do. Usually, the baby will choose what you want him to do.
Rebellious children will not take the initiative to write.
Rebellious child, very sad, she doesn't want to, she just can't stand depression.
-Inscription There is a child who is a good girl. Grow up, gradually rebellious, adults can't control, go their own way.
So everyone hated her, only her friends were good with her, and her parents gradually lost hope for her. She is sad, because it's not that she likes to rebel, but that she likes to sing against others, because she can't stand the pressure, because she is eager to be happy with those friends.
The child goes to school with her sister every day. She is the boss, so everyone else is afraid of her. She leads in every battle. She is strong and never cries.
Because she knows that no one will pity and comfort her when she cries. She despaired of life, completely despaired ... then a boy appeared, and she said to the girl: Since others are disappointed in you, you should cheer up and don't despair.
The girl suddenly woke up and said to herself, I can't let people look down on me. I want those people to see that I am also a great person. This girl began to study hard ... Today, a few years later, this girl became a famous educator. She told people all over the world that she was a rebellious child as a child, a real sister, and was encouraged by a boy to achieve today's achievements.
Everyone can't believe it. She went on to say: the rebellious child is not voluntary, and she is also eager to get the recognition and happiness of others, so there is nothing wrong with the rebellious child, and the fault is the parents, because they do not trust their children and do not give them timely encouragement.
Believe it, rebellious children don't want to, and they have to.
What if the child is rebellious?
People's growth goes through two rebellious periods, the first is about 3 years old, and the second is about 1 1 year old. Rebellion in both periods has its own characteristics and solutions. I wonder how old your child will be in a few years. The following is my analysis and reference, I hope it is beneficial to you.
Three-year-old children's oral English develops fastest, which is also the initial period for them to form their behavior habits and personality. Three-year-old children have a vague sense of self. They want to wear shoes, dress themselves up and eat whatever they want. During this period, if parents go against their wishes, because they are weak, they will fight with words and cry to express their dissatisfaction. Rebellion in this period can be solved by the following methods:
1. Make life rules with children.
Preschool children, it's useless to reason with him, because he doesn't understand, it's better to make three chapters with him. For example, when to go to bed and get up every day, you can watch TV or surf the Internet for several hours, pack up your toys after you finish, and let him finish what tasks every day, such as helping his parents do some cleaning or other housework. After consulting with your child, you can decide and post it in a conspicuous place. If the child does, he will reward or draw a flower. With a few flowers in a row, he can satisfy a child's wish. If the child can't do it, he can use rules to reduce his pocket money or let him do more housework as a punishment, so that the child won't have any opinions, so that he can develop good habits.
2. Give him some freedom of choice.
Without affecting children's health and personal safety, such as what style and color of shoes, clothes, pants, etc. He likes to wear, let him choose what he can wear, but like taking a shower and changing clothes, he will resolutely follow the rules if he has no choice.
3. Respect the child's willingness to do it.
He likes to wear his own clothes and trousers, but he can wear them. It's okay to be silly, but he will come to understand. He likes to imitate adults. Buy him a gadget. Don't bother, let him exercise. Love of labor, filial piety to parents, cherish the fruits of labor, strong hands-on ability and so on are all things from practice.
4. Create a warm and caring family for children. Beating a child can temporarily restrain him, but it hurts his body and mind. He can only hate his parents, stay away from his family and make more mistakes to vent and retaliate against his parents' corporal punishment. Encourage more, punish less, care more about his physical and mental health, create a harmonious family, and easily cultivate a good child.
Another rebellious period is adolescence. Especially in junior high school, that is, children around the age of 1 1. During this period, children's bodies developed rapidly, showing the physical characteristics of adults. Their thoughts have changed from children to adults, and their sense of independence has become stronger. They hope that their parents will stop treating him like a child and do everything according to their parents' wishes. They have their own secrets and hope their parents will give them a space and respect. Rebellion in this period can be solved by the following methods:
Make friends with children, give them the opportunity to explain and express their views, listen to his voice, respect his thoughts and opinions, and love idols. Only by communicating well can we give him guidance and help, and his rebellious mentality will be reduced.
In fact, the child's rebellion shows that he has grown up and has his own thoughts. He wants to prove his ability with his own actions. As a parent, it is normal for a child to do what he says all the time, and not to respect his performance and give him the chance to be independent. If a child has an idea, give him a chance to speak, let go of his parents' respect and listen to his voice. As long as it is not too out of line, let the children do it in their own way, which not only exercises the children's ability, but also allows parents to know their children better, which virtually reduces their rebellion and can make them friends by listening. Children are more willing to tell their parents what they think, and parents know their children better, so that children will be more willing to listen to their parents.
The above is my opinion, I hope it will help you.
Rebellious baby
Often when the baby enters 19 months, his "self-awareness" will gradually increase, and he will gradually know how to say "no" and begin to have his own ideas-this is the growth characteristic of the baby.
For example, before the baby "grabbed the bottle", he simply "wanted to grab the bottle"; Now he grabs the bottle because he wants to drink milk, and the purpose is more clear. He gradually realized what he wanted to do and didn't want to do. For example, the mother wants her baby to sleep, and the baby wants to drink milk, but she can't find a suitable way to let her know his thoughts, because at this stage, the baby's language development is not mature enough to mobilize many words (generally, the baby can use about 20 words) to express his needs, so his external performance can only be crying.
As a result, my mother felt very strange because she didn't know why the baby was so disobedient. In fact, the root cause is that the child's internal needs are not met.
So how should parents deal with such problems? First of all, parents should show their attitude and let the baby know: I can understand your crying, and I don't deny your feelings, but I hope you can find a better way to express your thoughts. Secondly, parents should encourage their babies to express their ideas completely and accurately through other channels, such as body language, such as learning BabySigns.
Keep good communication with children. In this case, the baby feels that his needs can be met, so he will not vent his emotions unreasonably.
Of course, at this stage, the baby's emotional development is not perfect enough to effectively control and regulate his emotions, and parents should give him full understanding. We usually use "half adult and half child" to describe babies of this age.
Therefore, some foreign experts call "rebellious two years old" the "first adolescence". On the one hand, we should learn to understand and respect the baby's needs like adults, on the other hand, we should learn to give more encouragement and support to the baby from the perspective of children.
Guide the baby to learn to solve problems in a certain way to meet the needs. I heard that crooked rabbit early education products are very helpful for babies aged 0-3.
There is a set of delayed gratification teaching materials for rebellious babies. The free early education hotline for 0-3 years old is located in official website at 400-8 1 1-2599.
What about rebellious children?
How to educate children's rebellion is different from the beginning of junior high school: they start talking back, no longer listen to their parents, and have their own little secrets ... In fact, these are all manifestations of children's rebellious youth.
At this time, some parents find it very difficult to educate their children: no beating and cursing, no listening, speaking and teaching. So, how to face and educate adolescent rebellious children? The rebellious period of modern children comes early. "The child suddenly seems to be a different person, which is really difficult to manage." This is the rebellion of many parents, but I don't know why.
Professor Xu introduced that the age of 1 1- 12 is defined as early adolescence in China. Because children in this period are difficult to manage, they are also called "manic period" and "difficult period" abroad. It is said that the psychology of adolescent students has changed because of the increasing pressure of entering a higher school and interpersonal relationship. If there is no correct guidance, children will easily encounter skills and psychological obstacles in cognition, understanding and application, especially under the influence of some abnormal external factors, which will often cause their subconscious resistance, and they will resist the outside world and form "rebellion".
According to the survey, because the environment of today's children is much more complicated than their parents, their rebellious period of youth is 1-2 years earlier than their parents, and they are also under greater pressure. Therefore, when children are "rebellious", parents need not worry too much. They should understand children and pay attention to adjusting their education methods.
Why is it so difficult to teach rebellious children? Why are rebellious children difficult to discipline? To know why, parents need to go deep into their children's hearts and understand what their children are thinking. At school, Professor Xu gave a series of examples.
Case 1: Child A reflects the father's educational problems. He said that he hoped that his father would not always look at himself with suspicion. Case 2: Child B tells his mother, "Don't think that what adults say is right. My words are sometimes right. "
Case 3: The voice of child C, I hope mom and dad don't always praise other people's children, and don't always say how stupid their children are. Case 4: Child Ding said to his father, "I feel worse than others when I see your discouraged eyes."
Professor Xu said that after children enter adolescence, psychological changes are caused by physiological changes. They began to think when things happened, formed immature opinions and began to doubt their parents' words. However, after parents' authority was shaken, it was difficult to adapt for a while, unwilling to lower their social status and adjust their educational methods to face their children. In this regard, children will resist, making it difficult for parents.
Children have rebellious psychology, and family education has laws to follow. Professor Xu believes that plastic surgery is an art. Facing these children at the crossroads, parents should be more patient, careful and attentive in education. (1) Avoid the misunderstanding of bipolar education Parents should treat their children's rebellious youth dialectically, which is a critical period for the formation of their world outlook, and their personality and creativity are rising wantonly. At the same time, due to the limitations of children's physical and mental development and education, many of their ideas are immature and even extreme, which requires external education to guide children correctly.
However, in real education, some parents easily fall into the misunderstanding of educational polarization. Myth 1: A general strike.
Some parents are annoyed with their children's rebellious words and deeds such as talking back and disobedience, and feel that if their children's "evil energy" is not suppressed, their children may become worse. So parents took tough measures, either beating or scolding.
Gradually, on the surface, the child returned to the "good boy" who did what he was told. In fact, in his heart, the door to communication with his parents has been closed. Myth 2: Let yourself go.
In reality, some parents face the children who are difficult to teach, and after several times of discipline, they have little effect, lose confidence and begin to let their children go with the flow. At this time, regardless of the child's words and deeds and thoughts, parents no longer ask and guide.
Over time, children are adversely affected and their behavior is biased. When parents regret it, they find that they have delayed their children's life. (2) delegating power to children Professor Xu said that children are particularly eager to be recognized and respected by the outside world after entering the rebellious period of youth.
Therefore, parents should pay attention to delegating various rights to their children to help them transition from ignorance to maturity. "You should", "You must" and "What do you know" are the pet words of many parents.
Professor Xu suggested that parents should talk as little as possible in the face of rebellious children, because children who think they are adults will not accept such orders. Many parents have told their children the right to speak, such as "sweeping the road without going to college". Although it is for the good of the children, my ears are covered with cocoons. In the rebellious period, they can say that these words are "impeccable".
At this time, parents should talk less and listen more to understand what their children are thinking. Time control children in this period are eager to have their own small world. Therefore, parents should not make their own decisions and arrange their children's time according to their own wishes. They should leave time for the children themselves. For unreasonable arrangements, parents should make suggestions in a negotiated tone, and never completely deny their children.
Some important events in the voting family, such as moving and buying a house, may wish to discuss with the children, consider their feelings and seek their opinions. In a family with a democratic atmosphere, children can generally approach their parents on their own initiative. After children with privacy enter junior high school, some parents find that children who used to tell the truth to themselves are less and less interested in themselves, and children begin to have their own locked diaries and personal letters.
Professor Xu said that if children really don't want to communicate with their parents, they don't have to be too reluctant, especially not to pry into their privacy. Respect for children earned respect for themselves. (3) Parent-child communication skills For children with obvious rebellious psychology, parents will find it difficult to communicate with them.
Professor Xu introduced several practical parent-child communication skills. Respect the parents of children, don't always stare at their weaknesses, and don't compare their shortcomings with the strengths of other children.
When in contact with children, parents should try their best to find the advantages of children and encourage them to reduce their resistance to parents. Empathy parents also came from the rebellious period of youth, but it is not as obvious as today's children, so in the face of children's inexplicable behavior, we might as well think about it.
There is a rebellious baby in my family
If children are occasionally naughty and don't listen to adults, parents often disagree; If children are often disobedient and disobedient, parents will feel a headache.
Unfortunately, many parents find that as their children grow older, their disobedience becomes more and more serious. Under the constant nagging of their parents, their children even have rebellious psychology. No matter what parents say and how good they are, they always deny it first. Strangely, whenever parents tell kindergarten teachers how stubborn their children are, teachers are likely to disagree; When parents tell other acquaintances who have had contact with their children, they often express surprise: "Your child is fine! Not as troublesome as you said! " Parents are really pleased and confused when they hear others say this.
This is the case with Shanshan, who has been attending classes in large classes in kindergarten. In front of teachers and children, Shanshan is enthusiastic, loves to learn, is easy to get along with, is willing to do as the teacher asks, and is often praised by the teacher. But at home, Shanshan always hesitates, especially what she says to her father, which makes her father very unhappy.
The same child, different people have different views. Is there really such a big difference in children's performance in front of their parents and others, or is there another reason? Why do children say, "A few years ago, a primary school made a speech about" What are you dissatisfied with your parents? The findings were published in the journal Children's Studies. Statistics show that there are 58 places where children are dissatisfied with their parents, such as: easy to lose their temper; Don't understand my heart; The requirements are too strict and the standards are too high; Don't accept my opinion; Words don't count; When I want to do my own thing, they always don't let me; When you scold me, you always praise others and so on.
How to treat primary school students' dissatisfaction with their parents? First, this is a survey of primary school students, which has nothing to do with me as a parent of young children; Second, even if there is a match, I'm afraid you don't want to associate such a parent image with yourself. However, if we think about it carefully, our parents are not perfect, and the dissatisfaction of the children above will be reflected on us to some extent.
Don't think that children are too young to understand anything. In fact, although the child didn't say anything, these dissatisfaction have been in his heart and have been reflected in his behavior. Indeed, the dissatisfaction of these children may be the reason to say "no" to their parents.
Adults don't set an example. When a child has some questions, we often ask, "What's wrong with this child?" I'm used to finding reasons from children. In fact, many problems are rooted in parents.
Some children's rebellious psychology and behavior may be caused by the disadvantages of family education. Parents who are strict with their children but not strict with themselves, can children listen to them willingly? Even if what the parents say is reasonable, the child still refuses to accept it. The older the child is, the more obvious this phenomenon is.
For example, Shanshan's father has this problem. He doesn't let Shanshan eat while watching TV, but he often does. Shanshan couldn't help giving advice to her father several times. As a result, when he was happy, he said that he would change it next time. When he was unhappy, he not only refused to listen, but also lost his temper and put on airs as a parent to bully others.
At first, Shanshan just refused to accept the question. Gradually, this dissatisfaction spread, and her father refused to listen to anything she said. Shanshan's rebellious mentality is getting more and more serious. Treat children like children. Some parents always treat their children as children, regardless of their growth. This is another important reason for children's rebellion.
For example, in kindergarten, teachers often teach children to "do things by themselves", and Shanshan especially wants to do something she has never done. One day, Shanshan offered to wash the dishes herself after dinner.
But my mother thought for a while and then said, "What if the bowl is broken?" "What should I do if the debris is stuck in my hand?" Rejected her for other reasons. Shanshan is unhappy if she doesn't get things done well. When she slept, she deliberately didn't go to her little bed, and stayed in her parents' big bed late, making her father want to punish her.
The next night, Shanshan's family went to her aunt's house. After dinner, Shanshan mentioned washing dishes again. My mother repeated yesterday's reason, but I didn't expect my aunt to say cheerfully, "It's a good thing to want to wash the dishes yourself! If you can't reach the tap, I'll give you a small stool. It doesn't matter if the bowl is broken. Aunt will buy a new one. " As soon as Xiao Yan's words were finished, Shanshan excitedly shouted, "Thank you, Xiao Yan."
Then, I immediately went to wash the dishes. I washed them carefully. Children are all good children, so parents really have to think the other way around: they always complain that their children are disobedient. Is it true that children are naturally disobedient and disruptive? Do children really want to be a person who is against their parents everywhere? In fact, it should be said that children are good children and parents are not necessarily good parents.
On the other hand, what is the real reason why parents like good children? We don't like children against themselves. What's the purpose? In fact, to put it bluntly, it is not for your own peace of mind and hard work! Is it a bit selfish and short-sighted to treat children with budding self-awareness and flourishing independence with such a mentality? Six ways to discipline children's waywardness (1) Children's waywardness is too arbitrary and doesn't work at all. For example, if you see something you like, you want to buy it, or you cry.
I believe that many mothers have their brains broken for this. (2) Self-willed psychological analysis This self-willed behavior is the result of parents' excessive tolerance and pampering of their children under certain conditions.
For example, parents always obey the baby's wishes under the torture of their children crying; In addition, children have poor self-control, emotional instability, impulsive, and often use stubbornness to vent their dissatisfaction, which further encourages wayward behavior. Some children are disobedient, and their parents feel helpless, so they let themselves go and become willful over time.
(3) Six ways to divert attention Children's attention is easily distracted and attracted by new things, so they should be good at shifting their attention from what they insist on to other novel and interesting things or things. Once the child's attention is diverted, he will soon forget the requirements and unhappiness just now.
How to get along with rebellious children
Kissing every child is treason.
It's just a little serious, not obvious. My son is rebellious, too. You should spend more time with him every day.
Tell him how happy you are. How many people love him.
Tell him what kind of person you want your son to be. And knowing what he likes to do best. If he does something wrong, he will take it away. My son likes watching cartoons, and I will take it away from him as a punishment for doing something wrong.
Quite effectively, if he cries and makes trouble without reason, I often learn from him and do as he does. My son feels funny every time he sees me like this. Ask me how to use it, and I'll tell you I learned it from you.
Ask his mother if this is good. Many times he is not like this. Of course, every child is different.
I just hope to take these as a reference and take care of him every day! .