Parenting knowledge sharing: what is real education?
The English word for Education is education, which was invented by the famous great philosopher Socrates. Education is the spelling of three roots, which comes first? e？ It means outward. duce？ Is it guidance? tion？ It is a noun. Take it out.
The education we have received since childhood is not to be a screw of a social machine, but to draw it out and let the best of ourselves come out.
By the same token, we have many expectations for our children, and it is the key to make ta self-motivated.
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Let me tell you something about Roger first. Rawls' story:
Roger? Rawls is the first black governor in the history of new york.
He was born in the notorious Dashatou slum in new york. Roger, few children here have decent jobs when they grow up? Rawls is an exception.
At the news conference when he became governor, Rawls made no mention of his struggle history. He mentioned a very strange name, Pierre? Paul.
Pierre? 196 1 year, Paul was hired as the director and principal of Rawls' Daxiong Primary School.
Pierre? When Paul first walked into Daxiong Primary School in Dashatou, he found that the poor children here were worse than? The lost generation? And doing nothing: skipping classes, fighting, and even smashing the blackboard in the classroom.
When Rawls jumped down from the windowsill and reached out to the podium, Pierre? Paul said to him, I can see from your slender little finger that you will be the governor of New York in the future. ?
Rawls was surprised. Only his grandmother once encouraged him that he could be the captain of a 5-ton ship. This time, Pierre? Mr. Paul said he could be the governor of New York! He remembered this sentence and believed it.
From that day on. Become the governor of new york? This became a banner on his life path. His clothes are no longer covered with mud and his speech is no longer mixed with foul language. He became the monitor. In the next 40 years, there was not a day when he didn't ask himself to be governor. At the age of 5 1, Rawls really became governor.
Yes, as this story tells us, children are not motivated. Don't worry, they can be cultivated the day after tomorrow. It is never too late.
The famous American social psychologist David? McLelland in his? Achievement needs theory? I have also expounded a similar view: in order to do better and strive for success, people's achievements need to come partly from nature and partly from the cultivation of their parents.
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How to cultivate children's self-motivation and achievement needs? I have compiled the opinions of some experts such as McLelland and some of my own experiences. Let's take a look:
1. Help children know themselves better.
Did Paul really know from Rawls' little finger that he would become the governor of New York in the future? Of course not.
Only his prediction and affirmation inspired Rawls to re-recognize and judge himself. Facts have proved that he still has great potential and a bright future.
Therefore, Rawls has a strong expectation for future success, which has pushed him forward for 40 years and eventually became a governor.
As the people who know their children best and are closest to them, parents should help them better understand themselves and their real goals, affirm their abilities and potentials, and encourage them to work hard towards their goals.
A little casual encouragement and affirmation at ordinary times may become a spark that inspires children to work hard all their lives.
Read positive books
An interesting study found that at the beginning of17th century, the achievement incentive signals contained in British children's books increased, and the national output value increased after a period of time. At the beginning of the eighteenth century, the signal of achievement incentive declined, and so did the national output value.
Explain the causal relationship: the more children are actively encouraged by Tong Shu to pursue success, the more children will grow into adults with strong demand for achievement in a few years, thus promoting the development of the whole national economy.
This goes back to what I have always believed, what kind of books to read and what kind of person to become. Read more inspirational stories to your child, stimulate his inner desire and self-motivation, and make him full of blood and fighting spirit.
3. Set a moderately difficult goal for your child.
In enterprise management, when the superior sets goals for the subordinate, pay attention to one? Advanced accessibility features? Principle. This means that this goal can neither be easily achieved nor out of reach, and can only be achieved by subordinates through certain efforts.
Parents are strongly advised to adopt this principle. Set moderately difficult goals for children at home, and enthusiastically encourage and help children achieve such goals. In this way, on the one hand, let him establish an attitude of bravely accepting challenges and striving to achieve his goals from an early age; On the other hand, it will not dampen his enthusiasm because the goal is too difficult.
I remember when my son Nana Ogawa just learned chess, it was a very painful thing for him to practice the chess manual. Because he not only had to use his brain to play chess, but also began to recite the chess score (at that time, he had just begun to learn to write).
So, let's start with 1 day 2. When he really can't do it, I will guide him and encourage him; When he really can't write, I will hold his hand and write to him one by one. Every time he answers two questions, I will solemnly congratulate him. In his eyes, you can clearly see pride and confidence.
Slowly, he can practice chess every day, with more and more topics and better handwriting. Now, Nana Ogawa is very active in learning chess, clamoring all day to become a first-class chess player.
4. Set an example for children and let them see excellent parents.
It is said that parents are the best teachers for children.
But if the teacher asks the child to read, he has been brushing his mobile phone; Ask the child to do his homework carefully, but the child is watching TV; Ask children to improve their grades, enter the top few ages, and have always been willing to be small clerks.
Read the story of such a mother.
She is very capable of working, and her team of 100 people is busy all day. At home, I am also very filial to my elders. I can cook a good dish, and I can draw and write Chinese calligraphy. ......
In the eyes of children, she is an omnipotent mother. Both her children are excellent, not only studying well, but also being polite. No one can fail to praise her children.
The children said to her like this: Mom, we must work very hard to make ourselves excellent, otherwise, how can we be your children?
To make children work hard, we must constantly improve ourselves and let children see an excellent parent.
If a child's self-motivation is strong and keeps it up, then even if the child's IQ is not too high, he can persevere, achieve better results and become a useful person in society in the future. If children are smart and don't make progress, their grades will not be ideal. Therefore, it is very important to cultivate children's self-motivation.
Parents should strive to cultivate their children's self-motivation. Children are generally self-motivated, but some children have suffered some setbacks for various reasons, and their self-motivation has dropped sharply, and finally they are depressed. Some children have never been ahead, and their grades have always been average, which has not reflected more joy of success, thus hindering the development of self-motivation.
Parents should distinguish the reasons for their children's lack of self-motivation, and take certain measures accordingly to make their children become self-motivated children.
Parenting knowledge sharing: how to cultivate children's self-motivation?
1. Set a smaller goal for your child.
For children with poor foundation and poor self-confidence, in order to improve their interest, we can first set them a smaller goal, let them try the joy of success, further enhance their self-confidence and psychologically accept this new goal. For example, children's Chinese foundation is not good enough, and their writing is not self-motivated, right? Broken cans and broken falls? Absent-minded thoughts in class. In this case, parents should first tell their children the importance of learning to write and improve their self-confidence. In specific learning, let children write more diaries, accumulate more materials and practice more pens, starting with a character and a scene, and then give more encouragement to children. Finally, write the homework given by the teacher and improve the writing level continuously.
2. Analyze the reasons and prescribe the right medicine.
For children who have suffered setbacks, when their grades drop, they can tell them about their previous good grades and some encouragement from their teachers. Then let the children analyze the reasons for the decline in performance, such as delayed homework due to serious illness, incorrect learning methods, mixing with bad children and so on. So as to restore your confidence, and then choose corresponding methods according to the reasons, such as taking time to review, changing learning methods, separating from bad children and so on.
3. Guidance through examples
Parents can tell their children stories of promising people such as scientists who are motivated when they are young, so that their children can become talents and enhance their initiative. Indeed, Edison, Darwin, Einstein, etc. They didn't do well in school when they were young. When they grew up, they also made great achievements. The key is your own efforts. You can also find examples of parent units to guide, so that education will be more effective.
4. Discover your child's specialty
Children always have their own specialties. As long as you look patiently, you can start with this major, improve your self-motivation, and let them affirm their value. Let the children talk about their ideals, what they want to do in the future, and determine the goal of success. For example, children like playing chess, which can make them wonder what it's like to be a chess king and beat the invincible hand in the world, and so on. Then let the children transfer this self-motivation to study.
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