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From the perspective of social psychology, how to cultivate your lover?
Three ways: 1. Establish power through rewards and punishments. 2. Build attraction. 3. Cultivate his consciousness.

Provide some rewards when the other party performs well, and punish when the other party does not perform well. Rewards should be continuous and gradual. If you can't get up, give him a big reward. For example, if you buy him a new computer directly, the investment is too large to be sustainable. After setting the tone with big rewards, some small rewards may not easily arouse his interest. In addition, in terms of punishment, we should pay attention to the scale. The premise of punishment is that it is not enough to affect the deeper attraction.

No matter how close two people are, it is best to keep a certain mystery. Don't expose all your ideas to him, and don't completely cater to his requirements. Let yourself always let him spend a little time guessing and fully mobilize his emotions, which is also a major manifestation of attraction.

Cultivating conscious mind is a long-term project, and what you can do is only a guiding role at best, so it is difficult to directly influence it. Personal experience of personality consciousness is the direct factor.