Absolutely not. It can only be said that you suffered a lot in the process of learning mathematics and left a big wound in your heart. Most students in China will have this kind of bitter brain. You're not the only one.

As for why I can't learn well, I can only say that I am not interested in mathematics and have not found a way to learn. This is normal. The world is so big, but it is definitely not covered by the six subjects of the college entrance examination.

As for how to make up for this defect in my heart, in my opinion, it is to find my own interests, find my own strengths, strive for perfection, and make it my own specialty. Be the source of your confidence. That's when you think back. Mathematics has long been a memory. In other words, you have been able to face it with a supercilious attitude and confidently say to yourself, "Actually, I can do it."