Since ancient times, many things have changed, but the wish of parents to "wish their children success" has not changed, which is the eternal wish of parents all over the world. So, how do parents realize this wish?
There is an old saying in China, "As long as you work hard, iron bars are ground into needles". On the issue of educating children, it is no exception. As long as you treat it with your heart and work hard, your dreams and wishes will surely blossom and bear fruit, and your ideals will surely become a reality. So, what responsibilities and obligations should parents bear in this process?
Kai-fu Lee believes that parents should first be aware of their responsibilities and obligations. No matter whether their family is rich or poor, they should know that they are the first teachers of their children, and at the same time, they should be lifelong teachers of their children without any slack. In the specific training of children, parents should do the following:
First, adult education for children.
Regarding children's adult education, Kai-fu Lee defined it as the education of morality, personality, love and frustration. Cultivate a good personality, and then tell the stories of outstanding people who have made achievements at home and abroad, and carry out talent and ideal education. This kind of lasting education can help children learn a lot about being a man through their parents' words and deeds, which is conducive to cultivating children's quality of being academically excellent.
Second, cultivate children's good study habits and living habits.
For cultivating children's good habits, Li Kaifu believes that children should start from an early age. Because, when a person forms a good personality, he is educated at an early age. From the time children can speak, we begin to give positive guidance consciously, starting with the use of civilized language, and then gradually. In primary school, it is mainly to cultivate good study habits, including listening carefully in class, listening attentively to lectures, actively completing homework and not relying on parents.
If you find any shortcomings in your child's study and life, it will be better to correct them in time. After training in primary school, we can form a good habit of studying hard, being hard-working, doing homework seriously and not worrying about his study, which can lay a solid foundation for heavy study in middle school.
Third, children in middle school should know how to grasp personality and carry out adult education.
Many of your mothers think that adolescent children are the most difficult to manage, and Kai-fu Lee also feels this way, but he pointed out that although children in this period are difficult to manage, problems often occur at this stage. Judging from the growth process, at this stage, they have changed from children to teenagers, and most of them have entered adolescence. Children in this period are easy to rebel with their parents and feel strange and hazy about many things. Parents should pay more attention to their children. A good family environment can give children a safe harbor. If parents ignore it, problems will arise.
In this regard, Kai-fu Lee suggested: For an ordinary family of three, every weekend, after lunch, the father takes the children to play on the playground, and the mother cleans up the housework. After the ball is played, the family is cleaned up. A family of three can go to the mall or go for a walk in the park, which is very enjoyable. Such a family environment can provide a good way for children to communicate.
Fourth, exert the great power of love.
Kai-fu Lee advocates the education of love. He thinks love is very important to children. Therefore, in the process of children's growth, parents give their children more dedication, tolerance, understanding, support and encouragement.
Some parents send their children to the countryside to feed because of their busy work. Hold the child back until he grows up. However, when the child returned to him, he found that there were many problems in the child. Some children grow up in the countryside, because of poor conditions, they are not spoiled and spend all day with rural children. When they arrive at school, they are often covered in plaster. Perhaps it is this environment that has cultivated his simple and kind quality. On the other hand, parents may find that their children are spoiled in some ways. At this time, parents should affirm the good side of their children and correct their bad behaviors and habits in time.
At the same time, parents should be good role models for their children. People say that the power of example is infinite, parents are role models for children, and parents' personality charm and professionalism are silent teachers for children. In a family with equal personality, children have the right to discuss and solve all family affairs with their parents. Children can criticize any family member who has done something wrong. Family members respect and learn from each other. Parents are children's parents and intimate friends, and they are the first choice listeners to listen to children's joys and sorrows.
Fifth, be a child's closest friend.
A pair of parents saw a test in the middle school students' column of CCTV at home and asked the high school students present at that time who their closest friends were.
The answer is surprising. In fact, 78% people say they are their classmates, and only 22% people say they are their parents.
It happened that the parents also had a child in high school, so at 1 1 that night, the son went home for self-study the next night. They asked his son about this topic. At that time, my son blurted out without thinking that his closest friends were his parents. Husband and wife often feel that they are the happiest people at that time, and the hard work of 18 has not been in vain. The child said that his parents are the closest friends, which does not mean that he has a bad relationship with his classmates. On the contrary, from primary school to high school, he has many good friends, and even his classmates in primary school are still in contact, let alone junior high school and high school.
It can be seen how happy it is to be a child's closest friend!
But to be a child's intimate friend, we must have a sense of responsibility and be responsible for the child, that is, to the family and the society. Understanding, tolerance and communication with children can gain children's respect and trust. For example, if the child is in a bad mood or does something wrong, parents should not be angry, let alone beat and scold. Instead, he should be calm and wait for the best opportunity to talk and communicate while shopping and walking, so that he can accept it easily and the effect is good.
Sixth, cultivate children's sense of competition.
Nowadays, most of the only children are self-centered, and such children often cannot establish a good sense of competition.
In this case, parents should educate their children to treat themselves correctly, treat their classmates correctly, learn to praise others, praise their advantages (classmates' advantages), praise promising people, form a healthy sense of competition, learn from each other and learn from each other's strengths.
Seven, a comprehensive and correct view of children's academic performance.
For parents, letting their children grow naturally can reduce a lot of pressure on their children without putting forward too high and unrealistic requirements.
A child got 86 points in math in elementary school. He told his parents that day, and their parents were not angry at all, nor did they scold him. Instead, they asked him calmly, "son, do you think this kind of problem is too difficult to do, or are you careless when you do it?" He replied that it was carelessness. Mom smiled and said, "if you really can't do it, mom won't blame you." If you are careless, you must change it in the future. " After listening to his mother's words, the child felt much more comfortable and learned a lesson, so he won't make careless mistakes in the future.
Some parents promised to reward their children for doing well in the exam. In fact, this practice often makes children have the idea of learning for their parents.
A mother's education method is very good. Because her child is very young, she didn't give her child any reward, no matter how well she did in the exam! When the child was admitted to a key middle school with excellent results, the mother knew that the child had a strong personality in learning, so she told the child as soon as possible: the students in this school are top students, and you may not be able to be the first in the class again. But as long as you don't lose heart and study hard, I won't blame you!
In this way, the child determines the direction of his efforts. In the first year, he was often dissatisfied with his grades and always complained that all the wrong questions were wrong. His mother has always encouraged him to learn from experience. In this way, the child's sad heart was comforted by his mother, and his mood immediately improved. Especially before the college entrance examination, many students' parents are talking about the important decision of which school to take, and they are very worried. In fact, the child's mother is also very worried. However, despite her nervousness, she still acted as if nothing had happened. One or three days before the college entrance examination, she still went for a walk, went shopping and played ball with her son to adjust her psychology and told her children that as long as you worked hard, we would be very satisfied. You are our proudest child.
With the encouragement of your mother, your child walked into the examination room without any pressure, played very well and was admitted to his ideal university!
Eight, educate children to know how to respect teachers.
Many children will tell their parents that the teacher is not good after entering middle school, and some parents are also very picky about the teacher. In fact, this practice is very unfavorable to children's learning. Respecting teachers is first of all a quality, and secondly, children often study hard because of respecting teachers. These parents should have a full understanding and a good proper limit.
Parents do not play a negative role in front of their children. Don't talk about their children's teachers. They should tell their children that they must be qualified to be their own teachers, and there are many things worth learning, including knowledge and personality. Leaders of all ages have respected teachers, and we ordinary people should respect teachers even more.
You know, if parents say which teacher is bad in front of their children, then the children will not listen to this teacher's class again. Therefore, educating children to respect teachers is actually helping them.
Nine, support children's hobbies
Support children's legitimate hobbies, including spiritual, economic and time support. As long as it is a hobby that is conducive to the all-round development of children, parents should try their best to satisfy it.
There is a child who has been learning violin since the third grade. When he was a beginner, he always asked his parents to pick him up. Later, he was not allowed to go by himself until the second year of high school. He practiced for another year in his freshman year. After the second year of high school, he had to give up violin practice in order to be admitted to the university.
On the surface, practicing the piano has not brought any academic help to children. However, it is very important to cultivate children's habit of concentration, calm down and train their right brain ability through practicing piano.
Some children like to do things, and their parents are very unhappy. In fact, children like to make things by hand, which does not necessarily affect their study. One child likes four-wheel drive very much. His parents not only don't oppose him, but also support him. All the necessary tools, small drills, small files, glue and pigments, are bought with parents, from primary school to middle school every year. Look at his concentration, it really makes his parents happy. He wore a mask when drawing the finished model, which made his mother say that he really looked like a shipyard. In junior high school, because the child played well in four-wheel drive, he participated in the competition on behalf of the whole province and won the fourth place! The child was very happy about this and told his mother that he would build a real car when he grew up!
Ten, and children learn from each other, * * * has made progress.
There are many places where parents and children can learn from each other, from being a man to learning knowledge, which can be discussed.
Some children learn novel knowledge at school and always like to tell it to their parents. At this time, parents must have enough patience. For example, watching TV, magazines or newspapers at home at night is actually time to communicate with children. Especially when children go to high school, they don't have much time to read newspapers and magazines. Parents can read more books in their spare time, and then tell their children those novel and inspiring people and things while walking. In this way, we have long insisted on communicating with each other. Although the children are nervous about their studies, they don't concentrate on reading sage books. Although their parents are old, their knowledge will not age.
Parents should understand that children are the continuation of their own lives, and nothing can make up for the problems in cultivating children.
Therefore, parents should know how to regard their children's education as an important part of their lives and careers and be responsible for their children!
Parents, please come in. No, you think too much. You need not regret it. If you are an adult, but after all, your parents are elders and have experienced a lot, it doesn't hurt to talk to them. It's also good to ask their opinions and opinions. Relax, your parents won't blame you when they find out. After all, you have grown up. Can deal with some personal problems. Have a happy day! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
Since you can raise this question here, it shows that you are still a filial child, but you are too bad at expressing your feelings, and there may be some barriers between you and your parents. In fact, any parents care about their children, maybe in different ways, some are gentle and some are rude, but parents love their children the same. Don't say anything deliberately. You can make a phone call to ask about the situation at home and the physical condition of your parents, even if your parents say, listen. You don't have children of your own. If you become a parent yourself, you will realize the unparalleled love of parents for their children.
Parents' distress, children are addicted to children's things ~ adults don't touch, don't understand, and directly deny. Children playing games is nothing more than a sense of accomplishment in the game. Your children are addicted to other people's children. So they can play together. Education is not preaching. Right or wrong, you understand it yourself and enter it directly into others. Who can accept it? If parents are really responsible for their children, they should be cooler! You can't say that you will always play children's games, but at least you must know how to play them. Let his achievements in the game win the trust of children and encourage him to say that he is very talented. You can join the professional game team ... If your child really has a talent for games, now the professional team can win glory for the country, realize their wishes, and then encourage him to learn valuable things from what he is addicted to. Everything has two sides. What parents have to do is to give their children the way to know the world and the ability to think independently. To tell the truth, after playing games for so many years as a child, I feel so annoyed now. How to get children to transfer their interest in the Internet may be too difficult. Internet is a part of the future, but it is much easier to solve it simply from online games. Let him make a boyfriend and girlfriend ~ give children wisdom instead of experience.
1, children, like small animals, act according to their instinctive desires, so this is normal.
2. It is also important to educate children without teaching their fathers. You just gave him money to spend, but you didn't restrain him. Of course he knows.
Your children owe you. Think about it. Do you owe your parents? One generation owes another, and this account is unclear.
4. Let the child know that money is earned by giving, and he will know how to cherish it. If he tries to meet your requirements, how you spend the money you give him is even more out of your control.
How to be a good parent and child? Relocation of public houses, purchase of houses with demolition funds, self-occupation and filial piety. You must live in a family that is easy to give birth and see if your parents are responsible for you.
I suggest you use the demolition money to buy a house, even if your parents bought it for me. Don't do anything wrong and let it go back on its word.
Understand that filial piety is never wrong.
Help from parents. Answer it. We are all parents, so we can't just consider moral issues when educating our children. In the current social situation, the most important thing to educate children is personal safety, and children do not catch thieves and violate morality. Children should be taught not to do what they can't do for morality. If you find a thief, you can quietly hint to an adult to deal with it when the thief is not paying attention, or try to hint to the stolen person to make him pay attention.
The troubles of being a new parent are not easy. Let's all work hard
Parents will not have any misunderstanding, but will be very pleased. I feel that children have really grown up, understand and care about their parents, and have their own thoughts.
However, I suggest you don't tell your parents what you think yet.
Because the company you want to start only did market research and thought it would be profitable, but it didn't really work. It is still uncertain about the business situation!
I want to ask: which business investment does not think it will be profitable?
Besides, you have just entered the society and are inexperienced.
I'm not throwing cold water on you, I'm telling you to calm down and think about it!
Wait until your career is successful before making such a decision!
And if you want to transfer the property right of the house to your brother's name after handing over the house, you have to go through the transfer formalities, which will cost a lot of money, you know?
Someone who thinks from your interests and perspectives! People who want to help you!
What are the methods/steps to teach people how to be parents?
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1: A good primary school is an essential consideration for every parent, and the teacher's personality and tone of voice also indirectly affect children's imitation and learning.
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2. Parents' way of doing things; When dealing with people, support and respect relatives, be honest and polite, and all aspects should consider whether it is improper to stand in the other side's position. Only when they set an example will the children follow suit.
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3. The education of children should not be blindly beaten and scolded. Beating and cursing can only show that you have nothing to say about weakness. Only relying on truth to educate is king, and this time also reflects whether a parent has the ability to change a person's life.