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Why try to be better?
1

In high school, in order to get more attention from the boys I like, I tried to make myself better and better.

Although I don't know what kind of girl he likes, I subconsciously feel that as long as I am excellent and beautiful, I deserve his love.

In order to keep a symmetrical figure forever, for a long time, I only drink a cup of 150ml yogurt at night, or just eat an apple. Before going to bed, I will dip a cotton swab into vc capsules to apply eyelashes, and then lie in bed and do aerial cycling.

I don't cut my hair, and the tips of my hair will swing around my waist and wear a high ponytail, so I will consciously correct my sitting posture in class. Even if my hands and legs can swing, I will consider whether my back looks good in his eyes.

Even I will practice smiling radian, bright smile and shy smile in front of the mirror, hoping that when I smile, he can see a ray of light.

In study, he is also my energy source and spiritual pillar. I am poor at math and geography. Whenever I solve a problem that I can never solve, I really want to give up, but when I look back at him secretly, I will stick to it.

Anyway, all my efforts at that time were for him. I hope he can see and appreciate me.

However, the result is not satisfactory. Advanced version of me, in the college entrance examination summer vacation, completely brokenhearted. Although my change has attracted more outstanding science men than him.

But the person I like still doesn't like me.

For a long time, I was in a sad state. I feel that it is a waste of time to draw water with a sieve.

But after going to college, my peach blossom seems to have died, and I don't understand why boys suddenly confessed to me. Joining a club will also be praised by colleagues and feel that their performance is natural and graceful.

I was very happy to get these recognitions, and I began to re-examine myself. It turns out that I am trying to change my ultimate meaning, not to be liked by him, but for this moment, for this moment, I am very satisfied with myself.

Later, when I read Yi Shu's Brave New World, there was a sentence that told me all my feelings.

Life is only a few decades, and the most important thing is to satisfy yourself, not to please others.

2

As a first-line (18) author, I also have fans, and even many little fresh meat "little sisters" and "little sisters" call around me.

I have the same expectation. One day, someone will read all my Weibo, friends circle and articles, just because they are interested in me and want to know my path.

As a result, when all this really happened, I found myself not as moved as I thought, even a little embarrassed. God, how can he boast about the article a year ago? I can't even read it myself. Don't embarrass me.

It turns out that I just want you to see what I am writing at the moment. This is the best thing I can give you now.

As for whether you will fall in love with me because of my words, I dare not ask for it.

Even if one day I can write a story that surprises everyone, it doesn't mean that I am loved by others. I can't exaggerate the role of self-righteous conditions in love, because after removing this label, I have nothing to love.

In fact, rich people who have been broken up and deceived elites abound. Finally, we should pay attention to the state of two people getting along. We can't turn some strange things into attachment to love.

Of course, those who said they would accept me and tease me soon lost their enthusiasm. They didn't become my neighbors and didn't appear in the convenience store downstairs. Only I am still polishing my story, hoping to touch the sensitive nerves of more people.

three

I have a friend in the same trade, who is beautiful and started a company at a young age, holding primary capital and chips. But so what? Those who should go still can't stay. She can't remember how many times she has been lovelorn.

Sometimes when we drink at night, she said, "I really want to get drunk and then sleep to death." When I woke up, I dissolved the company and I wandered around the world. "

But at dawn, her fixed biological clock will wake her up. She packed her things and drove to the company to be her seemingly indifferent female boss.

In a city like Beijing, falling in love is a beautiful wish, and settling down is a tangible reality.

But on the other hand, we will be happier. We love ourselves and have the ability to love ourselves. When the beloved person appears, we can love each other better and love each other better.

I think, even if I get better and better, but love doesn't come as promised, I will applaud myself and be happy for myself.

Haizi said:

You come to the earth/you want to see the sun/you walk in the street with your sweetheart/.

I want to add one thing:

Live your best.