1. A shy boy finally got up the courage to ask his beloved girl: What kind of boy do you like? The girl said: hit it off. The boy asked the same question again and had to say sadly, can't you have a flat head?

Tomorrow, when you wake up, there is a mosquito lying on your pillow, and there is a suicide note beside you, which says: I struggled all night, but I couldn't pierce your face. You are so cheeky, I have no face to live in this world! Lord ~ forgive him! I killed myself.

3. A man and a woman had an affair, and her husband suddenly went home. The man jumped out of the window and walked in the street without clothes on. The man pretended to look at the sky as if nothing had happened: Ah, this is the earth. Passers-by said: Cao, an alien with chicken feathers.

One night, a naked man called a taxi, and the female driver stared at him. The naked man was furious and shouted: You have never seen a naked man! The female driver was also furious: I see where the fuck you lost!

The teacher wanted to make sure that all the girls in the class were here after work, so he said to him, "Go and tidy up all the girls in the class." The Sports Commission was a little goat and asked, "Which one?" The teacher said, "I know I want you to go!" " "

6. Four mice brag: A: I eat rat poison as candy every day; B: it itches if you don't step on a mouse for a day; C: Don't go to the streets several times a day. D: it's getting late. Let's go home and hug the cat.

7. One day, a fly mother and son had lunch together. The son asked the mother fly, "Why do we eat shit every day?" The mother fly said angrily,' Don't say such disgusting things when eating, eat while it is hot! ! '

8. A drunk accidentally fell from the third floor, attracting passers-by. A policeman, come here: What happened? Drunk: I don't know. I just arrived.

9. In front of the counter of Lamian Noodles Store, a beautiful girl is waiting in line. When she arrived, Master Lamian Noodles asked, Do you want a thick one or a thin one? Girl: I'll eat whatever you pull.

10. I said, "You are a pig." You said, "I am a pig!" " From now on, I will call you a pig. Finally one day, you can't help yelling at me in front of everyone: "I'm not a pig!" " "

1 1. White rabbit Q B ran after Big Wolf, and Big Wolf was indignant and pursued him. The rabbit dressed up as a gray rabbit and read the newspaper with glasses. The wolf asked, can you see a white rabbit? Rabbit: Is it the wolf's little white rabbit? Wolf shame: I'm KAO, so soon?

12. Do you have a TV? Now hurry to see the central Zhao Benshan killed, the police blocked the northeast, 19 died, 1 1 disappeared, 1 cheated!

13. I saw a penny on the side of the road, and I was about to bend down to pick it up. It turned out to be phlegm. Damn it, who threw up so round?

14. The chimpanzee accidentally stepped on the stool pulled by the gibbon. After the gibbon cleaned it gently and carefully, they fell in love. People ask how they are together. Chimpanzees said with emotion: ape dung! It's all ape shit!

15. The miser was on a business trip. He was afraid that others would steal the wine he just ordered, so he wrote on a piece of paper: I spit in the cup. After a while, he came back and found a few more words on the note: I vomited too!

16. A college student was caught by the enemy. The enemy tied him to a telephone pole and asked him, where are you from? I'll electrocute you if you don't tell me! The college student replied to the enemy's words and was electrocuted. He said, I'm from TV University!

17. Someone rode into the street, crossed an intersection and spread his arms. The traffic police exclaimed after seeing it: "Good palm!" Someone waved happily and replied, "Comrades have worked hard!" "

18. Wolf cubs are born vegetarians. Mother wolf and father wolf racked their brains to train wolf cubs to hunt. Finally, Sirius's parents were happy to see their son chasing rabbits. The wolf cub grabbed the rabbit's fierce face and said, boy! Hand over the carrots!

19. In junior high school math class, the teacher talked about equation transformation. He rolled up his sleeves on the podium and shouted: Attention, students! I'm going to change. ...

20. Chief: Hello, comrades! Soldier: Hello, sir! Chief: comrades are all tanned! Soldier: The leader is blacker! The chief patted a soldier's chest and said, how well this muscle is trained! Soldier: Sir, I'm a female soldier.