"Don't waste time!" Many parents say that about their children. However, can children have the best learning and growth without wasting time at all?
When Carol was a child, grandma lived with us for a long time. Because both parents work, we have a lot of time with grandma after school or during winter and summer vacations.
Grandma is a very powerful woman in Taiwan Province Province. Although she can't read, she can calculate the multiplication table of 1999 because she runs a "firewood shop", and even because she has a grandson, she can basically understand "Mandarin". She is a very energetic and capable woman! One of her greatest hobbies is watching Taiwanese opera. So many of my memories after primary school are watching Taiwanese opera with my grandmother, and I can even play with them.
When I was a little older, I was fascinated by Jin Yong's novels for a while, probably spending the fifth and sixth grade math class with Jin Yong. Although it was "forbidden" at that time, I think my parents turned a blind eye. If only they had studied and passed the exam. Therefore, the greatest achievement of Kairuo Primary School is to complete the complete works of Jin Yong! Watching Hong Kong dramas in junior high school is also about watching Jin Yong's stories. During the winter and summer vacations, we are "chasing drama" all day.
I still remember that when I go to school every day, what I think about is not the content in the textbook, but what martial arts moves and fantasies I am a woman's daydream. This was very useful when I was in high school later, because several of our classmates talked about Jin Yong every day, and wrote reports, essays and novels. Carol even finished writing a short martial arts story! So far, these are precious and important memories of Carol.
When my sister was young, she still had a lot of free time, playing with toys and playing around in the west. Even in the first grade, she finished reading The Complete Works of Harry Potter! At that time, she liked reading, cooking and baking with me. But I found that when she entered the third grade, everything changed. Her main job after returning to China is "doing homework".
"How can there be so much homework? I feel that the time when we can watch Taiwanese opera and eat sweet soup after school has magically disappeared. I did the math for my sister. After returning home, I deducted the time for math tutoring, homework, bathing, eating and packing my schoolbag after class. She usually only has more than one hour of free time a day.
I have been asking myself, if this continues, will she still have the very lovely but extremely lovely childhood memories of Mommy? If all her "leisure activities" should be carried out on holidays, wouldn't it be worse than adults? At least we can watch movies and play online games after the children go to bed on weekdays. Besides studying at school, children have to do their homework after class. To paraphrase what my sister said, "In the past, my life, school and homework almost occupied everything. 」
In fact, this is the real reason why I encourage my sister to try in Germany: the children in Taiwan Province Province are really busy!
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Not because I think German education is so special, but because I am a busy man in Taiwan Province Province, I always feel that I have no time to eat and sleep well. But after moving to Germany, the pace of my life slowed down with the pace here. On Sunday, almost all the shops are closed, so we can only plan "boring activities" with our family and friends on Sunday. Children also go to bed early, so even busy parents have their own time after eight or nine.
The number of classes in German middle schools is not as large as that in Taiwan Province Province, and the proportion of schoolwork in life is not so much.
I only hope that my sister, who is already in the sixth grade and overwhelmed by math and all the recitation, can have a short rest and enjoy some "idle" time. This is also the beginning of my "educational experiment". I want to have a try. Don't be so delicate. Can children learn the same thing and grow up? And I also want to try to see if I can "put it down" and leave it alone. "Hurry up in the past, everything is over! Hurry up! Mom, I really don't like it myself.
My sister's first semester in Germany is coming to an end. Now, after school, my sister participates in the basketball team two days a week and has the opportunity to play in major cities. She likes the feeling of this team very much. On other days, she was at home before four o'clock. We cook or make cakes together and play with my brother. Sometimes we meet directly at the subway station and go shopping and eat snacks together.
Children here play football and sand after class, and even children play football and sand all day! My sister doesn't have much homework at school, most of which has been done in class. Sometimes, I heard my sister say "no homework today" for several days in a row! However, my sister seems to have learned a lot.
It seems that nothing has happened. But this made me discover the benefits of children's "having time to waste".
First, when she is free, she no longer just wants to be "empty" but will "plan".
When I first came to Germany, I told her to do what I wanted, at least temporarily. A month later, she began to feel so decadent. She said, "I don't like a decadent life" (this is our sister? )!
Now, she sometimes says to me before going to school, "Mom, shall we have muffins today?" Or tell me her plans for the weekend. When there is enough time, the child's brain will move to make a plan, otherwise it will be too late to empty it. What's the plan to talk about?
My sister also has homework at school, but most of them can be finished in less than an hour every day. Take my sister (12 years old) as an example. If she goes to bed after nine o'clock every day, she has about four hours of free time. Now, she seldom gets angry because she can't finish her homework, or feels stressed because of school work.
However, she often comes home to tell me what to do at school tomorrow, so she has any plans tonight and when to finish her homework. Even she told me that she wanted to learn how to make dim sum this year, and she would look up information on the Internet and plan with me where she wanted to travel. I like this "smart" daughter!
Second, "family time" has become the largest proportion in life.
In the past, "family time" was at the dinner table, while others were "take a bath quickly", "do your homework quickly" and "go to bed quickly". Now, it will take nearly three hours to get out. What my sister often does is "play with my brother". As soon as she got home, she washed her hands and hugged her brother, and we talked about what happened to each other today.
We spend a lot of time chatting. She can cook with me, enjoy the food slowly and "whisper" before going to bed. This made the mother with an adolescent daughter feel a little relieved. At least we can talk about everything when we have time. She can enjoy a lot of precious time with her brother.
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I retired from the role of "nagging mom".
I used to urge her to do things, but now I am often scared by my sister who has finished everything. She just came up to me and said, "I'm ready! In our family, this means that she is ready to whisper before going to bed, and she has finished everything. Tonight, I didn't say a word "go do OO". I feel a little elegant. ...
I often think, how can we change the living conditions of children in Taiwan Province Province? How can children have the ability and motivation to think and learn independently? To tell the truth, I still have no solution. I'm still doing my educational experiment, and I haven't graduated completely. But I hope this little experience sharing can make adults start thinking. Maybe we shouldn't be so afraid of children's "idleness" and "wasting time", but we can trust them more and guide them more.
Children in Taipei have experienced their first winter vacation without homework, which may not change much, but it is also an opportunity for us as parents to think about "leaving blank", and it may also be a possible way to make children's heads in Taiwan Province Province "move" again! Perhaps it is a real opportunity for parents in Taiwan Province Province to accompany their children again (not just do their homework)!