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Humor hurts.
1, I came quietly and left quietly, waving a dagger and leaving no one alive.

2. What is the biggest difference between Jesus and Sakyamuni? They have big curly hair and small curly hair.

3. Why are my eyes always full of tears? Because I pretend to be deep.

4. There are no windtight walls and no hanging beams.

5. When there is a bright moon, look up by yourself.

6, long-term must be divided, long-term must be combined; Drinking will drive you crazy. You will drink every glass of wine.

7. What are you unhappy about? Say it to make everyone happy.

8. In front of China team, Thailand team wearing yellow jerseys also had the demeanor of Brazil team in a trance.

9. When the Eight Immortals cross the sea, find every mother and the Eight Immortals cross the sea. Please keep your seat belt fastened.

Women are made of water, men are made of mud, and Li Junji and Chris Lee are both made of cement.

1 1. Men in bars are looking for excitement, while women are mostly looking for excitement.

12, don't blame the dog for looking like a steamed stuffed bun.

13, when you can't figure it out, think about yourself in China, and everything will suddenly become clear.

14, heroes don't ask for a way out, hooligans don't look at their age.

15, put up two fingers and said to the students, "Students, the key to learning math well is three words! ! Do more exercise.

16, unreasonable, there must be a plan!

17, happiness is a comparative level, and something can only be felt at the bottom.

18, one sentence "Take it" is better than two sentences "I'll give it to you".

19, the biggest difference between doing and not doing is that the latter has the right to comment on the former.

20. When a man meets a woman, there is only an anniversary, not an independence day.

2 1, close your eyes and I see my future. ...

22. When the road is rough, shout and move on.

23. You don't know what dependence is until you drop your belt.

24. Life is sometimes like a computer. If it collapses, it collapses. It's not negotiable.

25, the sea is wide with diving, and the drums are broken.

26. The grievances that can be said are not grievances; A lover who can be taken away is not a lover.

27. Smoke is not obedient, so we smoke.

28. It is better to be beautiful than to live beautifully!

29. Besides love, there are radishes in other people's fields.

30. I thought that if I was "invisible", others would not find me. It's no use. People like me, like fireflies in the dark, are bright enough and outstanding enough.

3 1, diamonds last forever, and one goes bankrupt!

32, the iron cock will leave some rust, you are simply a stainless steel cock!

33. I was pulled out before I could flirt.

34. Everyone is born primitive. Sadly, many people have gradually become pirates!

35. Don't say that others are mentally ill. The premise of having a brain is that you must have a brain.

36. Lie down where you fell.

37. I am not a prince Why do girls always think they should be princesses when they see me?

38. The most contradictory place between lovers is dreaming about each other's future, but thinking about each other's past.

39. If you are angry for one minute, you will lose 60 seconds of happiness.

40, busy is a kind of happiness, so that we have no time to experience pain; Running around is a kind of happiness, which makes us truly feel life; Fatigue is a kind of enjoyment, which leaves us no time to be empty.

4 1, life is like "breathing", "breathing" means exhaling, and "sucking" means fighting for a breath.

42. Knowledge is like underwear; it is invisible but important.

43. Marriage is to wear cotton-padded clothes freely. It's inconvenient to move, but it will be warm.

44. The hero is sad about the beauty pass. I am not a hero. The beauty let me pass.

45. Play hard: You can only play if you have a life. If your life is gone, what can you play?

46. The journey of exploration is not about discovering new land, but about cultivating new perspectives.

47. I didn't mean to be different, so I have to have outstanding taste.

48. How far a person can go depends on who he walks with; How good a person is depends on who gives him advice; How successful a person is depends on who he is with.

49. Sighing is the most wasteful thing, crying is the most wasteful thing.

50. A man's brain likes a woman's heart, but his eyes like her appearance.

5 1, salted fish turns over, or salted fish.

I can choose to give up, but I can't give up my choice.

As a typical loser, you are really successful.

54. Not everyone can keep a low profile. The basis of keeping a low profile is to keep a high profile at all times.

55. Women like ugly men, and don't like ugly men.

56. Our love died on this day just to give each other a chance to be reborn.

57. When the boss uses you, you are a talent, and when you are not used, you become a layoff!

58. If you fall, get up and cry again.

59. Sometimes the killer of marriage is not an affair, but time.

60. Never mention it, not because I forget it, but because I remember it.

6 1, let the future come and let the past pass.

62. Is it necessary to be big? Dinosaurs didn't go extinct as usual!

A white lie is a good excuse for your deception.

64. Parents fool their children into calling education; Children fool their parents and say that their parents are derailed; Fooling each other is called the generation gap.

65. Don't talk to me about feelings. Talking about feelings hurts money.