"Yes," I said, "the child still doesn't know what to say. Can the bean they call go to the toilet by himself? ''
The one they called Bean just learned to go to the toilet by himself last month! Grandma proudly said, you have to hurry. They all say they won't quit diapers until they are two and a half years old! Yidou's little cousin, now 4 years old, is still carrying it!
My best friend Yan 'an is deeply troubled by' toilet anxiety'. My 3-year-old daughter Amon is going to kindergarten soon, but she can't pee. She took off her daughter's diaper and forced her to sit on the pony bucket, but Amon cried and pointed at the diaper. She didn't dare to urinate until she brought a diaper. Yan' an failed several times, called me to help each other in the same boat and took the baby to the pediatric hospital.
I believe that many precious mothers have the same troubles as her. Two-or three-year-old babies can do anything but go to the toilet. Should babies be forced to quit diapers before they are two and a half years old? Let's listen to the opinion of the pediatrician.
Why do you want to quit diapers when you are about 2 years old?
Most old mothers' anxiety about going to the toilet comes from two aspects, one is the approaching time of entering the park, and the other is the goodwill persuasion of people around them. But where did the phrase "I must quit at the age of two" come from?
According to the American Academy of Pediatrics parenting guidelines, it is recommended that children should have toilet training between 18 months and 24 months. Many mothers only pay attention to this level and ignore the' eight indicators' mentioned at the back of the guide, which is a signal for children to train in the toilet. In other words, every baby's development is different. Finally, it is necessary to decide when to carry out toilet training according to personal development.
On the other hand, modern parents are busy with work, and many babies will be sent to kindergarten at the latest age of three. We generally believe that children should at least learn to go to the toilet independently before entering kindergarten. My family Dabao and Bauer also learned to go to the toilet by themselves around this stage. There was no compulsory training at that time, which was more natural. But sometimes it is used at night, especially when traveling or going out for a long time. Really quit diapers is more than 3 years old.
Toilet training has nothing to do with age, but depends on these two indicators.
A friend of mine, a pediatrician, told me that the age groups defined in the American Academy of Pediatrics' parenting guidelines are actually based on the general level of children's physical and psychological development, but each child is a different individual. Just like some people walk early and some people talk late, it is normal for an age group to have different levels of development. Deciding whether to go to toilet training with your baby is not only based on your age, but also on your child's development.
● Physiological indicators: the maturity of sphincter and nerve center.
Simple defecation actually includes a series of complex physiological reflexes for us. For babies whose bodies are not yet fully mature, it is also a gradual process. Generally speaking, at the age of 2, the child's sphincter is mature, while the central nervous system for defecation is often fully mature at the age of 3. This is why babies who have been abroad are still wearing diapers at the age of three, or babies who have learned to defecate will wet their pants and bed from time to time.
Mothers can judge whether the baby's physiology tends to be mature from whether the baby can express his intention to urinate and whether he can control urination for a period of time (taking a nap during the day without wetting the bed), and then decide whether to train.
● Psychological indicators:
Some mothers may say that my baby knows that he has to pee and can control it, but why can't he live without diapers? Babies who wear diapers to pee like their girlfriends often have psychological problems. If you want to go to the toilet independently, your baby should have these three psychological preparations.
1、? Cognition: I have a certain understanding of going to the toilet, and adults are very interested in going to the toilet.
2. Expressions and instructions: When the body feels, it can inform adults to go to the toilet and understand the instructions for sitting on the toilet.
Shame or discomfort: If your pants are wet or you have poop, you will feel uncomfortable or embarrassed.
Three ways to quit diapers
When the baby is fully prepared, the mother will start to say goodbye to the diaper. Here are three ways to help babies at all stages carry out toilet training without pressure.
Adaptive method
At the beginning of quitting diapers, most children can't control their own urine and urine. I often pee on my pants and on the floor at home. This is a normal learning process, and some treasure moms will get angry or scold their babies because their children can't control them. This will make the baby feel pressured by spontaneous defecation, but it will prolong the study time or lead to future excretion problems. Therefore, it is necessary to conform to the children's learning rules. If the child tells us where the urine is, the mother should encourage the baby, and then tell the baby to sit on the toilet or tell her immediately.
Observation method
My best friend's baby can tell her mother that she wants to pee, but she doesn't want to sit on the pony barrel. She needs to take a diaper to pee. In the face of the baby's resistance to going to the toilet, the mother can solve it through observation. In fact, it is very simple, that is, let the baby watch you go to the toilet. You can also explain that sitting in the toilet is a sign of growing up. And how to wipe your ass and flush. Buy your baby a toilet seat that can be installed on an adult toilet, and the baby will be happy to imitate it.
Similar excitation method
For children over 2 years old who have not quit diapers, play with children who have quit diapers. Where will the child's' shame' take him?
When a friend shared her Xiaobao's experience of quitting diapers, she told me that Haobo, a 3-year-old, had not gone to kindergarten and could not go to the toilet by himself. She is particularly anxious. In those months, I sat on the toilet according to my baby and let you go after urinating. As a result, the baby saw the toilet walking around and peed his pants without wearing diapers. The turning point appeared in the week when my cousin took the children to live in.
My cousin's two children are only a few months old. Haobo can go to the toilet by himself. Seeing that everyone else went to the toilet, she had to lie on her back and let her mother change diapers. She's a little embarrassed, too. After the relatives left, Haobo took the initiative to take off the diaper. After a week, he finally succeeded in bidding farewell to the diaper during the day.