"Ambition is how much I hope this will happen! ? Huang Liyan, chairman of Leo Boehner Advertising Company, is from Business Week.
"People without ambition are not enough to achieve anything; Without ambition, an enterprise cannot last long. ? A thousand years of ambition. "
Ambition is like a rope leading to heaven. I believe you can often hear the word "ambition" in your daily life, but it is not easy to explain its concept in detail! After all, what kind of behavior can be called "ambition"
Compared with those lucky people who are rich in resources and succeed all the way, ambition seems to be more suitable to describe the idea that "even in adversity, one can still hold the courage to fight and the enthusiasm for self-confidence". It is like a rope connecting hell and heaven. As long as you hold on tight and keep climbing, you can get where you want to go!
Zhong, a lecturer in emotional intelligence education at Duffel, said: "There are a group of children in this society, and their resources are relatively scarce. Maybe they don't have a good relationship with family of origin, their parents are not around, they are single parents, and even they have difficulties in their studies or interpersonal relationships. In this case, their sense of self-efficacy is usually low. Can they have the motivation to turn Gan Kun around, avoid falling and find themselves in the process of hard work? Such children can often learn more than others in the process of struggle and have a broader vision for their future! 」
Wang Hongzhe, the executive director of the Sensory Integrated Child Development Center, is a genius leader who is an ideal rather than a dream. He pointed out that ambition is the ability to set goals and implement them. Everyone has a variety of goals, but if you just think about it and don't achieve it, it's called a dream. If we move towards the goal step by step, it is an "ideal", and "ideal" is the premise of forming ambition.
The eight abilities to cultivate ambition are related to moral sense. Can you be called "ambitious" as long as you have an ideal? Mr. Zhong believes that if the goal you want to achieve is only good for yourself, not for others, and others will not give positive comments, it is not an ambition. Ambition itself should cover a certain degree of moral standards, which is not only helpful for personal development, but also enlightening and positive for others in the environment or society.
"A little difficult" can be called ambition. Teacher Wang Hongzhe believes that setting a goal that is too simple and easy to achieve is not an ambition. This goal must have a certain distance and difficulty for your current ability.
Just like climbing a mountain, the mountain you want to climb may be higher than any mountain you have climbed. You look up to the top of the mountain, not afraid, but still determined to attack the top and take a decisive step. This is a sign of ambition.
Cultivating eight abilities of ambition is the premise of cultivating ambition. The child is still young. Do you know what ambition is? I believe that dad must be more curious than mom. Many adults may not be able to show their ambitions when facing their own lives, but do naive preschool children really have the ability to cultivate so-called ambitions?
Teacher Zhong said that because ambition is a complex and difficult concept, the values and attitudes it covers are also very abstract, but the more abstract and complex it is, the longer it will take to accumulate and cultivate, starting from the time when children can walk and talk freely.
Autonomy, starting from responsibility, as I said before, an ambitious person must have a goal in life. Most importantly, this goal must be set by yourself, not assigned by others. Therefore, autonomy is also an important prerequisite for ambition.
"No, this is your own business! Teacher Zhong pointed out that children's autonomy can be cultivated by being responsible for the details of daily life. For example, there are many things that children can do by themselves, but parents often say, "Help me! "Because time is short or children are spoiled." On the contrary, perhaps these little things are just a little effort for adults, but they make children lose the concept and ability of being responsible for themselves, and make children think that all his problems will be solved as long as they are good at managing relationships or making demands or even playing tricks. At this time, you should tell your child decisively: "no, that's your own business, please find a way to be responsible for it yourself." 」
"What do you think we should do now? Many times, parents will keep saying "it's time to eat" and "it's time to take a bath" because they are worried that their children don't understand or forget. Teacher Zhong reminded that if everything is arranged too properly for children, or there are too many clear rules for children to follow, children will not grasp their own rules, or even understand "I need to help them plan things" at all. Therefore, when children forget their duties, let them have self-knowledge, which will also enhance his autonomy.
Eight abilities to cultivate ambition. Moderate expectations make children motivated. Why do children seem passive and boring in everything they do? Teacher Zhong said that in fact, parents' moderate expectations will make their children more self-motivated, but this expectation is not utilitarian and result-oriented like "you must be the first in the exam", but tends to encourage positive personality traits and attitudes, such as "I hope you are a helpful child" and "I hope you are a responsible person". As long as you persevere, these expectations will gradually form during the child's growth.
How to cultivate children's aspirations from daily life? Below, two experts and I have sorted out the eight core characteristics of "ambition" for your parents and taught you how to raise an ambitious baby step by step!
1. Self-management Teacher Wang Hongzhe believes that to cultivate children's ambitions, children must first learn to "self-manage". The so-called self-management means "the ability to arrange and take care of yourself", including the basic ability to take care of yourself and handle the immediate affairs around you.
Know yourself from life experience As mentioned above, ambition is closely related to setting personal ideals and goals. However, how can a child who has no self-care experience know his own abilities and interests? "In the process of taking children to play games, we will find that children with rich self-care experience know their own specialties and preferences, and they also know how to set challenging, suitable and achievable game goals. Teacher Zhong said to me.
What should we do?
Adults must learn to let go. Teacher Wang Hongzhe believes that parents should play a passive and prompting role in their children's self-care. When a child asks you for help, parents should not help at the first time, and only help if several attempts can't solve the difficulty. Whether dressing, wearing shoes, eating or going to the toilet, the way to help them is not to clean up all the mess, but to take 1 step.
Not seeking a perfect result. At this stage, we attach importance to "children can gain experience". Dad doesn't have to care too much about the middle process. Take eating as an example. We have to put up with children eating at sixes and sevens because the coordination between small muscles and hand-eye is not fully developed, but we still have to believe that children are born with the nature of "wanting to do things well by themselves". If you don't care too much about the imperfections in the learning process, you can see the traces of children's growing up.
Compared with parents, peers are the main imitators of children. When a child's self-management ability is weaker than that of other children of the same age, it is advisable to bring the child into a group environment and encourage the child to imitate by observing what others do. This will be much more efficient than parents and children "behind closed doors" to teach them to fly into a rage!
8 the ability to cultivate ambition 2. Self-awareness Because ambition is a concept of "knowing one's own ability and challenging it", children must have enough knowledge of themselves to produce it. From children's daily activities and games, parents need to observe their children, because the important source of "self-concept" actually comes from feedback from others. If parents can find the advantages of their children, tell them, "I find some things great about you!" And take him to do some self-awareness and discussion, and the child will have a deeper understanding of himself.
Teacher Zhong said that knowing your own strengths can help children affirm themselves, because in fact, self-confidence is not generated by doing well in all aspects, but knowing that although you have some shortcomings, you also have some expertise, so when facing your own shortcomings, you will not feel depressed or escape, but will know how to do it when you have a choice or opportunity. Give full play to your strengths and abilities in a positive way, such as "Although my math is not good, my Mandarin is very good, so although my math score is relatively low, I can take part in a composition or speech contest to make up for it." 」
What should we do?
Lead children to realize their own advantages, observe their performance while accompanying them to carry out some practical activities, and take the initiative to ask children: "Have you found what you are good at?" Because some children will compare their abilities with their brothers, sisters or adults, they are easy to feel inferior. At this time, their parents should also teach them the concepts of "everyone is good at different things" and "whether he is good or not is not necessarily defined by specific achievements". For example, "I think you are very polite, you can look people in the eye when you speak, and you are good at asking questions." I think this is also excellent. 」
Clarifying abstract praise for younger children often makes them less aware of their own advantages and disadvantages. Teacher Zhong said that when he asked the children what their advantages were in the course, they often replied, "People say I'm fine! But "good" is a very abstract word. Adults should further guide children to know where to behave well: "When will you be said to be good? "The more children know their own advantages, the easier it is to keep them.
Say the advantages first and then the disadvantages. When a child has a certain understanding of his own advantages, he should also be reminded: "Is there anything you can do better?" ",let them know that people are not only good, but also can't always expect positive comments, otherwise children may make others uncomfortable but unconsciously. When the shortcomings are not discovered by themselves, but given by others, the harm and pressure on children are usually greater.
In addition, we should also guide children to find ways to solve their own shortcomings, so as to stabilize their ambitions, instead of only finding shortcomings but not grasping the key points of solution, so that children will feel frustrated or even ignore them because they don't like to hear.
It is worth mentioning that parents in China often find fault with their children, but forget to praise their advantages. However, giving back so many shortcomings to children all day will greatly reduce their motivation. Therefore, before reminding children to improve their shortcomings, we might as well put forward the advantages of 1 and 2 children.