Some people say it is to cultivate children's study habits, but I don't agree. I think interest is really the best teacher. In high school, I got good grades in math and physics, not because I developed good habits or strong self-discipline, but because I really enjoyed the sense of accomplishment and pleasure of thinking and solving problems. The same is true of English learning. In the year abroad, my English has been greatly improved, that is, I enjoy the sense of accomplishment in communicating with people in English, and I almost forget to eat and sleep, instead of forcing myself to study, which is inefficient.
At present, the admission rate of one book in Beijing is around 70%. The wife is worried that the child will not even be admitted to high school. I'm not worried at all. As far as I remember, it was not difficult to get into high school. When the college entrance examination rate in my hometown is less than 20%, I think it is not difficult. My child is not that bad.
It's not that they are not worried, because these people have the ability to let their children take another road to Rome. Let me give you an example.
A friend, my father was admitted to a famous university in his teens, which has not yet reached high school. In the noisy years, he relied on self-study, and his IQ and EQ are self-evident. My mother is a college student, beautiful and sweet, and an announcer of state-owned enterprises. Both of them were blessed at that time, and the second generation families on both sides, Tsinghua, Peking University, Fudan University and some rattan schools, came wave after wave. My friend studied in general, and like us ordinary people, he entered an ordinary second-rate undergraduate school. He himself bluntly said that he didn't have the face to attend the family reunion for the New Year, and the name of the school was hard to say. But we should still play and sleep. In his senior year, at the request of his father, he took the postgraduate entrance examination, engaged in various operations, and entered a prestigious school under his former mentor. This man is also a high-ranking businessman. With the help of his father, he got the quota of exchange students and went to Hong Kong University to study.
It is not easy to graduate from Hong Kong University. The friend gritted his teeth and insisted. He studies from five o'clock in the morning to ten o'clock in the evening every day and graduates smoothly. A graduate student at HKU is enough to make him among the elite. He is well-informed and rich in contacts, and he will earn millions of dollars a year soon after graduation. He said that in his company, any graduate degree is enough to kill him, but he still manages well, with his father behind him and an old fox to control 100 well-known college students in the workplace. Now that his father has retired, he is rich. He bought a house and a car in first-tier cities on his own salary, and he became more and more calm and modest.
His father's assets are also tens of millions, and he earns millions himself. When he was young, he also put away his playfulness, modesty and prudence, and kept a low profile. He is just thirty years old. Do you think he has a bright future?
Achievement is only one factor. Rome is there. How do you get there? It's just that parents have that gap in knowledge and ability.
I am a teacher. According to my observation, the conclusion is that, on the contrary, parents with high academic qualifications are more worried about their children's grades.
For example, teachers' children will get better grades. Of course, teachers' academic qualifications are definitely not the highest in society, but relatively high. But teachers attach great importance to children's academic performance. Because of their professional advantages, they can keep abreast of the changes in children's academic performance and adjust their educational means and methods accordingly, so their academic performance is relatively good.
Parents have the same expectations for their children regardless of their educational background. No one can easily get good grades just by relying on high IQ without making efforts, which seems more clear to parents with high academic qualifications.
Parents with high academic qualifications know how to do a good job in family education and make their children better in their studies. Under the cultivation of highly educated parents, children have super thinking ability and self-study ability, so parents certainly don't have to worry about their children's academic performance.
According to a big data from 20 19 of Beihang University, 72% of parents have a bachelor's degree or above. Everyone knows that the admission score of Beihang University is very high, so high that candidates have to exceed 99% of the candidates in the country to be admitted to Beihang University. Visible, those top universities such as Tsinghua Peking University East China No.5 Middle School whose admission scores are still above Beihang University, the proportion of parents with high education is by no means lower than Beihang University. Does this mean that highly educated parents are the prerequisite for excellent children?
The research of American experts just shows the correctness of this answer. The author of "Parents' Language" found through a lot of family background research that the level of parents' knowledge determines the effect of children's education when they are 0 to 3 years old, which is directly related to the formation of children's brain neuron links.
Parents with high academic qualifications will find ways, including learning how to be a good parent and how to do a good parenting education. So it will provide a lot for the growth of children.
Okay, do me a favor. Most parents with low academic qualifications only give orders to their children, and discipline them with the prestige of their elders, which is not helpful to their learning methods.
The difference between Xueba and ordinary people is that Xueba has strong self-study ability, while ordinary people rely too much on the guidance of others. In reality, middle school tyrants don't have to go to cram schools to do their homework, while ordinary children can't do their homework without cram schools. Therefore, highly educated parents will not worry about their children's academic performance.
I don't know about other people's families, but my husband and wife both graduated with first-class master's degrees. Working in Shenzhen, the income is not bad. We don't worry about our children's grades because we are fully prepared. To outsiders, our family was still playing before the exam and watched TV for an hour and a half the day before the final exam. My daughter is in the fourth grade now. A few days ago, she scored in the top ten in the final exam, and the district unified exam. The teacher didn't tell us the exact figures because it was not allowed to publish the rankings. I don't think I deserve my children's grades, but the result of my accumulated training and education. Everyone says that heredity is good. I always tell my children that mom and dad and you are ordinary people, and we all need to work hard to get rewards. And efforts are not cramming for a day or two temporarily, but persistent efforts. I taught my daughter to read when she was two years old. When I was three years old, I began to contact English. I began to recite ancient poems at the age of four. At the age of five, I learned ballet. At the same time, I taught her arithmetic in life. When I was five and a half years old, I began to learn calligraphy ... after school, that knowledge became more handy. Even if the exam results are not satisfactory once in a while, I will try to make up with her and not scold the children. So, it's not that I don't care about my grades, but that I have a plan.
Are parents with high academic qualifications not too worried about their children's grades? Personally, I think so. Why?
I think the reason why parents with high academic qualifications are not too worried about their children's grades is because they pay attention to moral education, and he knows what kind of educational methods to use to train their children. Parents with high academic qualifications have a lot of knowledge and good educational methods, and they will never beat and scold their children because of a little thing. Parents with high academic qualifications are generally suitable for reasoning with their children. When children's grades are poor, they are not blindly criticized, but comforted and encouraged to improve their grades step by step. Parents with high academic qualifications will study together with their children and make progress together.
When the child is sad, when the child has problems, I believe he will also take the initiative to tell his parents about these problems, and tell them all the interesting things and difficulties in school in time. Such children can become very good friends with their parents. Such children can trust their parents very much, but we must know that it takes a lot of efforts to cultivate such a good parent-child relationship.
Coupled with the usual concern for children, as well as never scolding or hitting children, are all encouragement to children. Then I believe that children's grades will be improved step by step, and even become the first in the class and the master of the whole school.
Not all of them.
My brother graduated from Beijing Normal University and my brother-in-law graduated from Zhengzhou University. Both of them are master students. It stands to reason that their education is high enough? Genetically speaking, their children's IQ is definitely not bad! But the reality let them down.
A son broke their hearts and sent them from babbling to early education classes, regardless of tens of thousands of tuition fees a semester. Kindergarten is also the top kindergarten in the city, not to mention primary school. Teachers with high qualifications are all selected in advance, which is also a small class system. No matter how busy you are, it is a top priority for a family to accompany their children to do their homework. Children need to learn everything, and all kinds of extracurricular books and learning materials are put in the bookcase at home for fear of losing at the starting line.
But the more worried I am, the less I want to. The children grow up day by day. They are nothing but playing, let alone studying. The scores in every exam are relatively low. Later, junior high school, high school and university all paid for it, and calling home was asking for money. If you don't want money, don't call. This really makes my brother and daughter-in-law very helpless.
Is it bad heredity? Not as bad as family education? Not exactly. Don't pay attention to children's learning? Not at all. Later, the two of them gave the child a sentence, "Not for learning!"
Therefore, parents with high academic qualifications are actually more worried that their children's academic performance is not as good as their own. Those with low academic qualifications will let nature take its course, so they are not so worried.
I observed the parents of students around me and found the following points.
1. Most highly educated parents are more concerned about their children's grades. Note that the word I use here is concerned, not worried.
2. Parents with high academic qualifications have higher requirements for their children's academic performance, which seems to be a natural inheritance, good grades and a sense of superiority.
3. On the road of learning, once the children's grades are found not to meet expectations, parents with high academic qualifications will be even more puzzled, and then they will be more worried about their children's grades.
This phenomenon does exist when chatting with parents. Parents are good at things, of course, don't worry. If parents are good at learning, they can control themselves. At this time, children can guide their own education, and the problems they can solve are small problems for parents.
And if you can't solve it yourself and need to go outside for help, then at this time, you are prone to anxiety and worry.
My own education is not high, but my study is good, so I am quite sure about my children's study. What you don't understand can only be solved by spending money.
The results are temporary, and I value the children's ability more. When children have strong learning ability and motivation, it is easy to have good results if they learn properly.
Children who are most afraid of their incompetence are forced to learn by their parents. If the method is improper, children will easily get tired of learning.
Repeated defeats and repeated battles may not necessarily succeed, but we must find the reasons to change;
Repeated battles and defeats will hurt self-confidence. Who was born easy to be abused, gave up long ago.
Therefore, it is very important to know some educational principles.