"Separate child care" brings convenience to young mothers' work and life. At the same time, many simple family problems have become more and more complicated because of the conflict between grandparents and dad's parenting concepts, unsuitable living habits and different personalities. According to the survey, half of the children in today's families are brought up by their grandparents, and two-thirds of them have differences in parenting concepts and methods. Family education is an indispensable educational element for children's healthy growth. What are the advantages and disadvantages of intergenerational education? How to find a balance between happiness and conflict?
How to achieve a win-win situation in intergenerational parenting?
Text: Zhao Yingying, a researcher at the Curriculum Department of the Institute of Child Development and Family Education, Department of Education, Beijing Normal University.
With the change of family structure, family relations have also changed, and the highest "authority" endowed by ancestors with family ethics has become the "subsidiary" of nuclear small families. How do the three generations in the new changes get along and establish a new family order?
"All Aspects" of Family Structure Diversification
Lens 1:
Parents' hysteria:
Scientific parenting listens to me and stands on the side of old experience.
If you ask young parents, what drives you crazy when old people take care of their children? Nine times out of ten, they will answer that the elderly are too fond of children, overprotective and nagging. Not only do they have no scientific knowledge of parenting, but they also stubbornly refuse to communicate. Whether it is the level of cultural knowledge or the concept of parenting, parents born after 1980s and 1990s are very different from grandparents born after 1960s and 1970s. Young mothers and fathers believe in "science" and grandparents believe in "experience". In trivial parenting daily life, inconsistent understanding will inevitably lead to the accumulation and escalation of conflicts.
A mother described her relationship with her mother-in-law in the confusion of parenting like this:
"In our family, there are 100 conversations every day-'Mom, it's time for the baby to get into the habit of eating. Don't feed him, let him eat by himself! Mom, the baby is overweight now, don't give him chocolate!' Mom, it's time for the baby to cultivate concentration. Don't tease him, let him play by himself. I am grateful and angry to my mother-in-law for helping to take care of her children-she doesn't know anything about scientific parenting, and she doesn't know how to guide her children's cognitive, sports and psychological development. I don't always listen to what I say, and I don't change after listening. I'm really worried that my child will be so stupid by her! "
If the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is unfamiliar and contradictions are prominent in life, can you avoid contradictions by getting along with your own biological parents? Another mother described the daily life of grandpa and his baby like this:
"I'm going crazy! My dad actually let the children watch TV for two hours. I made it clear yesterday that they can only watch 1 hour! These days, I also heard my father chanting to his children:' Your parents spent so much money to buy you a school district, how can you be worthy of them if you don't listen!' When the children were disobedient, my father called them' selfish and greedy'. Oh, my God! How can it be used on a 4-year-old child when it is so serious! Education for children must be based on encouragement, not so discouraged. He was still angry when communicating with him. These days, it is obvious that my son has faded and his heart is bleeding. "
Lens 2:
The old man's sad tears: there is the hate of making people, things and money everywhere.
Are grandparents who "enjoy" their children around their knees happy? The answer seems vague. A limerick that once swept the circle of friends told the grievances of the old people-
"Raise the children to get married, and have dolls to watch the sun. Get up at five in the morning and wash your hands and face. Boiling and steaming the egg custard, the child is still sleeping. Look at the time and call again. It's too early to miss. The child gets up slowly and squats while playing with his mobile phone. After washing your makeup, you can eat in ten minutes. As soon as I lost my chopsticks, I turned around and said I was in a hurry to go to work. I sent the children to wash the dishes and waited for my grandchildren to wake up naturally. Grandson woke up in bed with his hands dancing and his feet pedaling. Two four-handed old people are in a hurry. "
In intergenerational parenting, grandparents (mostly grandmothers) take on the role of nanny for 24 hours after they come to their children's small homes: three meals a day, washing dishes and cleaning and purchasing the kitchen all the time. Not only that, the old people also put deep love in their children's corners-plush toys hide dust, horned building blocks are afraid of knocking, the floor will fall off if it is too hard, and they can't eat well ... The old people want to give all their love to their children and grandchildren without reservation, but sometimes this almost suffocating love also keeps parents and children away-they just want to be served and don't want to be controlled.
Lens 3:
The child is at a loss: mother and grandmother often quarrel, and father is silent.
What is the inner feeling of a child who "enjoys" dual care? The answer cannot be generalized. A first-grade pupil once sent out such a series of questions in his diary:
"The teacher taught us to be filial to our parents, but isn't grandma dad's mother? Why can mom yell at grandma? Why doesn't dad care about mom? Is it because they are adults? Then can I grow up like this? "
Family harmony and happiness is always the cornerstone of children's happy growth. Psychological research shows that if the family is often nervous or silent because of trivial matters, the child's inner sense of loss will be very strong. For children's growth, a stable and orderly family order is an important source of inner security, and it is also the first step for children to imitate and learn to obey the rules and gain a sense of inner order.
Diversification of family structure is a helpless move
It seems that it runs in the family's dilemma is that his grandparents join a small family with their children. However, from the actual demand, although there are many contradictions in helping the elderly with children, it is indeed the best option in reality.
The old man takes care of the baby, which is affordable and reassuring. According to the data of the sixth census, the average childbearing age of women in China is 29. 13 years old. Young couples around the age of 30 are in the initial stage, and generally face the pressure of buying a house or repaying a mortgage (20 19 China Birth Report shows that mortgage accounts for 44% of family income). For small families in the initial stage, the savings are relatively thin. If one of the parents (usually the mother) resigns to take care of the baby because of the arrival of the newborn, not to mention the difficulties for women to return to the workplace in a few years, just looking at the financial pressure of the father to earn money to support the family is enough to discourage mothers who are prepared to take care of the baby full-time.
For most ordinary dual-income families, either parent is faced with the dilemma of being unable to leave the workplace and being left unattended. In addition, the elder sister-in-law/full-time nanny is not only expensive but also of uneven quality. News such as "nanny pricks children" and "nursing sister gives children sleeping pills" are common in various media, which makes parents who love their children pale and ashamed to ask strangers to take care of their children.
Faced with many practical difficulties, it is indeed the most "affordable and reassuring" solution for the elderly to join a small family to take care of their children.
The contradiction between supply and demand in the current situation of child care is prominent. In 20 16, China Population and Development Research Center conducted a survey on the current situation of conservation education in Beijing, Shanghai, Guangzhou and other cities 10. The results showed that the contradiction between supply and demand of conservation education in China was prominent. Among more than 1000 mothers of babies under 3 years old interviewed, 35.8% said they needed child care, but only 4. 1% actually entered the child care institution. The reason why the contradiction between supply and demand is so severe is not only that parents generally believe that infants under 2 years old are not at ease to enter kindergartens, but also that the supply of nursery institutions is insufficient, especially the number of public nursery institutions trusted by parents is seriously insufficient.
Therefore, to some extent, relying on the elderly to take care of babies is a helpless move under the lack of infant care services in society.
Raised by generations,
Seek balance between contradiction and happiness
Children are the future, and the state and society need to provide necessary material and service guarantees for families to raise babies. The report of the 19th National Congress of the Communist Party of China listed "early childhood education" as an important content of "persisting in safeguarding and improving people's livelihood in development". Premier Li Keqiang pointed out in this year's government work report: "It is necessary to deepen the structural reform of the supply side, highlight the orientation of people's livelihood, and develop services for the aged and children's health care." Recently, the General Office of the State Council issued the Guiding Opinions on Promoting the Development of Care Services for Infants under 3 years old, which shows that the state attaches great importance to the current care services for infants and young children, and we eagerly look forward to the increasingly perfect future of care services.
Perfecting socialized child care service has a long way to go. In the process of constantly improving the nursery service, the society should also undertake the corresponding family education guidance service, "let educators receive education first" and guide young parents to study with the elderly. Scientific parenting ideas and methods need to reach the most important caregivers of children in all directions, so as to solve the family conflicts caused by the most prominent conflict of parenting ideas at present, and then create a harmonious family growth environment for children.
Interaction is a family style, and managing the family is more important than teaching children. Doing unnecessary things is bound to be self-defeating. James baldwin, a famous writer, once said, "Although children don't listen to their parents, they are very good at imitating their parents' behavior. "In the family, the way of communication between people is like the wind of nature. Although you can't see it, you can really touch it. Every member of our family, especially adults, is the creator and shaper of family style, and children are a mirror that reflects family style. Managing the family is not just a godchild, it is far more important than managing the family.
Parents who are afraid that their children are "not smart enough to become talents", when their excessive belief in "scientific parenting" permeates their children's lives, anxiety becomes a great motivation for them to control everything, especially others. Learning to see clearly and control one's own parenting anxiety is the core essence of alleviating "it is not pleasing to the eye to see the elderly with children everywhere".
Life is education, which embodies love and responsibility, starting with housework. How many parents in life, while worrying that their children will be used to being "little emperors who are not diligent in their limbs and have no grain", accept the all-round service of the elderly for their diet and life with peace of mind? How many parents complain that their children are only close to grandparents and just want to lie down and play with their mobile phones after dinner?
The old man does all the housework, leaving the children completely out of it. As we all know, the value of housework goes far beyond keeping clean. More importantly, housework can condense the sense of participation and responsibility of family members at home, and it is also the simplest way to cultivate children's self-esteem, self-confidence and self-efficacy. Children's self-esteem and self-confidence come from the real enjoyment of doing something in real life, not from the parents' mantra of "you are great". Teaching children to do housework as much as they can is to accumulate a sense of accomplishment for them in the real world.
Sharing housework is the truest filial piety to the elderly. Not only children, but also every family member needs to experience a sense of accomplishment, dedication and participation in housework.
Let the elderly participate in the growth of children with a positive attitude.
It runs in the family. It's very cultured.
A family composed of old and young is the most natural environment, the most reasonable unit and the most complete structure. Living in harmony in the family is actually an opportunity to educate and benefit from each other.
This runs in the family and benefits all three parties.
Enhance ancestors' sense of meaning in life. For the elderly, living with children and grandchildren will bring more happiness, security and self-worth, which will have a positive impact on their mental health. According to the statistics of National Health Commission, by the end of 20 19, there were 254 million elderly people over 60, 654.38+200 million empty nesters and 30 million elderly people living alone, many of whom died unexpectedly, suffered from depression and even committed suicide. The world of the elderly is not only helpless because of the deterioration of physical function, but also the loneliness behind the intelligent age. Its operation in the family not only increases the opportunities for the elderly to get in touch with new things and renew their ideas, but also strengthens their positive emotions and enriches their spiritual life. Moreover, their diet, daily life and health can be taken care of and improved, and their living standards can be improved.
Enrich the emotional cognition of children and grandchildren. For children, the life of a family of many has more experience, stimulation, communication and interaction than that of a family of three. Parents' excellent family style of respecting their ancestors and caring for their children and grandchildren is the best family education for their children and a moral character that can be passed down from generation to generation. In the process of educating children to respect, care and accompany the elderly, it is also to cultivate children's sense of gratitude and rules. This kind of multiple roles and identities is beneficial to a person's future social development, and can effectively avoid unhealthy physical and mental problems such as psychological deficiency and emotional desert.
This is the result of family inheritance and tripartite efforts.
In order to maximize the synergistic effect of "it runs in the family", it needs the mutual cooperation and understanding of three generations, and the support and efforts of individuals, families and society.
Personally, I think we should do our job and respect each other. As grandparents, we should consciously update our educational concepts and living habits, understand the reasons and ideas of the new generation to make decisions, and respect the opinions of young parents in educating their children with an open psychological attitude. As young parents, we should learn to cherish the "old treasures" at home, be grateful and tolerant of the old ideas and practices of the elderly, and try our best to plan living space and coordinate living habits for the elderly. On educational issues, explain and communicate in time to establish healthy family relationships for children. As children, they act as lubricants for grandparents and parents, inherit filial piety and fine family style, and inject vitality into the family in the operation of it in the family.
From the family, pay attention to the role and reasonable division of labor. Family is a complete system. Only by clarifying the individual's "rights, responsibilities and interests" and establishing a good role order can the tutorial system operate efficiently. With regard to children's educational dominance, parents are always the first responsible person, so we should try our best to avoid long-term separation from children, so as not to affect the establishment of normal attachment relationship. Grandparents should play the role of auxiliary care, take proper care of grandchildren, and put an end to the "helicopter-style" parenting model of doting and over-consideration. When young parents encounter differences in educational ideas, they should humbly communicate with the elderly the principles of family education, unify educational standards, and avoid the emergence of children's speculative psychology and family conflicts.
It is a wonderful experience for three generations to have the opportunity to travel together for life. Dealing with the "up-down relationship" in the family, reserving differences is different from the diaphragm, caring is different from interference, so that three generations can understand each other in intimate relationships, care for each other physically and emotionally, and achieve mutual harmony without difference. Form a healthy and positive three-generation educational atmosphere in society and truly give play to the multiple effects of multi-family
With the development of the times, mothers of each era will express their love for their children in different ways ... In the pluralistic atmosphere of society, looking back, what is the gap between the love for mothers after 60, 70 and 80?
Mother after 60 Keywords: traditional hard work and strict food and clothing
This generation is a traditional generation, and people's thoughts and behaviors are unified, so in the process of parenting, most people are also influenced by this traditional thought.
After listening to my mother's story about the past.
At that time, there were many children at home, so there were many things. My parents-in-law helped this family but couldn't help that one.
At that time, the family was poor, it should be said that the whole society was not rich and personal nutrition could not keep up. After the full moon, the children go to work immediately. Raising children and going to work, coupled with malnutrition, make yourself a yellow-faced woman. The family's economic conditions are not rich, and they simply can't afford a nanny. They must do all the work by themselves. I have to go to work during the day, and all the housework is basically done at night or on rest days, so there is little time for real rest.
When children are young, they just need to eat and wear warm clothes. The awareness of children's education is also very weak. On the one hand, we don't know much about ourselves, on the other hand, it may be caused by the big environment at that time.
At that time, everyone was rushing to eat and wear warm clothes, and there was no money or time to think about how to raise children. Moreover, there were no training courses and other teaching places at that time, and tutoring was not popular. Therefore, even if we want to raise children, there is no such environment.
At that time, in the eyes of parents, elders were always elders and children were always children. There are some things that children don't understand at all. There is no need to tell him! At that time, we always had the dignity of a parent. The child is a little afraid to tell us anything, and he doesn't want to tell us anything in his heart, and we won't take the initiative to communicate with him. So now the child's personality is a bit introverted.
At that time, mothers were very traditional and strict with their children. For example, if there is something delicious, give it to the elderly first; Guests go home for dinner, and children can't serve; Be sure to greet your parents when you go out and enter the door. These habits are actually good for their current work, study and life. After all, no matter how this society develops, it needs some rules and regulations, and traditional virtues cannot and cannot be blocked!
Mother after 70 Keywords: freedom of communication, happiness and respect
This generation has accepted many new ideas. As mothers, they will inject more new things into their children's education through their own life experiences and comparisons.
After listening to 70' s mother's new concept of parenting.
My daughter has absolute freedom. I let her choose what she likes to do and let her have fun. Everyone wants to be happy. I can't experience it well myself, but I will try my best to make my children happy every day.
I actually think very simply, I will be a friend of my children, and I want to be a very gentle and understanding mother, which can give my children a very relaxed and happy growth space. He and I should be equal, and he can discuss any problem with me.
My mother is a kind and simple person, but she doesn't understand me. When I was a child, I liked singing. Every time I come home from music class, I sing to my mother excitedly, but they always joke that I sing out of tune. At that time, they wouldn't realize that children's self-esteem was actually very strong, so I stopped singing. I wouldn't do this to my son. Even if he really doesn't do well, I will encourage him to continue his efforts.
My parents believe that there is a dutiful son under the stick, and they don't like that I always talk to my children in a consultative tone. In my opinion, beating and scolding children is a sign of parents' incompetence. My son was not afraid of being beaten since he was a child. If he does something wrong, we will hold a small seminar to let him speak his mind until he can tell who is right and who is wrong. At this time, he will basically take it orally.
Compared with the previous generation, the post-70s mothers know how to respect their children and give them a broader and more free space because of their own life experiences. They regard themselves as children's playmates and become useful friends who tell their worries; They attach importance to the cultivation of children's various abilities, do not put too much pressure on children, and let them make choices according to their own interests.
Post-80s mother Keywords: the only child's fashion education is unknown.
As the first generation of the one-child policy in China, they are pampered and pampered. As young mothers, they may still stay in the eyes of others when they were young, and may have a more fashionable view on parenting.
Look at the post-80s mom's fashion parenting.
Science trumps experience. Mrs. Chen just got married when she attended the nanny training last year and is preparing to have a baby. She and her husband are both only children, and neither of them is good at housework, let alone such a complicated job as taking care of children. So she took time to sign up for this training class. Unlike other students who plan to become professional baby nurses in the future, she just wants to learn to be a qualified mother.
Comments: More than 90% of the students in the qualified parents training class of East China Normal University are only children. There are also many mothers in the certificate class of children's psychological counseling and potential development. Compared with the parenting experience handed down from generation to generation by parents, the post-80s generation may have mastered a lot of scientific parenting knowledge. Internet, professional magazines, parents' training classes and lunar new year are all their rich and scientific sources of parenting knowledge. It's just that the post-80s generation can reach a certain level in theory, but in the eyes of their parents, it's more just that their eyes are superior than their eyes.
Investment EQ is better than investment IQ. When the child was only one and a half years old, Mr. Lu reported the remedial class to the child. This class is not to learn piano or go, but to let children play games. All-English foreign teachers, two or three children together, the price of a 40-minute class is about 150 yuan, and there are many children in class. According to Teacher Lu, this is called EQ investment. When he was a child, his parents naturally paid attention to academic performance, but they didn't care much about personal character development and social skills. In his view, a person's communication skills and emotional intelligence are far more important than test scores and IQ. Children should learn to get along with others from an early age, be good at integrating into groups, and cultivate their social skills from an early age.
Comments: Emotional intelligence, for teacher Lu's parents, this word seems a bit strange. At that time, it was their wish to let children eat well and learn well. However, all kinds of training for children have increased now. Emotional intelligence, potential and thinking training ... can be described as varied. According to a person from an early education center in Shanghai, except for the middle class with good income and some foreigners, many of them are young people who are more willing to invest in emotional intelligence for their children.
It is better to be happy alone than with others. When Xixi was five months old, Xixi's mother began to serialize Xixi's Wonderful Life on her parenting blog. Xixi's mother thinks that for herself, the writing process of parenting blog is also the growth process of young parents. On the internet, there will always be other enthusiastic parents to answer the questions raised. The child is sick, the child needs to buy new clothes and go to kindergarten ... there will always be someone there to point out the maze, and the network can easily narrow the distance. For a stay-at-home mom like Sisima, online parenting communication is an important way to keep her in touch with the society.
Comments: The network changes life, and the network naturally changes people's concept of parenting. Compared with the generation of parents who exchanged their parenting experience by letter, telephone or face to face, the post-80s generation now has more convenient conditions. It doesn't matter if they don't have much experience, they can ask for advice modestly. This is also the reason why the number of parenting blogs and parenting websites has soared.
Most of the only-child mothers in this generation lack psychological preparation for the role change of their children's parents, which is manifested in their failure to take good care of their children in life. On the other hand, compared with the mothers born after 60 and 70, they are more educated, impacted by more new ideas through various media, and their parenting concepts are more fashionable. New media, professional books and the experience taught by elders have become the three magic weapons for single mothers to raise their children.
I think it is very reliable to say that there is a generation gap in three years. If you are more than three years older than yourself, you will find it difficult to communicate.
What's more, it's more than twenty or even thirty years.
I was born in 1989. Let me compare the growing environment between my parents and me.
My parents were born in the early 1960s, and there was more than one child in the family. At that time, just after three years of natural disasters, there was a shortage of materials. When they went to school, they just caught up with the Cultural Revolution. Fortunately, it's a tail. My mother was admitted to a technical secondary school. After graduation, she was assigned a good job and her life was bright. My father retired as a soldier and worked with my mother in an enterprise. As a result, everyone got off work and started a small business, barely supporting me to graduate from college.
I, an only child, and my classmates in primary school, junior high school and senior high school are basically only children. I was born in the late 1980s and grew up in the era of reform and opening up. When I was a child, there was no computer network or anything. After graduation, I worked for two years, with a laptop, a smart phone, an IPAD and everything. Network information is pouring in every day.
After all, people are gregarious animals, and the influence of the overall social environment on you finally makes you.
Parents grew up in an era of material scarcity, and there were many children at home. They watched us get what they dreamed of all those years, and naturally felt that we were a happy generation, and children also had their troubles, which made them spoiled and restricted by all their parents. Parents think that we have paid so much for you, and you are so happy, why don't you listen, while children think that you can limit me too much.
This system is very important to parents. Those who are laid off will be compared with their peers who are still in the system. The strong contrast makes them firmly believe that you must go to college and enter the system. Children's views on this society come from after the reform and opening up. Mercantilism has a much greater impact on them than the system. There are advantages within the system and a vast sky outside the system. Everyone has his own opinion.
Parents' information sources are very narrow. When they were young, they could only listen to the radio. It was the hottest time of the red sun. Later, with TV, they relied on TV to get most information from the outside world. Children/kloc-learn to surf the internet only when they are over 0/0 years old. At first, they may just play games. Later, they found that there was a lot of information on the Internet that could not be obtained on TV. Adolescent rebellion, eager for others' affirmation of themselves, long-term high-ranking adults are so ignorant, and their ideological influence is once again reflected.
Parents think that they have many years of social experience and life experience, and they will suffer if they don't listen to the old man. Children think you are all old-fashioned, outdated things. Old people's experience and strength, children's youth and rebellion, the role of hormones, the pressure of life, heavy studies and the same depressed mood make them refuse to communicate. Even if they want to communicate, they end up quarreling, which deepens the already deep generation gap.
Until the children began to get married and realize the feeling of being parents, they did have many childish places at that time. Their parents' salt and salt for so many years are not free. Parents have also seen the great changes in this world, and they have also changed a lot. Many of the children's views are right; However, the generation gap cannot be bridged. Maybe only the Spring Festival can be together every year. Parents still like to watch the Spring Festival party, and children may brush Weibo or play games with various electronic devices.
After all, people are social animals. The most obvious example is that people who were raised by wolves as children eventually became wolf children and lived like wolves. No matter how old you are, everything you come into contact with when you grow up will affect you.
I often think that I have reached the age of my parents. What would it be like if I had children? I was really embarrassed when I was a child. haha
Seeing that "Grandma's 280,000 pension was taken away by her granddaughter 18 years old, and150,000 was given to her boyfriend, the other party said," Couples spend money normally "and" Online friends first date more than 20,000 hot pot women: he took advantage of me and escaped ",two unrelated incidents, the protagonists of extravagance and waste are both post-90s and post-00s, which inevitably have mixed feelings.
In order to please her boyfriend who has been in love for three months, she stole grandma's life savings. Two people ate more than 20 thousand at a big meal. This kind of spending other people's money is not painful. Although it is only an extreme case, the hidden new generation of consumerism has touched the sensitive nerves of society. No wonder the news is followed by bad reviews!
In the event, what people see is profligate youth, that is, spending in advance and overdrawing beyond their own economic ability, losing the tradition of thrift for thousands of years.
Their living habits and consumption concepts are completely different from those of their parents and grandparents who came from the era of shortage economy, or even completely opposite.
The generation created after 60s and 70s is rich and thrifty, while the new generation created after 90s and 00s spends a lot of money, but it is these two generations who live under the same roof, and the intergenerational inheritance of wealth deduces many thrilling intergenerational conflicts.
Many parents find that the speed of earning money can't keep up with their children's desire to spend money, and the price of limiting their children's spending quota may be a usury bill that is difficult to repay.
Due to historical coincidence, China, born in the 1960s and 1970s, ushered in the golden opportunity of reform and opening up and gained more social wealth. In a sense, it has become the lucky dog of the times.
Happier than they are, their descendants, with the deep brand of their own generation, grew up in the stage of the explosion of social wealth, enjoying the accumulation of life of two or three generations, and did not know the taste of hunger since childhood. Some people are even born with golden keys. They don't feel poverty personally, but they don't understand the hardships of creating wealth, but they are eager to upgrade the consumption wave.
After 60 s and 70 s raised 90 s and 00 s, when the children grow up, many people may find that the children are not what they expected, and even have the feeling of raising a baiwenhang.
I have come into contact with some peers who are worried about their children. When children grow up, they can't work with peace of mind. Some are idle and addicted to the internet. Most of the communication with parents is just asking for money, and I am too worried about my parents' nagging. Even if they get the money, they will black their parents.
Communicating with business owners feels that it is difficult to manage the new generation at present. Young people quit when they are slightly unhappy. After the probation period, they are old employees. Enterprises are recruiting people all year round. They are facing the miserable post-90s and post-00s, and they are just an old ox who can support five or six people.
This kind of post-90 s and post-00 s doesn't like to work, but prefers to start a business on the shoulders of their parents. Just like the son of the famous richest man, he has been restricted from spending many times after his business failure, which has poured cold water on the entrepreneurial enthusiasm of the new generation.
There are as many middle-aged parents who are overdrawn by their children as there are extravagant children. Many vicissitudes of life are better than buying a house and emptying six wallets.
When the post-60s and post-70s look forward to the post-90s and post-00s, many people may eventually find that one generation has stolen the fruits of another generation's life and despised the old-fashioned meanness of that generation, and that person from hope to disappointment is himself.