After reading it, parents' anxiety about educational competition can be alleviated, and children can have an objective and rational understanding of cram schools, remedial classes, math competitions, physics competitions, art, singing, musical instrument playing, dancing and so on.
Original link:/s/2ze _ xc48bnux5c1h 51a
Content excerpt:
1, the top of the sea of clouds: teacher, there is a saying that children should not be allowed to lose at the starting line. What do you think of this sentence?
Peng Xiaoxi: Teacher, my child is more than two years younger than yours, and it is also a boy, so I hope the teacher can talk about the views of parents who report to extracurricular classes crazily. I am in Haidian District, Beijing, and I am already very anxious. Thank you very much.
There is a word called "theater effect", which means that the people in front of the theater are so excited that they stand up and watch, but the people behind them can't see it, so they have to stand up and watch. Finally, the whole theater stood up and watched the program that could have been watched while sitting.
The current educational arms race is such a "theater effect", and the country began to rectify cram schools, which is essentially the reason.
We generally have a way of thinking about problems, that is, the ability to jump out of this matter and trace back to the source.
When we talk about the arms race in children's education, we should go back to what children's education is for, and then talk about the arms race.
What is the overall purpose of providing quality education for children? Is it to let children acquire the so-called knowledge in books?
Now which parent can do the problem better than your senior three? Besides the teacher, which institution pays you a monthly salary because you can do the problem?
That knowledge is obviously not the most important thing.
What does the country want you to learn that knowledge for?
1, through the process of learning these knowledge, cultivate their own thinking ability of independent thinking and problem solving. 2, screening, screening children at different levels.
For example, when children step into society, they will find that many jobs can be done by individuals, but why do you want to do them?
He is a doctoral student and you are a high school student. What can you say?
This is the fairest and the social contradictions are smaller.
The most essential core of exam-oriented education in China is fairness.
In the case of limited higher education resources provided by the state, the "not bad children" in all families such as 369 will be screened out and given a higher platform to prevent future social stratification.
At present, there are two reasons for the state to crack down on make-up classes:
1, the total social cost has increased, and everyone has invested a lot of time, energy and money, but the children have not become better.
Believe me, getting 95 points for exam-oriented education, 100 points, will not improve children in essence, but the price is huge.
More importantly, after the child reaches the age of 18, such a huge and expensive "score maintenance cost" in the previous 12 years cannot be carried to the next life stage.
Going to college is a new law of life, and everything about exam-oriented education should be pushed back.
As the society becomes unfair, it will become more and more difficult for poor families to appear.
Originally, the reason why the college entrance examination set scores was to give consideration to fairness to the greatest extent.
Nowadays, remedial classes are becoming more and more professional. Some children can improve their grades through money, but children who don't have money to go to remedial classes usually don't know how to educate, so they can only rely on their own efforts and exploration.
How hard do children from poor families have to work to get through all kinds of armed rich families?
Of course, this society can never be fair, but at the national level, it is really bad for the macro future of the country, so it must be braked and rectified.
After analyzing these, we can simply know two concepts:
1,/kloc-The education of children before the age of 0/8 is called "limited games".
It is a fair screening mechanism set by the state, which is essentially to maintain the long-term operation of the state machine and prevent social stratification. It's all about grades.
This set of rules is specially set!
At any moment, the specially set rules are designed to achieve one goal, that is, to screen you out.
This means that all the accumulation made under this rule, except the threshold for entering the university, usually can't be brought to the next stage of your life, and the points will be cleared.
2./kloc-the education of children after 0/8 years old is called "infinite game".
No one will give you any specific scores, and there will be no exams to distinguish between 369 and 369.
Your life is your test paper, and the test is whether you can get ahead in this society without clear rules.
Every parent and friend asks himself, is it important for children to have a strong "limited game"? Or is the ability of "unlimited games" important?
Of course, children make choices, and I hope all adults. Then the next question is coming. Do you really have the ability to want it all?
If your family's annual income is10 million, it's not much, just10 million. You can spend 500,000 to 600,000 yuan a year to outsource all your children's education and growth, and the quality is very high.
The question is, are there many such families?
So our question is how to balance how much money and energy children should invest in "limited games" before the age of 65,438+08, and how to cultivate their future "unlimited games" ability before the age of 65,438+08.
If you want your child to truly become your pride in the future, you must recognize one essence: while ensuring that your child will not fall behind on the track of "limited game", you must pay great attention to your child's "infinite game" ability, which is the most critical ability to determine his life!
What do parents need to provide their children with the ability to play unlimited games?
1, the interest and ability of lifelong continuous learning.
2, the ability to properly handle all kinds of interpersonal relationships.
3. The ability to stand up bravely against pressure and failure.
Basically, all success in life is a combination of the above three.
Liu Bang, for example, never read any books in his life, but he, together with Sean, Xiao He and Han Xin, learned to die after the revolution. Schleswig-Holstein never read a book since he was a child, but he listened to books every day and studied it all his life.
No cow is not good at learning, and no cow stops learning for life.
Most failures and stagnation are essentially giving up lifelong learning and promotion.
Both Liu Bang and Schleswig-Holstein are great gods of interpersonal relationship and have the ability to unite the broadest masses of the people. Both of them have experienced too many narrow escapes and pushed back.
Unfortunately, an important point of "unlimited education" seems to run counter to the education of "limited games".
1, "limited game" is to force you to get impeccable scores on a limited track. To tell the truth, this is a considerable blow to your interest in learning.
My daughter-in-law is the second in high school, and the proper person won, but she hasn't read a book since she graduated from college.
2. "Limited games" instill more competition in you and decide whether you go to bed or not, which greatly affects children's understanding of interpersonal relationships.
In fact, there are too many times in life when we need to integrate the strength of others, but there are too few children in this society who can get help from nobles everywhere.
3. "Limited games" will make you attach great importance to every gain and loss, and will make you obsessed with the scores of the college entrance examination. The most terrible result of "one roll for life" is to make children feel that they can't afford to lose from an early age.
Children can't stand failure, and it's hard to get up after failure.
The most crucial point when we consider the education "arms race" is how to strike a balance between the two and let children win at the starting line of "unlimited games"!
This is the most critical!
This will also help you understand whether early education, horse riding, musical instruments, golf and extra-curricular language classes are so necessary for every family.
If those remedial classes can help children develop interest and the ability to resist setbacks when family conditions permit, then it is a good choice to go to that class.
If children have a strong resistance to those classes, or parents let their children go to those classes because they are anxious about education and afraid that their children will fall behind, it is meaningless.
Not to mention that those remedial classes will put the cart before the horse if they affect the quality of family life.
It is far more important to take your child to a movie every weekend and have a high-quality meal with him outside than to let him go to a remedial class that he is not interested in.
Most parents think that sending their children to a prestigious school has completed the educational task, and the rest is up to you.
In fact, parents' education for their children should be continuous and lifelong, and the focus should also be on how children can better stand in this society in the future.
We should pass on our understanding and experience of life from generation to generation, instead of telling our children what to do after they are admitted to college. So my personal suggestions for "educational armament" are as follows (not necessarily correct, for reference only):
1, it is enough to ensure that children do not fall behind in academic performance, there is no need to worry too much, and at the same time invest too much energy and money in comparison.
You should pay more attention to investing in your own growth and success. (It will be analyzed in detail later)
All learning should focus on stimulating his interest as much as possible, and let him do what he likes from an early age, instead of forcing him to do what you want him to do.
3. If there are many children participating in sports and activities, be sure to sign them up to create a high-frequency and intensive communication environment for their social interaction. When you come back, ask him social problems and questions, and talk to him.
4, be sure to let the child taste all kinds of small failures, but you should try to be present and tell and guide him to stand up again and again.
Letting a child fail does not mean that he has no dignity. He must be guided normally. Let children know a concept from an early age: the so-called "failure" and "success" are both probabilities. We can only make the probability bigger or smaller, but we can't eliminate it. The only way to succeed is to keep working hard, and then multiply the probability.
Speaking of which, it's not over. In fact, the latter paragraph is our core today.
The best education for children is that you become his role model, and you let him know the meaning of success and happiness through your life's role model.
We let children learn all their lives, and we let them be interested in and explore things. What do we do by ourselves?
What else are we interested in now? Are we improving ourselves every year?
We want our children to become popular little aristocrats in interpersonal relationships, but what about ourselves? Does everyone like us? Isn't it unpleasant to see many people every day?
We hope that children will not worry about failure and face setbacks bravely. What about our own? Are we really not timid in the face of difficulties? ...
1. When we find our interest in life, our life will shine brightly, and children will know how wonderful it is to pursue interest and lifelong learning. It can also guide children how to better maintain interest and lifelong learning in the future.
When we become a noble person, we have scarce energy, warm atmosphere, decent speech and empathy for others. Children will naturally know what a noble person is like, and we will know how to guide him when we discipline him in the future.
We won't be angry about anything ourselves. Everything is the probability of avoiding disadvantages and not coming back. Children naturally know that it is a process to deal with problems.
The most important thing is that sentence, because you have walked that road and you know how to guide him.
Everything you say has power.
Many parents don't listen to their children. Essentially, the child refuses to accept you.
Why are you not satisfied?
Parents are imagining what the so-called "right" way is, but it is not. Children are the smartest elves in the world.
Finally, make a summary:
1. While investing in exam-oriented education, we should pay attention to the cultivation of three key abilities: the interest in lifelong learning, the health of interpersonal relationship and the return of failure and frustration.
When the two conflict, the latter is more important. (Not necessarily right, I made it myself)
2. If you want to change the world, change yourself first.
3. If we can't become dragons ourselves, don't force our children to carp yue longmen; Even if we become dragons, dragons have nine sons, but the sons are different.
Small wealth depends on diligence, middle wealth depends on virtue, and great wealth depends on life.
Everyone has his own script, so don't be too persistent.
As parents, we are tour guides. Be kind to yourself and your children.