My present situation

I got married and had children very early, and I took a picture of graduation photo's belly on her back two days before giving birth. I still remember that on the day of delivery, the doctor of obstetrics and gynecology told me that people in our line of work had no time to accompany their children. I thought to myself, I can never do this. I have to adjust myself and find a balance. But it turns out that it is really difficult.

? When my child was two months old, I began to participate in the standardized training of national residents, which means that I have been in the hospital for 33 months without interruption, all year round. I had just entered the first year of research at that time. I make rounds every morning and take an hour's bus to another campus for classes at noon. So my life is in a trance every morning and sleepy every afternoon. We study three times a week. I'm trying to keep up with everyone. But my body and energy are completely crushed.

Many occupations are very tiring, and so are doctors. The particularity of doctors is that they must be very careful, because we are responsible for our own lives. I have been in the emergency department for three months, and I am available 24 hours a day. Like a gyro, you should receive medical treatment and save patients. No matter how tired you are, saving patients should be as clear-headed as fighting chicken blood. I lost ten kilograms in the emergency department for three months. In severe cases, it is a 48-hour continuous rotation, with a day off in the middle, and it is also busy from morning till night. In severe cases, there is little time to accompany the children. Like many doctors and mothers, it is my regret that I can't sleep with them. Once, in order not to let my mother work too hard, I slept with my children, got up at night, and was absent-minded and tired the next day, and was severely scolded by my superiors. At that time, I felt that I was not a good mother and couldn't do anything well. I began to blame myself. I should have another baby when economic conditions permit, or I should have another baby when I am on leave during lactation. I think it's unfair to my children now. From the birth of the child to March this year, I basically wanted to change the state of raising children, but there was nothing I could do. My parenting style is relatively simple. I sing children's songs or sharpen my ears in English and read picture books. I really want to work hard, but I can't.

Second, life changes when it meets small steps.

Until March this year, we moved to a place close to the hospital. I spend more time with my children than before, but the problem is coming. How should I accompany them?

? At this time, I saw the promotion of Xiaobu on the official account of WeChat. Bao Yun's mother is also a working mother, and when she changes her workplace, she will also take her children with her. There are ten minutes of games, core courses and memorabilia punching in the app. All this surprised me very much. I found more ways to accompany my child, not just singing a song or watching TV with him.

I once told my husband that I felt that I was not good enough, and I was afraid that my growth would not match my children. My husband said that we would grow up with our children, so I was very excited when I heard Bao Yun's mother say that she would be a growing parent. In my mind, Bao Yun's mother is a model of working mother.

In these nine months, I have been growing up with Xiaobu, from core courses to reading clubs, picture books, concert halls, and then to Xiaobu University, which I like. Let me share with you the main ways I get along with children now.

When the child wakes up:

1. Core course. The games in the core class are very systematic, and life is full of teaching AIDS. Even if you get sticks and leaves, you can play with Dou Bao in the community for a long time, which also attracts other children to join us. According to the baby's age, push this week's game every Friday, and disassemble it every day after playing for a period of time. In this way, you can do things every day and achieve your goals every day, so you won't feel that you have nothing to do when you are with your children every day. My family is funny, especially like the game of monkeys fishing for the moon. Once, after playing for half an hour, he was still reluctant to let go. In the end, he couldn't lift his hand, or he didn't give up, which laid a very good foundation for him to eat independently now.

2. Insist on reading picture books. Parent-child reading is the most important form. I will urge my grandmother to study when I am away, but people are not machines and life is not gears. Sometimes I am tired, or my child is sick and depressed, so I will relax and play games. In the past, buying picture books was the top seller in Taobao and Dangdang. Later, I saw the picture book library of Xiaobu University, which has a very detailed reading list, which can be comprehensively analyzed according to the baby's age, cognition and stage, and then choose to buy.

After the child falls asleep:

1. Small step university. Human nature is laziness. It is very anti-human to like to give children to preschool classes, schools and parents so that parents can learn to clock in. However, I like learning new knowledge very much. The knowledge in the university is systematic and clear at a glance. It is super love, super health, primary school bully and so on. There are also excellent notes from various parents. I study their notes and reflect on my own shortcomings, drawing on and absorbing the educational ideas and methods of excellent parents. Learning needs repetition and feedback in order to form long-term memory and explore knowledge continuously.

2. Small step reading club. Mr. Tang Ge, the founder of the Small Step Reading Club, gave a very good analysis and explanation of 24 educational books. By studying parents' discussion, I can accurately understand the key points of each book and extend them continuously, which is a great improvement for me. Especially the article about immature parents, maturity is the best gift for children. I deeply think so, because I have been urging myself to be a growing parent. Theoretical basic knowledge is the cornerstone, and if you want to carry out scientific parenting more effectively, you must have a lot of knowledge as the background and supplement.

3. blackboard newspaper. This is my killer. Dou Bao likes Spider-Man, so I drew a crappy Spider-Man and bought a Spider-Man overalls. Every time he sees a new blackboard newspaper, he will point to it with special excitement. I believe that when he saw the painting, he must have thought that his mother loved him.

4. teach grandma. This is a very huge project, but it has benefited a lot after completion. My mother is very attentive to raising children, but whenever she has time, she collapses on the sofa and enjoys herself. She has always believed that raising us can be done well without early education. I don't argue. Half a month ago, I opened my own small lecture hall, and joined hands with Chinese parasol mother (Chinese parasol mother is the awesome mother I will introduce to you later! ) I bought graded reading to give my grandmother an English class, let her study with bean treasures, and secretly put pressure on her. In fact, raising children is the same as seeing a doctor. The better the curative effect, the higher the patient's compliance. As funny Bao gets smarter, grandma listens to me more and more. My English enlightenment sharing will be shared at the study meeting next month.

Three experiences after meeting a small step:

1. Family is the most important. I have experienced a lot this year. Three times, I saw my sister in the hospital resign and go home to take care of the children. No matter how busy the teachers in the emergency department are, they still try to create time to accompany their children. Some doctors are cruel to themselves and their children. I also saw life and death, joys and sorrows in the hospital. Some people just make money and lose their lives. Some people shout their children's names before they die. Some people do it by themselves, but they have no family to accompany them. Except for life and death, it is a small matter. Family is the person you should put first, and nothing else matters.

2.*** Love. Not only for children, but also for husbands, mothers and even patients, I will try my best to understand them, communicate more, communicate more and give more feedback. This is a small step for me, and I benefit the most.

There is a passage in Keigo Higashino's "Red Finger" that inspires me a lot, to the effect that it is unfair for some people not to accompany their children when they are young, but to expect these children to provide for their old age when they are old.

I want to fight for my career. When I can't accompany him, I will study hard and create conditions to accompany him. I hope he can have his ideals, his career and his dreams when I am old, but I want him to try his best to understand me, understand me and care about me.

? Thank you for letting me know what my goal is to raise a child. I don't want him to be a child prodigy. No matter what occupation he is engaged in, I hope he can become a useful person to society.

I hope to work with more parents to create a better living environment for the next generation.

? My sharing is over, thank you for meeting a small step, thank you for meeting you.

? If parents have their own feelings and experiences, talk with each other, learn from each other and absorb useful knowledge, grow and progress together, and set a good example for their children.