When I was pregnant for a few months, my husband was sent abroad by the company. He was a little confused. I saw that he hesitated, so I decided to let him go directly. I thought it didn't matter if he wasn't here.
One month before the due date, my mother came to accompany me. The implication is that I want to go back to my hometown to have children, saying that I have acquaintances in the hospital, but I refused. First, my city is a provincial capital city, and the medical conditions are far superior to our hometown; In another hometown, there is a custom that I can't have a confinement at my mother's house, so if I go back to my hometown to have a baby, I have to stay in the hospital for a month, and it's annoying to think about it. My mother also lied to me about my childhood. My parents live in the same neighborhood as my parents. She works in a university in Wuhan and her husband is from Wuhan. After giving birth, she went back to her hometown. I don't know what to think. She was born a few months before me, and stayed in the hospital for a month before going back to her mother's house to continue her life.
Facts have proved that my decision is correct. I was admitted to the hospital until the expected date of delivery was still quiet. The last time I did B-ultrasound, I said it was occipital posterior position, and there was a great possibility of dystocia. The doctor advised me to try raw first, and then cut it. I looked it up online and decided to cut it directly so as not to suffer another crime. The technique of the provincial maternity and child doctor is really good, and the incision is well sewn. After growing up, it is basically invisible, and the child's umbilical cord is also well handled.
A few years later, my cousin gave birth, and menstruation asked her to go back to her hometown to give birth. My cousin and I are in the same city. The child had hydrocephalus before the prenatal examination and didn't want to give up. But I really don't understand, after all, why do you want to go back to life? After the child was born, the doctor in my hometown couldn't handle it. The ambulance sent the child to the provincial women and children, so my cousin was in my hometown hospital and the child was in Zhengzhou. This month is like this.
More than 40 days after I gave birth, my uncle drove us back to my hometown and continued to do confinement. My mother is going to do it for two months. I am only responsible for breast-feeding the children, and I am not responsible for anything else. It's really carefree In my hometown, there are many people who help to take care of my baby. During the day, my parents and my aunt, after work, my sister, my sister-in-law and my brother also joined in the fun. Other relatives, such as my uncle and aunt, often come here.
In this way, I still have a slight postpartum depression, which I didn't know at that time. Later, I analyzed that maybe I was spoiled and grew up. As a mother, I feel that this little man is my responsibility from now on. The psychological pressure is a little big, and my teammates are not there. I'm responsible for his part, too. I can't stand it. As long as the child is a little troubled, I will collapse first. On the second day of that year, because there were many people, the children were very excited. I didn't sleep when I should, and I was very distressed. I finally went to bed. My sister insisted on hugging her, but I wouldn't let her. My sister insisted on hugging her, which woke her up. I broke down again and cried. After my mood gradually calmed down, I heard my uncle say whether to take me to see a psychiatrist. Later, my little brother came to tell me about his experience in raising three children, and I remembered a sentence: the vitality of children is very tenacious.
In those months at my mother's house, it was because of the careful care and intimate companionship of my family that my children grew up healthily, and I slowly smiled. With so many relatives, what am I afraid of? So it doesn't matter whether there is this custom or not. It's really important to have family company.
This is also the custom here. We went to grandma's house in the second month. But there is no rule that you must go back that day. Special circumstances are special! You can tell mom that the baby is not feeling well now, and it will be fine when the baby is better. I am still a month old, and I will definitely go back when I go back. As for the baby crying, it's not easy to coax. I can stay with everything for a few more days. The same is true, after all, the baby should cry or cry.
I didn't know this at first, but my mother-in-law mentioned it. Then she was scolded by my husband, which means that there are many things, and the child is so young that he can't go out. It's not worthwhile to toss something wrong. My home is a little far, too. It's an hour's drive. I don't want to toss. And it didn't move. Mother-in-law explained that it has been done for a month, and they can clean up here when they go out. Husband continues to refuse, do you still want to go out and clean up? Just finished cleaning one room, and two girls are in the other room. I didn't go out anyway. He found that there were many customs when the child was born, so he didn't plan to follow her, lest there be more things in the future.
I've been there. It should be some local customs. I'm from out of town. On the first day of confinement, my mother-in-law led me to my husband's grandmother's house.
At that time, grandma prepared a small bowl and spoon for the baby and stayed at grandma's house for one night that night.
There is also a custom in my husband's hometown that guests rest in other people's homes and husband and wife sleep in separate beds. At that time, I was a novice mother who knew nothing. I have to take care of the children alone at night.
So I especially don't like spending the night at other people's homes, but it's a local custom and I can't help it. Since then, I have been particularly afraid of spending the night at other people's homes.
I don't know what this custom is. Do you have any customs or customs that are particularly annoying after finishing the month? Let's talk.
I'm @ jingjingjingjingjingjingjing, a family tutor who focuses on children's psychological education and early childhood education. Welcome attention.
Sometimes custom is custom. I don't know why and when, but it is usually handed down from the older generation. There is nothing wrong with observing those customs that have beautiful meanings, do not violate science and do not involve feudal superstitions. If there are customs that are not implemented for subjective and objective reasons, it is nothing. After all, custom is not a law and must be observed.
We also had the custom of going back to my parents' house for a period of time in the second month. Some places are called Nuosaowo [covering my face], which I think is quite good.
First, novice mothers can go back to their parents' home to relax. Generally, the mother-in-law is in charge of confinement in her husband's family, who adds more food and imports. Naturally, she takes care of her mother and baby wholeheartedly, but there will be places where she is not used to being considerate, and her mother-in-law and mother will be tired. When you go back to your parents' home, where you grew up, you will be taken care of by your parents, and you will be familiar with your living habits and temper, and you will naturally relax.
Second, mother-in-law can take a short rest. It's very tiring to wait on people next month. We should not only take care of the daily life of the parturient, but also take care of the baby and wash diapers. My mother-in-law can't eat well and sleep well. She is very tired after a month and needs a rest.
Take the baby back to her mother's house, let her see the newborn baby and think about family happiness.
It doesn't matter if you can't go for objective reasons. Again, custom is not a law and need not be enforced.
In fact, you don't have to go to grandma's house when you are out of the month. This is just a custom. Because there is a strong smell of milk in the room during confinement, staying in an environment all the time will make you feel bad, and novice mothers are still a little flustered and more agitated about their children. So going to the grandmother's house is also a way to relax and let her relatives see the children.
After the full moon of the newborn, the bride's family takes her daughter and grandson back to the house for three to five days, commonly known as "moving to the nest". The reason is that adults and children share the same room for a month, and the child has grown up after the full moon and can contact the outside world. Take this opportunity to let relatives and friends meet the children.
A place, a custom, according to their actual situation, is inconvenient and does not need to go back.
Well, it depends on your manners and customs. We will go to grandma's house in the second month, and I will go in the second month. The problem is that our family of three stayed at my mother's house for more than a month before coming back! Who does this depend on?
This custom also exists in our hometown.
It is said that the baby's full moon is good for the baby's growth and development. You don't have to go back to your parents' house. If it is inconvenient, you can take your child to a relative's house for a while. Anyway, I just walked out of my house and went to someone else's house.
When there is no full moon, the bride's family won't let her daughter take her grandson back, not for a day. After the full moon, it can be postponed for a few days, and the parents will personally take their daughter's grandson back to her family.
I gave birth to a daughter, and my mother-in-law didn't help me much. The rice is clear as water, and the steamed bread is hairy. I also quarreled with my husband and felt that I couldn't stay for a day. Let my mother pick me up. My mother said no, of course, I didn't say anything bad about my husband's family, just that I was not used to it and wanted to go home. Mainly for fear of parents' worry. My daughter is 2 1 birthday, and my mother will pick me up on the 20th of the next month. My mother says 20 is a full moon. After the full moon, you can take it back to your mother's house. You can stay at your mother's house indefinitely and go back to your husband's house at any time.
When I gave birth to my son. My husband stayed at home for 20 days, and my mother went to my house to take care of the baby for the next ten days, and immediately returned to her family at the full moon.
I think it's because I didn't get good care at my husband's house when I went back to my mother's house at the full moon. I am in a bad mood and miss my mother! If the husband's family is better than the mother's family, you can stay at the husband's family. As for the sliding door, it is ok to move to anyone's house, as long as they allow it.
It is the mother-in-law who doesn't take care of your children.