1, superstition is very heavy

An old woman said that her grandson was short of gold, so she immediately took off her gold ring and put it in her child's mouth. The three-month-old child swallowed it at once and almost lost his life.

There is also a grandmother who is very happy with her new grandson. According to custom, children should bathe with money. Results The child's skin was severely allergic, covered with red pimples and kept crying. In this case, grandma doesn't feel anything wrong.

Step 2 force children to eat

The old idea is that children are white and fat. Old people always want their children to have a big hug, so they are used to feeding and even running after them.

When some children don't want to eat, the old people threaten them, coax them with snacks, threaten them with words like "If you don't eat, I'll let the police take you away", and seduce them with cartoons ... In fact, the more they are forced, the more they reject eating, which also leads to their bad habits of eating snacks and watching TV.

3, chasing children to eat

On the playground, when the child was having a great time, the old man put a fruit in his mouth while he was not looking. In the eyes of the elderly: only at this time, children will not easily resist, and if one is stuffed, the children will eat one. Eat one, even one.

Did the old man do the right thing? In fact, this little gesture can easily undermine the development of children's attention. Why do some children have poor attention at school? In fact, it has something to do with the "being disturbed" bit by bit when he was a child.

4. Dress children with lots of clothes

Old people are afraid of the cold, so they are used to wearing a lot of clothes for their children. Children are pure yang and are not afraid of cold unless they are born weak. In this way, when children exercise, it is easy to sweat, and the sweat is cold. Children who are hot and cold are more likely to get sick.

5. Encourage children to lie

My daughter has a sweet taste on her mouth, so my mother asked, have you eaten sugar? She thought about it and said, yes. Then grandpa rushed out and said, you traitor, I told you not to tell your mother, so you told your mother.

Mother knows that she can't have a conflict with the old man, so she has to suppress her emotions and say to her children: Tell her the truth. If she eats, she will eat. She won't let you eat?

The next day, the child ate candy again. When the mother asked again, the daughter wondered for a long time and thought about it. Did I eat or not? She doesn't know how he should answer.

On the one hand, the child is afraid that his grandfather will scold him as a traitor, and on the other hand, he is afraid that his mother will worry. You see, children are born diplomats, so many parents find that children can read words and observe emotions. They will see what their grandparents allow, and if their parents don't allow them, they will go to their grandparents instead.

6. Restrict children's exploration

Old people often tell children to run slowly and not to fall. After a year and a half, in fact, grandparents often don't pay attention, and the child is gone. So the old man was afraid: I just wanted to hold him.

What happens when you often hold your baby? Once a child can walk, he doesn't want to go. He always wants to be held by an adult. Children will also form a sense of not daring to take risks. If there is danger ahead, it is better to stay with grandma. It's easy to raise timid children.

7. Play TV loudly

Some old people have hearing loss, and they always talk too loudly to their children. They are used to turning up the TV when watching TV. Children are very sensitive to sound. I often remind Ma Bao not to listen to music too loudly. In the long run, it will damage children's hearing.

8. Give children unlimited snacks.

When a child cries, he gives all kinds of sugar, soda and snacks, and loves his children to the point of freedom. Old people don't know what food additives are, and they don't know that snacks are harmful to children's health, and they don't know that additives can damage children's brains.

9. "substitute" children to do things

Mom asked: Baby, where did you play today?

Then grandma said that we went to the small park today.

Mom didn't say a word, and then asked, which child did you see today?

Grandma said: Who did we meet?

For another example, children like to help their mothers with food before eating, and the old people at home are very worried that their jobs will fall. Generally, children are brought up after the old people take over.

These behaviors actually reduce the opportunities for children to learn by themselves, and have an impact on children's language development and the development of motor coordination ability.

10, help children get dressed

Many children are five or six years old. They don't know how to tie their shoelaces and can't wear clothes. The old man said that the children and adults needed help, or that the children were not dressed correctly. Going out will make people laugh at adults for not doing their duty.

But in fact, there is a process for children to learn to dress and wear shoes. If they make more mistakes, they will slowly correct themselves. At first, let the baby stretch his left hand and right hand. You can help him put it on, correct what he did wrong and praise what he did right. Always help children wear them. Children have no chance to make mistakes and correct them, so naturally they won't.

1 1, the elderly lack vitality.

Nowadays, in big cities, the elderly in many families are older. Because young people in big cities spend more and more time getting married and having children, and spend less time with their children after work. These old people who lack vitality take care of their children and have little physical contact with them, which easily leads to the lack of children's sense of security. The contact between the mother's skin and the baby's skin is the basis for the baby to establish a sense of security.

Such children will not actively communicate with others when they grow up, and they don't know how to communicate with others. They tend to be introverted and even depressed.

12, accountability for children's falling tables.

The child hit the table and fell. The old man quickly picked up the crying child. "Hit it, the table is not good, hit the baby, hit it ..." Is this parenting or harmful? This kind of teaching allows children to distinguish right from wrong. When they grow up, they often blame their mistakes and faults on the objective environment or others. Such children are not good at self-summary and correction, and will eventually become self-deception.

13, cheating on children

"You eat this bowl of rice, grandma will take you to buy sugar later", "You go to bed, and grandpa will take you to the park tomorrow" ... As a result, the children ate happily and went to bed, but grandparents deliberately forgot their promise, or simply said "I'll buy it for you next time" and "I'll take you to play next time". Children also have self-esteem, and they will be suspicious if they are cheated more.

Second, expert dialysis: 1 1 Matters needing attention for the elderly with children

1, don't let children crawl around because they are afraid of danger, and imprison them in bed or car. As long as you pay attention to protection, nothing will happen.

2, don't always hold the child, let the child get in touch with nature, do more outdoor activities, at least 1 hour every day.

3, don't do everything, let the child do what he can.

4. If there are conceptual conflicts between the two generations, we should communicate more and don't stick to our own opinions. Old people can read more books and periodicals on modern parenting, get in touch with some new ideas and methods of parenting, and improve their scientific level of parenting.

5. Usually, more communication and exchange of parenting experience can also make up for the lack of "intergenerational education".

6. Don't use psychological compensation to raise grandchildren just because you don't meet your children's needs.

7. Children's parents limit their children's affairs, and elders should not intervene and try to be consistent with their parents.

8. Avoid indulging children's habit of eating snacks.

9, the child's taste should be relatively light, avoid cooking with your own taste, let the child eat too salty.

10, don't always wear too many clothes for children, which will affect their sports ability and resistance.

1 1, don't buy things to please children, otherwise it is easy for children to form the bad habit of bargaining and rolling with adults.

Iii. 10 Suggestions for grandparents to take care of their children

When you take your child to grandparents' home, you must communicate more and give your child some advice. Don't worry!

No. 1: It is recommended to let the baby crawl as much as possible.

When the old people saw what the children were doing, they tightened their nerves and were very nervous. Seeing the baby crawling on the ground, I quickly put him on the bed and put him in the car to prevent the baby from walking around worrying about bumping. If we restrict our baby's activities so much, he will be unhappy.

Seeing this excessive nervous behavior, my mother can't help but sigh: Is it necessary to exaggerate?

Therefore, if you see this situation, your mother can explain the benefits of baby crawling to the old people.

When the baby crawls, his head and neck are raised, his chest and abdomen are off the ground, and his body weight is supported by his limbs, which exercises the muscles of his chest, abdomen, back and limbs, promotes the growth of bones, and creates a good foundation for standing and walking in the future. In addition, crawling is an intense activity for children and consumes a lot of energy. According to the measurement, crawling consumes twice as much energy as sitting and lying down, which will help children eat more and sleep better, thus promoting the growth and development of the body.

So many benefits are better than others doing fitness, so why not let the baby enjoy crawling? As long as you pay attention to protection, it is generally safe.

After explaining many benefits, the old people are of course willing to let the baby crawl.

Second: Go out and try to protect your baby from the sun.

Look, the sunshine outside is so bright and the air outside is so fresh.

How happy the children outside are. They saw such a beautiful scene, which baby did not move and which grandfather did not move, so grandpa and grandson went out happily.

However, when going out and going home, the elderly always neglect to give the baby sun protection. The baby's skin is still immature, and prolonged exposure to the sun will affect the baby's skin.

Therefore, mothers can remind the elderly to do a good job of sun protection for their babies. For example, if you choose a good time to go out, parents may wish to suggest that the time for grandparents to do outdoor activities should be adjusted according to the changes of seasons, and summer can be before 10 am and after 4 pm; Spring and autumn can be from 9 am to 3 pm. When they play, they can choose to stay in the shade. Of course, an umbrella or a covered cart is also an essential sunscreen weapon.

Third: euphemistically remind, don't chew up the food and feed it to the baby (to put it bluntly, the old man is also good for the children ~)

Some old people chew food to feed their babies before they have teeth, thinking that they can straighten their teeth.

Swallowing is actually very unsanitary.

There are many bacteria and viruses in the mouth of adults. Chewing and feeding can easily make children sick, because adults have stronger resistance than babies. Some pathogenic bacteria may not get sick when exposed to adults, but babies are likely to suffer from various diseases after exposure. The news often reports that we must pay attention to this situation. In addition, because the chewed food is very fine, children can swallow it without chewing. Over time, the baby's chewing ability is not exercised, resulting in abnormal development of teeth, masticatory muscles and mandible. Chewing and feeding is also not conducive to children's digestion and absorption. Chewing food by children can stimulate the secretion of saliva and gastric juice, which is beneficial to the chemical digestion of food.

Mothers only need to explain the disadvantages of chewing and feeding to the elderly, and I believe they can understand and feed their babies in a hygienic way.

Fourth: supplement modern parenting knowledge, even those who have experienced it should be recharged.

In the whole process of raising children, the elderly have dealt with many problems in children's growth, witnessed and participated in the whole process of one or several children from birth to adulthood, and accumulated rich parenting experience. Although some experiences are out of date, the lessons of ancestors have a great effect on children's health and morality. A person with children may have a deep feeling of being at a loss and in a hurry, which is exactly what the elderly can make up for.

Therefore, the responsibility of taking care of the baby is handed over to grandparents, who can make use of traditional old experience and learn new parenting experience, so it will be more convenient to take care of the baby. In fact, parents can communicate with the elderly and tell them more about the experiences of young parents. Of course, parents can also subscribe to some popular modern parenting books and show them to grandparents at home. Now that the internet is developed, so many early education materials shared in my space can be downloaded to the elderly (pay attention to early education materials WeChat: lixinping2000 to share early education materials! ), let them contact with some new parenting ideas and methods, improve their scientific parenting level, and also make up for the shortage of "intergenerational education".

Fifth: Don't spoil your grandson too much and refuse psychological compensation.

Because of the living conditions in those years, some old people can't provide their children with rich material conditions and adequate care, so they will have a kind of psychological compensation and want to compensate their grandchildren at once, which will easily drown their love. Therefore, when taking care of children, grandparents should still grasp the principle of moderation, praise the praise, criticize the reform, and treat the material needs of children rationally.

Sixth: Mom and Dad should keep pace with the elderly.

Mingming's mother advised her grandmother not to give candy to her baby, but after her mother went to work, her grandmother finally "surrendered" and handed over the candy. I believe mom and dad have seen a lot of this scene. Mom and dad certainly hope that the old man can stand on the United front with himself, but the old man is soft-hearted and is often shaken by the baby's two words of advice. This is a headache for many parents.

Is there no solution?

In fact, if parents can spend more time communicating with the elderly, let them know some latest educational ideas, share educational stories and vivid cases, and gradually influence them, so that their minds will be filled with more educational strategies suitable for modern children. At the same time, we should also use stories or cases to talk about the influence of doting on children's life happiness. However, the premise is that mom and dad don't want to change them, but share them with the elderly and influence them. I'm sure they will change.

Seventh: For the sake of baby's health, refuse junk snacks.

Many old people are afraid of starving their babies, so once the baby calls for snacks, of course, they will follow the instructions of the children. It's just that children love to eat those "junk food", and the old man has to say it when he scatters it. In fact, it is understandable for children to eat snacks, but some junk snacks are absolutely rejected. Therefore, it is advisable to post a "snack blacklist" at home, so that the baby can know what to give and what not to eat when he is greedy next time.

So which snacks are blacklisted?

The list is as follows: 1, fried food; 2. canned food; 3. Pickled food; 4. Processed meat food (ham sausage, etc.). ); 5. Fat meat and animal offal food; 6. Cream products; 7. instant noodles; 8. Barbecue food; 9. Frozen dessert; 10, preserved fruit, preserved plum, and preserved fruit.

No.8: Still for health, resolutely resist heavy taste.

Some grandparents like to eat heavy taste, so it also affects the baby from the diet. In fact, whether children or the elderly, the diet should be light, which is healthier.

The baby should develop the habit of feeding boiled water in the neonatal period, and can't give sugar water. Try not to drink fruit juice after 6 months, and eat fruit instead. Within 6 months of the baby's birth, there should be no salt in the food, and then it will gradually increase, and it will not be close to the taste of adults until the age of 3. For babies who already have taste preferences, they should be patient and slowly corrected, such as gradually reducing the taste of food, making light food more interesting, eating with other babies, and creating a good eating environment.

Grandparents' dietary role models are very strong.

Ninth: Don't dress children too much.

I believe many people have seen old people take their children out, and the children are covered with many clothes. They look bloated, love to run and jump, and suddenly they are sweating. Some old people will put too many clothes on little BB for fear of catching a cold.

In fact, the body temperature of normal babies and adults is the same, but the function of the baby's body temperature regulation center is not perfect, and its ability to regulate overheating and supercooling is poor. Therefore, it is enough for healthy babies to wear more than adults, and it is enough for those with poor physical fitness to wear L or 2 pieces more than adults. There is no need to wear too much.

Phase 10: let the baby sleep properly during the day.

I believe that many mothers will have such troubles: the elderly always don't let their babies sleep during the day, even if they sleep during the day, it is not good to sleep at night. In the eyes of most mothers, babies should be allowed to sleep whenever they want during the day, and sleep more to grow up.

Mom's opinion is half right. In fact, proper sleep during the day can be used as a supplement to insomnia at night, which is conducive to their growth and development. Taking a nap is a good way.

In fact, grandmothers don't need to be afraid that sleeping too much during the day will affect their sleep at night, because they can help their babies control their sleep time. After the baby is one and a half years old, he can only take a nap during the day, usually in the afternoon, and sleep for 2 hours. At the same time, ensure that the baby has more than 4 hours of waking time from waking up from a nap to sleeping at night, which does not affect sleeping at night.