Many parents will find that when their children are about 3 years old, they are very persistent in their own ideas and often do not cooperate with their parents' discipline. Some parents will do something drastic about this, thinking that this is because children are disobedient and must be strictly disciplined. But is this simple and rude education really suitable for children at this stage? Obviously not. When the child is about 3 years old, his self-awareness begins to stand out and he is eager to express his thoughts. At this time, the strong intervention of parents is obviously not conducive to the development of children's self-awareness. In fact, the paranoid behavior of children in this period is a manifestation of "stubborn and sensitive period".
First, what is the "stubborn sensitive period"? About 1. 3 years old is a "stubborn and sensitive period" for children.
During this period, children's behavior expression is particularly stubborn, and when things don't match their imagination, they will show particularly strong resistance. When the child is 3 years old, this kind of performance is very obvious, and the setting of self-concept is very persistent, and there are often emotional expressions of crying.
2. It is often accompanied by the formation of a sense of order.
Children's inner sense of order is very obvious, because children at this stage are often accompanied by the emergence and development of a sense of order. Children's thinking has its own logic, which is beyond the control of adults and can not be corrected by strong educational concepts. Children will feel helpless when their sense of order is destroyed.
3. The child's initial resistance period
At this stage, in order to maintain inner order, children begin to have resistance. Sometimes even in order to resist, children do not consider whether their insistence is correct, and at the same time, children are more eager to establish environmental order, and often turn a deaf ear to their parents' discipline or sing the opposite tune.
It can be seen that this sensitive period is a necessary stage for children to grow up. Children's ideas begin to emerge and form, and children are more willing to express their ideas and behave more rebellious. At this time, the parents' imperative education method is completely useless, because many times children will choose to "do the opposite" and "do the opposite".
Second, how is the child's "stubbornness" formed? 1. Children are eager to express their ideas.
Compared with the previous growth stage, children are no longer willing to cooperate with their parents' guidance and absolutely obey their parents' education. Children hope that their ideas can be expressed and realized. This inner desire to express makes children seem too persistent.
2. Children are exposed to different environmental changes.
At this stage, children's contact environment changes are more complex and diverse, and their learning ability is enhanced. On this basis, children's views on things are richer, and they are not satisfied with hearing from their parents, but are more willing to gain new experiences through their own exploration and attempts. Therefore, children are unwilling to cooperate with their parents' control.
I am eager to get more attention.
Children's independent individual consciousness is more and more obvious, and children hope that their behavior expression can be paid attention to. This kind of attention gives children a sense of existence. At the same time, the desire for attention also stimulates the child's desire to express. At this time, parents will think that children love to be brave.
It can be said that although during this period, children's behavior will be somewhat rebellious and parental discipline will be more difficult to implement, it is a happy thing for children's growth. Children's thinking ability, behavior ability and personality characteristics have been improved to varying degrees. Children are no longer "good babies", but more thoughtful.
Third, parents should learn to deal with the special situation in the "special" period. They should be principled and flexible.
This sensitive period is a great test of parents' parenting skills. Parents need to teach their children a certain sense of rules, but at the same time, they should not restrict their children too much. So it is a difficult process for parents' educational level. Cultivating children's awareness of rules requires parents to stress principles, but in order not to impose too many restrictions on children, parents need to be flexible.
2. The imperative tone is not as good as letting children choose more.
For example, parents want their children to eat more fruits, and the child's answer is often "no!" However, if the parent's question is "Son, do you want to eat apples or pears?" Children usually make choices, their ideas are respected and their parents' goals are realized. Letting children make more choices can make them feel respected, and children usually give clear answers.
3. Stay rational and understand your child's emotions.
Many times, parents are impatient with their children's stubbornness, and their emotions are easily infected, which interferes with their educational ideas, covers up the original intention of education, and is easy to vent their emotions. When parents keep calm, children's ideas can be understood and accepted by parents.
4. Establish a clear reward and punishment system.
Regulating children's words and deeds through rewards can usually get children's timely response. The reward and punishment system can make children understand the right and wrong of the behavior itself. Avoiding wrong behavior will strengthen the impression of reward behavior. Let children understand that crying will not make their ideas successful, and may lead to more serious punishment.
When parents are troubled by their children's stubbornness and ignorance, they may wish to look at it from another angle. The "stubborn and sensitive period" is also an important stage of children's growth, which proves that children's abilities in all aspects will be improved to a certain extent. Grasping this sensitive period, resourceful parents can make their children grow up quickly and form good habits.