Feng Menglong said: "Those who achieve great things will fight for a hundred years, and they will not fight for a sigh of relief."

For decades of life, if you have to struggle for everything, I am afraid you will live in trouble every day.

And those who achieve great things and live a free and easy life often don't care about small things and only look at the long term.

A person's state is often influenced by mood.

Living in care and worry all day, decisions and choices will also be affected.

The reality is always what you strive for and what you lose.

It often happens around you:

A mother, worried about her child's poor study and being cheated, kept an eye on her and gave face-to-face guidance.

What children eat, what they wear, who they associate with, and so on, everything should be asked in detail.

Finally, instead of developing in a safe and promising direction, children make the parent-child relationship more and more tense.

A girl, who loves a boy very much, has gone through many tests and finally got together with that boy.

To this end, girls especially cherish the time with boys.

The more you care about getting, the more you are afraid of losing.

At first, girls cared about everything about boys and asked questions everywhere.

The boy is unhappy, she wants to get to the bottom of it, and she can't see that the boy wants some space and is quiet.

When the boys were different, she began to wonder whether the boys met other girls and whether they still had her in their hearts.

Thus, care becomes control, and love becomes constraint.

The boy finally couldn't stand it, couldn't breathe, and broke up with the girl.

Read this sentence:

People you care about torture you more often.

Holding a handful of sand in your hand, the sand will hardly leak out when you are happy. When we gradually hold your palm, the sand will leak out of your fingers faster and faster until there is only a little left in your hand.

The relationship between people, too far away, the feelings are getting weaker and weaker, too close, and the feelings will also destroy each other's boundaries invisibly, making love go astray.

The best way to handle a relationship well, or to achieve something, is to do your best and have the least hope.

In the relationship, don't be demanding results, feel more about the specific process of giving, and less about expectations and hopes.

When you want to achieve something, put all your energy into it and do what you can.

When you are engaged in the present, you are no longer demanding results, and it may be easier to get a good result.

It is not difficult to find that in life, the more people who like fighting, the easier they are to get tired, and it is difficult to feel the happiness of life.

In life, they are full of "mental fatigue" of fighting and robbing.

Zhang Yun has been a stay-at-home mom for 15 years, and she "involved 15 years".

Since the child took root in the stomach, she insisted on listening to music, telling stories and doing prenatal education.

After birth, in strict accordance with the template of scientific parenting, talk to children, sing to children, and walk. The knowledge points echoed in children's ears are hundred family names, three-character classics, 300 Tang poems and so on.

After reaching the age of early education, she began to take her children to run training. Children follow her, sometimes even taking lunch on the road.

After entering primary school, the days are even tighter, not lack of money, but extreme lack of time.

She has no life at all, and all her focus is on the children. Almost all her friends have lost contact, and the only person who can talk to her is her parents who are also "implicated".

Under her education, the children are really great. English, French, piano, dancing, study, etc. They all belong to the bullying level and are properly "other people's children."

Even if the child is second, she feels wrong.

However, after entering high school, the child began to resist, no longer obeyed Zhang Yun's arrangement, and asked her to turn left. She insisted on turning right, talking and doing things, and every pore revealed her own opinions.

Zhang Yun couldn't figure out why things had come to this. She has worked hard for more than ten years, devoting time, energy, money and even the feelings of husband and wife. Why did the child treat her like this?

There is no denying that it is impossible to hit anyone when a pie falls from the sky, and all the gains must be made through hard work.

As we all know, the purpose of educating children is to make them feel the sunshine and have the ability to live independently in the world.

Parents' "involution" seems to only involve children in the struggle for fame and fortune, but in fact it deprives children of their right to self-growth.

From the perspective of parents, taking children to "fight" is also a kind of kidnapping for themselves.

It limits their time and energy, and in the end, it also imprisons their relationship with children.

If you like fame and fortune, you must control your words and deeds extremely;

If you like winning or losing, you will compare with many people horizontally.

If you like to distinguish right from wrong, you will offend many people invisibly.

Struggle, in the end, what you lose is yourself.

Some things need to be exhausted to get, and even if you get them, you can't have them for long.

For example:

Like a person, the other person's feeling for you is just so-so, but you think that as long as you try your best to be nice to him, he will look at you with special respect and start to fall in love with you.

In fact, true love never needs any humbleness, and the feelings exchanged for humbleness have long been divorced from the original intention of love.

I especially want to do a project, but there are several people competing with you. At this time, if you pay too much attention to the results of this project, you will not have this project in mind, only how to win the competition.

To this end, you are likely to take some ways to harm others and benefit yourself. Finally, even if you get what you want, you lose the trust of customers and the friendship between teams.

When you are discussing something, you try your best to prove that your point of view is the most reasonable, win everyone, but lose the love of others.

In life, many things are not absolutely right or wrong, but everyone has different ideas and positions.

Struggle, in the end, the biggest loss is yourself.

In this life, we have to fight for everything, there are too many things to fight for.

Everything likes to argue. I'm afraid in the end, nothing can be won.

Because people's mood and energy are limited, the more they like fighting, the easier it is to push.

More importantly, lovers have argued for right and wrong and lost their feelings; Between parents and children, they won for a while, but lost their parent-child relationship; Between friends, face wins, relationship loses.

In this world, we need a normal heart, pay attention to people and things, pay sincerely, don't ask about the future, just seek peace of mind.

Some things, some people, cannot be compared.

People always have to know who they are fighting with, and in the end, they will lose.

Only by not arguing can we really win.

About the author: Xiaomi mother. Multi-platform signing author, female inspirational writer. Appreciate the feelings of the world and interpret the world.