A child's violent temper is not necessarily spoiled. Children always need the care of their families. The world of children is clear and gentle. Solving the problem is to clear the way for children's development, and all parents should pay attention to it. Share with you that a child's temper is not necessarily a pet.

A child's temper is not necessarily spoiled. 1 1, a helpless mother returned to the top.

Dear Teacher Xinxin:

My baby always has a big temper, and everything depends on him. If things don't go his way, he will make a scene until all the family members compromise. It was the same when I was at school. I was called to school several times by my teacher because he hit people, or grabbed toys with children and pushed others.

On one occasion, more seriously, he bit all the children. I have to apologize to my parents, which is really embarrassing. Will the baby continue like this? I am really worried that he will become a bully in the future, and no one will play with him anymore.

Helpless mother

Teacher Xin Xin's reply:

Faced with such a problem, the first reaction of many parents and teachers is that their children are spoiled. It must be his parents who follow him with everything. As long as he keeps making noise, his parents will satisfy him unprincipled, which makes him arrogant, so it is not surprising that children become bullies at home and school.

But some parents will say that they are not used to their children at home, and they will stick to their principles even if their children are noisy at home. If the child makes a lot of trouble, they will hit him again.

But the child's temper is still very grumpy, he can't communicate, and even throws things and toys. Therefore, a child born with a hot temper is not necessarily spoiled.

2. The secret of parent-child interaction can be traced back to the top.

Generally, children with hot temper are impatient and stick to their own ideas. When others think differently from him, or when he is in a hurry, it is the most direct and effective way for him to start work, and "biting with his mouth" is the most direct instinctive reaction.

When other children robbed him of his toys, it made him feel threatened and he began to do so. Especially when children's expressive ability and reaction ability are not as fast as their own thinking speed, or when the way of family discipline is also beating and cursing, such children are more likely to be bullied.

Secret recipe of parent-child interaction

For such a "bully", it is best not to use imperative words such as "no" and "no" to reason with him; You can use words of encouragement: the baby is doing very well! Great progress this time! Words of encouragement like this are the spiritual motivation to stimulate children's excellent performance.

Because as soon as things happen, he loses his mind impulsively. After you ask him if he can hit people, he will tell you, "You shouldn't hit people." He knows all this, but he can't control his temper. It's impossible for him to reason alone. In daily life, we should do some parent-child interaction to adjust his behavior according to his personality characteristics.

Reasoning exercise

For children who use violence because they are not good at expressing, we can let them practice how to express their thoughts quickly and clearly, and tell their true thoughts first. For example, if he insists on buying a toy, he will make a scene if he doesn't buy it. At this time, parents should guide him to tell the reasons for buying toys, and what reasons can persuade parents to buy them.

3. Let children learn to wait for the top.

Of course, this training method will be a little difficult at first, so it should be used in conjunction with the following other methods. Parents should also make modest concessions, and when he can tell a certain truth, he must satisfy his ideas. But if he wants to buy by cheating, parents can ignore it at this time. In the long run, the child's expression ability and way of thinking will be greatly improved and changed, because he knows that reasoning is also a good way to solve things.

Learn to wait

The most important thing for impatient children to learn is "waiting". In the process of training children to wait, they can think more about opportunities and learn how to control their impulsive behavior. Once, the child came to me angrily to express his opinion, and I began to count slowly, from one to ten. In the meantime, no matter what he said or did, I will still count myself until I finish counting, and then listen to him carefully.

When he knew this rule, he couldn't wait to express it every time. I asked him to count first and then count to ten. In fact, the process of counting is a waiting process, which can divert the child's attention and make him less excited; In the process of waiting, he can also adjust what he wants to say, which also exercises his expressive ability.

Spatial transformation and environmental change

If the child is in a bad mood, the most effective way is to get rid of the status quo. Take him away from the noisy environment, change to a quieter environment, and then calm his emotions, such as giving him a hug, and then patiently listen to his explanation and understand his thoughts after he calms down.

4. Don't go back to the top violently.

Whether at home or at school, if there is a conflict between children, the best way is to separate two people and let them stay in different environments. The premise is not to let the child feel that he is locked in another room because of punishment, so that he is emotionally unacceptable and will only make more noise. Wait until he calms down and makes sense, otherwise it will only add fuel to the fire and make him more unreasonable.

Don't fight violence with violence.

Sometimes, because children are unreasonable, parents can't stand emotional outbursts and even can't help hitting their children. Remind parents not to use violence to solve problems, which will only make children follow suit. When he gets along with other children, if he can't solve the problem with words, he will solve it with his hands.

Expert introduction: Liu Yuxin

Since 199 1, I have been engaged in parent-child early education for more than 20 years, from front-line teachers to directors, and then to lecturers who have trained many teachers and parents. At present, he is the host of Xinxin Parent-child Club, holding various parent-child activities for families. At the same time, he is a long-term invited expert in the "Baby Family" column of Shanghai Haha Children's Channel, the host of the "Love Question and Answer" column of the early education website, and a columnist of many domestic maternal and child magazines.

A child with a bad temper is not necessarily a pet. 2 How to educate a child with a bad temper?

1. When children don't listen to their parents' advice or refuse to obey orders, they can get themselves into trouble. When he is frustrated, he will naturally know why his parents won't let him do it. The sooner this treatment is completed, the better.

2. Going through the "resistance period" is a necessary stage for children's normal development. At this stage, parents should pay attention to appropriately encouraging their children's behavior and promoting the formation of their self-awareness. When you are dissatisfied with your child's behavior, you should express your love for him while criticizing him, and don't blame and scold him.

3. When children have bad behaviors of beating and cursing, we should resolutely stop them. Let him understand the impact of his wrong behavior on others, explain the truth seriously, and guide the child to take remedial measures consciously.

When parents find their children unhappy, they should try to understand the reasons. Appropriate requirements can be met, and excessive requirements can be ignored.

What are the reasons for children's bad temper?

1, parents' bad temper sets a bad example for their children. Parents have a bad temper and often beat their children for a trifle.

2. Improper family education and excessive psychological depression. Parents' education methods are not uniform, and children are prone to lose their temper with the disadvantaged.

3. Children don't express their wishes. Because children's language is still in the development stage, sometimes they can't clearly express their thoughts, demands and wishes. Parents don't understand their children's wishes, and children are anxious and easy to lose their temper.

4, the child's first "resistance period" appears, and it is easy to be grumpy.

How to educate a child with a big temper? First of all, we must find out the reason why the child's temper is getting worse, and then we can help him to correct it slowly. If your child keeps losing his temper with you, then you can let him try and hit the south wall hard. As long as he is hurt deeply enough, he will naturally know your good intentions, and it is inevitable to turn back.