Complications have occurred during pregnancy for four years, and now my daughter is over three years old. I have been working hard for my future career, accompanied by bouts of anxiety. Recently, I finally got a clue. I think I will sum up my attempts to find a career path in the past four years, divide it into several stages, and share it with full-time mothers who have the same troubles and don't know how to restart their careers.
After graduation internship, when my husband and I first moved to Rouen, I looked for a job for a while, but there was no marketing position for foreigners in that small city.
Later, I got pregnant and had complications during pregnancy. Looking for a job is completely put aside. This is how I spent my life during pregnancy, either resting at home or going to the hospital, worrying about the baby in my stomach every day. However, I still insisted on getting Dalf C 1 in the second trimester, which is a little psychological comfort.
Then my daughter gave birth prematurely, and I didn't care about anything else. I just take care of her every day, eat, drink and sleep, and do rehabilitation once or twice a week, so I spend a lot of time learning how to give her early education.
At that time, I started to write the official WeChat account, but I spent three days fishing and two days surfing the Internet. I admit that I have no other parenting blogger to spell.
At the same time, I began to learn to drive while my daughter was sleeping. At that time, my daughter always had to hug her when she slept during the day. I sat on the sofa with one hand holding her, put the computer on the table in front of me, and lit the mouse with the other hand to do the problem.
Later, my daughter was one year old and the situation was much better. All kinds of developmental delays caused by premature birth are gradually catching up. I moved my mind to find a job and began to inspect the surrounding nurseries. However, all the mothers who have applied for French nurseries know that it is impossible for us to apply for seats when we are six months pregnant.
Then, my husband graduated with a doctorate and got a job in the suburbs of Paris. Just as we were about to move, a private nursery near our home suddenly called and said there were seats available. I regretted it at that time and had to move to Paris to find it again.
After moving to Bali, let alone public nurseries and private nurseries, there is no chance at all. Knowing the situation, I began to look for Nounou. It was March, and there was no room for nounou near my home, so I had to book a nounou that would start in September, so I continued to look after my daughter full-time for half a year.
2065438+September 2007, my daughter began to take care of Nounou, three and a half days a week.
I remember the day when my daughter went through the adjustment period and lived in Nounou's house for the first time. I even think the air is full of "freedom". You know, this is the first time since my daughter was born 20 months ago that I haven't seen the children for a whole day.
I can finally have time to do my own thing. Finally, I can find a job with confidence.
However, reality began to slap me in the face, and finding a job became the source of my anxiety.
At this stage, I wrote in my previous article "Talk about the recent job search". Because there is a gap in resumes for more than two and a half years, most resumes have fallen into the sea. Several companies that got the interview didn't follow, because they doubted whether I could balance work and family.
Later, in order to add luster to my resume, I taught myself an online course in the direction of electronic marketing, which is relatively easy to find a job at home, but it still didn't improve.
Later, there was an airport job opportunity that had nothing to do with the major but was still interested, but the children could not arrange special working hours and had to give it up.
Only then did I know that I was so naive. I thought that even if I was vacant for two or three years, I would definitely find a job if I worked hard. But the state of looking for a job after having children is really different from that when there are no children.
In addition to the concerns of the recruitment company about my work and family harmony, I have to consider a lot myself. Because there is no one to look after the children, I can't work too far and always work overtime. My husband will be busy until late, and I can't stand to spend less time with my children. As we all know, the marketing work is busy, fast-paced, and there are many group work. Most of the marketing work related to the China market is in Little Paris.
Therefore, I have less and less hope of finding a job. I gradually accepted the reality that it is difficult for me to find a job related to my major or that I am interested in.
So I began to think, why do I have to find a job?
In order to have income, that's for sure. Not to mention to gain a sense of self-worth.
But there are too many ways to earn income and gain a sense of self-worth. Why do I have to find a job?
Because this is the safest way, because many business school students have done well in big companies before, I always feel why not. However, in my present situation, it is impossible.
And what is my ideal working condition? I think the most important thing is to work hard, but after school, I have to pick her up and give her the necessary company. I can go on working after she goes to bed. In other words, I work hard at work, but I need to be able to make time when my children need me.
And fixed working hours will never let me work in this ideal state.
Only freelancing or starting a business can meet my special needs for family time arrangement.
I registered my status as a micro-entrepreneur (original automobile entrepreneur) last year 10, and I intend to try to do some consulting on China market and online marketing, as well as translation of business documents.
Maybe others think my work experience is not enough, or maybe everyone likes to find a company to do similar consulting work. In short, I have not received any market consulting projects in China.
I took several translation jobs, such as translating menus, mobile phone applications, advertising soft texts and so on. But the salary is very low. I have to say that the vicious competition in the translation industry is really serious, and there will always be people who are cheaper than you. One month, I have two translation projects at the same time. After my daughter went to school four days a week, I worked as a translator at home until late at night, but I only earned less than 600 euros that month. I don't think this will work. On the one hand, the salary is low and limited, and the work is very tiring.
I'm confused again, but what can I do if I don't do this? ?
Like many people, I don't have any hobbies that can be turned into economic value except my major.
I have done several career tests online, and analyzed myself with various models, and analyzed my strengths, weaknesses, ideal values and so on. And ask myself over and over again what I really want to do, what is worthy of my full commitment and willing to start over completely? ?
After a period of searching, I have a clue: I have always been interested in psychology and have always been confused about myself and my family. After having children, I became interested in child psychology.
However, I inquired about the entrance requirements of French psychology major. It takes five years to study psychology from L 1 to France, and five years to study psychology from L 1 to M2***, and three years is eight years, and psychology is a major with high elimination rate and fierce competition. If you stay for another grade, it will take almost ten years.
Ten years, more than 30 years old. I really don't have the courage and conditions to do so.
Therefore, psychology can only be a hobby for me.
We can only keep looking for directions.
I even rummaged through the list of occupations in France, looking for a career that suits me, but searching aimlessly will only increase my confusion.
I gradually feel that instead of looking for it in the outside world in such confusion, it is better to seriously review my past experiences, cross my interests and see what I can find.
Later, I traveled around and tried to participate in several different types of studios, and my thinking gradually became clear.
My major is brand management. In fact, I have always had a dream, that is, to create my own products and brands. My undergraduate major in China is landscape design, and there are many courses about plants. Some time ago, I learned a lot about the emotional improvement of plant aromatherapy. As a result, the idea of starting a business is gradually clear: I want to be an indoor fragrance product of all-natural plants.
When we associate the messy past, the confused present and the desired future and think about them as a collation, we get a brand-new idea.
Of course, the most important thing is the courage to explore.
Although my entrepreneurial project is related to my past study, making indoor fragrance products is still a strange field for me. Even though I know a little about plant aromatherapy, it is a big challenge to make professional aromatherapy products.
I remember reading a survey before, but I forgot the specific figures. A large number of stay-at-home mothers turn to new fields to start over after working full-time. There are many successful cases, the most familiar ones are many parenting companies, and some mothers step into new fields after returning to school, or start new jobs from the bottom, and then counterattack.
It's not easy. Only by staying at home full-time for a long time can we realize how much these mothers will cherish such an opportunity to start over, even if it is hard.
Now my daughter has four days of classes a week, and I have arranged these four days to be full. I take online classes, studio classes, self-study classes, prepare for the establishment next fall, buy materials for experiments, and think about the operation mode ...?
However, there are always various chores delayed: trivial matters at home, complicated procedures in France, and my daughter's illness or holiday (for example, this past holiday, my daughter was sick one week before the holiday+two weeks before the holiday, and my daughter was at home for three weeks altogether), and things progressed very slowly.
As the old saying goes, mothers, including me, really have no choice, no helpers and can't afford to hire people to help. Many times, I have to make a choice. For me, family is more important, and my daughter is more important. Then, I can only try my best to optimize time allocation and improve efficiency.
In the preparation stage of starting a business, in addition to always feeling that time is not enough, there is another difficulty, that is, self-doubt: can I really do it?
There are so many things to learn, so complicated preparations to be made, and always doing it alone, and the profit seems to be far away. There is one final question. Can I do it?
I am the kind of person who thinks a lot, but I am a pessimistic actor. Even if my idea is negative, I will always try my best to do it.
So I later convinced myself that since I really wanted to do it and tried my best, that was enough. Everyone's life has a different rhythm, so just move forward step by step.
Entrepreneurship is not to force yourself, but to give yourself a chance. Do not forget your initiative mind, take your time.
I just started my business at this stage, so my writing is very limited. I will write slowly with the progress in the future.
These are the stages of my career search. In recent months, it took me four years to find the clue. It's slow, but it's worth it. Because I don't want to be the one pushed away by life forever, I always remind myself that you always have the right to choose.
Share it with all stay-at-home mothers, whether you are confused, have started over, or want to continue to be a stay-at-home mother. I wish you find what you want most and the option that suits you best.