What problems have been discussed so enthusiastically?
It is still the most discussed topic in the parenting world: Is it reliable for children to show the elderly?
Everyone has his own answer to this question, and the situation of each family is different, so it is difficult to say that there is a unified standard.
Say a few real people around me for reference.
When I took my daughter to an early education class, I met a little boy's grandmother, who was in the same class as my child.
The boy's nickname is Tang Tang. Tang Tang's grandmother used to work in a steel factory, but now she is retired. She came to Weihai from her hometown to help her daughter-in-law look after the children.
After chatting, I realized that her grandmother is omnipotent!
She did almost everything for her children. It goes without saying that she takes her children to early education classes and cooks and washes clothes during the day. Even Saturday and Sunday activities, such as picking strawberries and digging sand by the sea, are all things that she takes with her children.
Seeing our treasure moms talking about picture books, she asked me after listening: Is it a membership card?
I said, yes, I have the annual card of the library.
She asked again, how to do with the card, how much it costs a year, how to borrow the law and other questions, and I answered them one by one.
Finally, I suggested that she go to the photo library for a month for free, and then decide whether to apply for a card after reading the children's interests.
A few days later, she told me: I borrowed six books from the library. Every night, she reads picture books to her grandson. Children like them very much. She decided to apply for an annual card and asked me to recommend some good picture books to her.
I can't help but admire the old woman's action. She did it as soon as I told her. How many mothers can do it?
When we watched the children together, we also mentioned picture books to our mothers and even provided them with free experience cards. However, some of them have never used them once and don't even know them. They just said: My children don't like reading!
Imagine, such a grandmother and mother, who cares more about the children?
The child brought out by this grandmother is really good: the child is outgoing, lively and cheerful, a little naughty, but also very disciplined, and soon plays with other children and will take the initiative to share snacks.
Once I took my children to the square of the community to play, and I met a beautiful little girl who looked a little older than my children. There were not many children in the square that day, so my daughter wanted to play with the little girl and went to her side.
I asked her, how old are you, little friend? (I estimate about three years old)
She looked at me, then lowered her head and said nothing.
Ask her who she came with or not to talk.
The child stayed with her for a while, and may feel that she can't play together, so she ran to find other children to play.
I began to observe the little girl, and found that she was always alone, sitting there or sitting in another place, not talking to others, not playing with toys, and not running around like other children. She is as quiet as an adult, not like a child around three years old at all.
Later, it was discovered that her grandmother went out with the children. The child only goes to get a glass of water from his grandmother when he is thirsty. After drinking the water, he sits in a place by himself.
Her grandmother has been chatting with a group of old ladies. She didn't have any communication with the little girl all morning, and didn't call her home until she left at noon.
The little girl got up and followed her.
Later, I learned that the little girl's grandmother's brain is not very good.
No wonder children are like this.
The grandmother watched others talk all morning but didn't communicate with her children. Looking at the little girl's quiet appearance, I feel that she is not like a child, and it is distressing to be quiet.
When chatting with me, an elder sister who specializes in children's massage said that she could see from the children who went to massage her what kind of people were looking after them.
It's not that it's not reliable for the elderly to take care of their children, and not all mothers take care of their children seriously. Are there still few treasure moms who take care of their children while brushing WeChat?
However, many conservative old people still yell at their children in the way of the older generation.
Personally, I think who will take care of the children should be decided according to their family situation. After all, what kind of grandmother, what kind of grandmother, or you know best.
Childhood is not long, and it is gone forever. When children need love and care most, as long as there is love and methods, as long as they can grow up freely like children, whether they are raised by mothers or cared for by the elderly, I hope we can be gentle and give them the best quality companionship.
Finally, I ended up with a little poem that I like very much.
A child
? Hassan
A child,
If he
Clean,
Clothes and hats are neat,
If he
Behave yourself,
This is not a good thing.
If he talks,
It's just uncles and aunts.
Goodbye. Goodbye. Hello,
If he can make pears at the age of four,
What's the point?
It should be a child.
Rolling on the ground
Running around the street, my face and hands are dirty.
It should be a little bad and a little disobedient.
He should play games aimlessly for a long time,
He is a selfish, lovely,
Cruel little animals,
He came to this world to educate us,
So that we can grow again,
Not rot.
Qi Yue Mengshe article 10