Let children express their emotions by listening.
Of course, accidental injuries such as disasters will make the child feel that everything is out of control, and he may also become reckless and deliberately do things that are not allowed to be done in violation of principles. The reason why children are like this is just to verify whether things have really returned to normal as explained by adults through such behavior. Therefore, we must persist in some principled issues and cannot give up because the child is hurt. After all, these rules are also a part that he can rely on in his daily life. He tested his parents' reaction by destroying them to make sure that not everything would change because of accidents. If we stick to the principle, it will help him return to real life and bring him more sense of security.
For a younger child, he may suddenly become very dependent on his favorite things, such as one of his plush toys, small towels, blankets, handkerchiefs or other specific items. At this time, we should respect his needs. Because these familiar objects can give him a sense of security, give him more comfort, and increase his confidence in getting out of the psychological shadow brought by the disaster.
If a child's relative is killed by a disaster-
The experience of facing death is not all bad for children. In the experience of separation and sadness, children can learn to cherish their feelings and life. Human beings are born with the ability to heal psychological trauma. For example, human beings can vent their inner sadness through various behaviors, such as crying, telling, shouting, trembling, beating their chests and so on. Therefore, we don't need to stop, comfort or deceive this sad child who is experiencing death. As long as we stay with him, listen to his sadness and allow him to express his emotions in his own way, he will get out of the shadow of trauma under our protection.
For those young babies, we can hold him gently, cover him with a blanket, or let him hold a familiar soft object and tell his parents that he is safe. You can also instruct him to take a deep breath, gently press an object or distract him by clapping his hands and stamping his feet to help him relax. If the child is lost in thought and wandering, we can talk to him about some topics related to the surrounding environment and bring him back to real life, but don't rush to deny his unrealistic ideas, but give him some explanations and comfort after he settles down.
If the child becomes particularly timid after the disaster, no matter how to explain it to him, he is still afraid. It is best not to force him to get rid of this fear in a short time, otherwise he will hide some of his innermost thoughts in order to meet the expectations of his family, or express his fears in other inappropriate ways, and the result will be even worse. Therefore, we don't need to encourage him to face everything firmly, but to understand his emotions and find ways to help him release those bad emotions that are suppressed in his heart: "I know that you are afraid now ... It is normal to be afraid after such a thing. But all this has passed. Do you think about it? What can we do to make us not afraid? " In this way, children can be induced to find other ways to release their fears. Of course, if the child's fear seems particularly serious and there is no sign of relief, it is best to seek professional help.
If children are always immersed in the game of experiencing accidental injuries-
After experiencing accidental injuries, some children may deliberately touch things related to disasters, and these stimuli may cause secondary injuries to children. Therefore, in the first month after the disaster, it is best to try to avoid things related to the disaster, such as related TV programs, media reports or topic discussions.
Some children may be immersed in games related to disasters. At this time, we don't need to interfere with them deliberately. Many of his emotions will be released through games. If we can listen carefully while he is playing and give appropriate responses, he will help himself get rid of his fears in this way. Therefore, when a child plays games related to disasters, we don't need to rush to expect him to forget the painful experience, and we don't need to worry that he will continue to do so. When the child feels that he can be controlled, he will stop these activities on his own.
If the child has sleep problems—
Many children may have sleep problems after accidental injuries. Even if he has reached the age of independent sleep and is used to independent sleep, there may be some repeated behaviors, such as suddenly refusing to sleep alone, or sleeping very uneasily and afraid to sleep. When this happens to a child, we should accompany him as much as possible and provide him with some soothing measures, such as telling him stories, chatting with him about some relaxing things, opening a soft nightlight in his bedroom, and even considering sleeping with him. For older children, you can give him some necessary explanations. For younger children, we can hug him or pat him to give him enough comfort. At this time, we don't need to worry about spoiling the little guy. This situation will pass one day. Of course, if the child's sleep problem lasts for 6-8 weeks, it is best to ask a professional for help.
If the child's personality has changed significantly and degenerated-
First of all, we should realize that these depraved behaviors of children are only temporary and normal phenomena, and there is no need to suppress him or change him in a hurry. As long as we pay more attention to him and understand his behavior, the pressure inside the child will be weakened and will gradually return to normal. Secondly, we can help children to face these depraved behaviors correctly, and let him know that all this will pass through by explanation, so that he can learn to control himself.
No one expected that the disaster would happen in such a shocking way. It's useless to say anything, but we can certainly do something for the disaster area. In this blog post, I just want to talk about how to calm the baby's psychology after the disaster. I hope this article can bring some help to the parents in the disaster area!
Witnessing disasters, witnessing death, feeling pain and losing loved ones will bring extremely strong emotions such as fear, anxiety and sadness to children. For young children, although they are not familiar with the world, these experiences will also bring them deep harm. When they witness the death or injury of others or their relatives, they will worry that the injury and death will come again, that their other relatives will leave and that they will die. These horrible experiences may lead to children's anxiety, panic, nightmares, behavioral withdrawal and other behaviors, and even seriously affect his growth.
If you want to help children who have suffered psychological trauma recover, you must first understand the process of children's psychological recovery. This process is generally divided into three stages:
The first stage: after the disaster, children may go to two extremes. Some children become ruthless, especially obedient, and even give people the illusion of being very strong and smart. On the contrary, other children may become particularly vulnerable, showing that they are particularly fond of crying, noisy, clingy, often having nightmares and easily frightened.
The second stage: for a period of time after the accident, children may often have nightmares and become very irritable. They always like to talk about those horrible experiences and even repeat the plot of the accident while playing.
The third stage: the child is no longer entangled in the scene of disaster, and life is gradually regular and begins to return to normal. However, whenever he encounters the same scene, such as watching the same disaster happen in other places on TV, those horrible experiences in his memory may rise, and his traumatic experience will lead him to have nightmares or other abnormal behaviors again. Therefore, after the child returns to normal, we need to be vigilant and give him psychological counseling in due course.
Children will behave differently after a disaster. We can take different ways to deal with these manifestations and help him get out of the psychological shadow brought by the disaster.
If the child seems to be all right—
Some children are more clever than usual after an accidental injury, giving people the feeling that the accidental injury seems to have no effect on him. This does not mean that accidental injuries have no effect on him. There may be two reasons for this. First of all, he feels uncomfortable and has no energy to make noise. Second, he has a misunderstanding about the accident. If his parents or other caregivers give some wrong explanations for his "bad behavior", he may associate the disaster with his "bad behavior" and feel guilty. Although he can control his emotions during the day, at night, he may lose control, which is manifested in nightmares and midnight dreams. For such a child, the family must not be sloppy. They must carefully observe the child, pay more attention to give him more care and comfort, let him know that the disaster has nothing to do with him personally, and let him know that everything is over and the harm will not come again.
If the child is immersed in the panic caused by the disaster and cannot calm down-
If children often suddenly think of unexpected situations and are terrified, we can listen to him patiently and give him a chance to vent. When listening to him, we can neither exaggerate the fear brought by the disaster nor dissuade him. We should try to make him strong at once, or say too many words to comfort him, and try to give him a chance to express his inner fears, so that his condition will get better. However, if the child refuses to say it, we should not rush to let him express it and prepare him. Once he has the desire to talk, we can listen carefully.