First of all, we make sure that the couple's parenting direction is good. The child's age is just at the starting point of temperament and emotional extension, which means that orderly education will make him feel ashamed, while disorderly education will lead to children's psychological greed; At this time, the child's brain is just in the stage of rapid development, and his blind spot of thinking will determine his future personality through various perceptions. This kind of instant (on-the-spot) education for young couples focuses on making the child feel ashamed, disillusioning his bad desires, and gradually understanding what thoughts and behaviors are desirable and what thoughts and behaviors are not allowed. This kind of ideological education is particularly important for children's enlightenment, and it is urgent! Otherwise, after this stage, I found out that the child did whatever he wanted, and I was afraid that he could not fight back with a stick.
In the implementation of a series of family education, we should also see that when educating children, it is really necessary to divide occasions. Judging from the video, young couples are a little far away from their children, which will lead to negligence in safety. Once an accident happens, people and cars on the street will regret it for a lifetime, and it will not be worth the candle. So I personally think that educating children is a good thing, but not at the expense of safety. Besides, children can't cry for long. Frequent and repeated crying for a long time will cause health problems to children's body and mind. Typical cases will have an impact on the development of the child's reproductive organs and bladder, and will be swollen in severe cases, forming a popular saying of "gas-packed eggs". Therefore, when educating children, we should also learn to have common sense of parenting.
My humble opinion, welcome everyone to participate in the discussion.
After watching the video about the incident, I think there is obviously a problem with parents' attitude towards their children. Combined with relevant information, let me talk about my views:
I think children of different ages cry for different reasons. For those children under two or three years old, because of their poor language skills, in most cases, they cry for a reason. Because only crying can attract others' attention. They may cry because they are hungry, sleepy, tired, uncomfortable, or have peed in their diapers.
Judging from the video, the crying child is estimated to be about two years old. Children's expressive ability is extremely limited. If parents ignore their children's crying for a long time, it will only affect their physical and mental growth, and may even lead to changes in their personality.
Crowded people and cars coming and going on the main road may not only cause danger to children and cause safety accidents, but also pose a threat to their health.
If you meet someone who plays mobile phone while walking without careful observation, maybe the child may be trampled. The ground has been dissatisfied with dust and stains, and letting children cry can easily lead children to inhale dust and dirt, which will affect their health.
Therefore, from the perspective of children's health and safety, this practice of parents is also worthy of scrutiny.
For a child, if he really needs something, and his parents deliberately choose to look on coldly and fail to meet his needs, they still let him cry in the main road, so that passers-by are everywhere. Maybe he is not sensible, but I think he can feel that kind of ridicule and insult more or less.
For children, their needs have not been met, and they have experienced ridicule and insult, which is definitely a great blow to self-esteem. A child may not be able to convey his ideas accurately through language, but this feeling will be hidden in his heart.
On June 5438+February 65438+February 09, 2020, a video of "Meng Wa was crying on the ground while her parents watched calmly" was circulated on the Internet, which also caused a heated discussion among netizens. Some people agree with what parents do, while others disagree and criticize what parents do.
However, this video has no cause and effect. Why do parents make their children cry? What is the reason? I think only parents know, and it is a bit premature for netizens to comment or accuse their parents now.
This kind of thing happened to me once. Like the parents in the video, I silently watched the children cry.
When my daughter was about two years old, she sat on a rocking car in the nursery. On the way, another child came to line up. The rocking car stopped, and I communicated with my daughter. She didn't want the child to sit down, but another child couldn't wait to sit down. I told my daughter that she had finished sitting and there were people waiting in line. She will go up and sit down after others sit down.
Reluctantly, she came down. When the other child sat down and began to shake, she suddenly grabbed the cart, trying to pull the child down so as to stop it in time, otherwise both children might fall. Then, my daughter was unhappy and began to cry. I hugged her to comfort her and told her to wait a little longer before she could sit down.
I felt that she was a little relaxed, but when I wasn't looking, she went to pull the child in the car again, and I was a little angry. Then she fell on the ground and cried. I tried to pick her up, but I couldn't get her at all. The more I hug her, the more she plays. After several attempts, I gave up, just stood by and watched her cry, and told her that her mother was here to watch you cry, and you got up after crying.
Later, several people came to see her cry. Of course, someone asked me to pick her up. She found someone watching her, so she got up and hugged me. I also took the opportunity to reason with her and make her realize where she was wrong. Now the child is over 4 years old, and nothing has ever happened on the ground.
I often say that my daughter is a villain. Don't underestimate the children nowadays. They are too clever. You think they don't know anything, but they can read. For example, I have seen some children want to buy something. When parents don't buy it, they start splashing. Parents have no choice but to buy. Then after this success, the child will still use this method next time.
Usually, when a child has problems, one of the parents will always protect the child, but in the video, neither parent protects the child. Maybe the child is really unreasonable and won't communicate well. Children want to achieve the goal of compromise between parents in this way. Parents need determination and principles. As long as he fails, he will not use this trick next time.
When children are in a particularly bad mood, parents will actually be affected. Instead, they will treat it coldly. Both sides will calm down and let the children learn to control their emotions. Parents will also think about how to educate their children in the next step and then communicate. This will be effective communication.
I don't think the parents after 90 did anything wrong. When a child cries, his demands are often not met, so he will let his parents meet his demands by crying. Once you are satisfied, he will always use this method to force you to agree to his request.
If you don't agree, he will cry until you agree. The child is very clever. This is a habit they have developed since childhood. When children are young, they cry when they are hungry, but they don't cry when they are uncomfortable. But when they are two or three years old, they will start crying to get their parents to agree to anything he wants.
I have a personal experience of this. We are born after 80, and our second son is less than two years old. We can call simple words, such as dad, mom and grandma, but we can't say complete sentences. Once we took them out to play, he saw other people's children rolling on the ground, and then he learned.
Once my son wanted to have a snack before dinner. When he saw the snacks, I refused to give them to him. He began to roll on the ground and began to cry. My son didn't roll on the ground before. He just saw other children do this, and he did the same, forcing me to submit. My practice is the same as that of the post-90 s parents in the news, watching him roll.
After a while, when he saw that I ignored him, he got up by himself and stopped crying, as if he had forgotten about it, but I didn't see many tears on his face. I have observed many times that if a child doesn't give him anything, he starts to cry, and there are no tears at first.
In other words, the child is pretending to cry, and then making trouble with you, forcing the parents to agree to his request. Once you agree, he will continue to use this trick next time. The child's grandmother always hates the child crying, and will soon satisfy him, but I will not satisfy him. It depends on what it is, so it's no use crying to me.
Don't underestimate children aged 23 or 23. They really know everything. My 22-month-old son doesn't talk much, but he can generally understand what our adults say, and he really understands it. We were all surprised when I told my son that you were going to get something.
So I think the post-90s parents in the news did the right thing, that is, to use this method to get rid of their children's unreasonable demands. The child won't cry so much when he knows it's useless to make such a noise. It is useless to reason with their children, so they must be treated like this.
Let him cry on the ground. When he has enough troubles and finds that he can't reach his goal, he will understand that he can't do it a few more times and let him correct it. Nowadays, many children are spoiled. Parents should learn to refuse to meet all the demands of their children.
Of course, not all of them are rejected, but we can meet the reasonable demands of children. Unreasonable demands should be rejected, not blindly satisfied. Blindly satisfied will only teach spoiled wayward children, and appropriately refuse to let them know that some things can be done and some things can't be done, so I support parents born after 90.
I don't think anyone knows their children better than this couple. Who doesn't love their children and who doesn't care about their children. They must have done it for a reason. I guess in such an occasion and environment, the child's behavior may be threatening, unreasonable and moaning in the eyes of parents. Otherwise, how could his parents ignore his existence and performance in such an occasion and environment? There is a saying that "the authorities are fascinated. As the parents of children, they can best understand and understand why children behave like this on this occasion. They know this well (for example, maybe a family of three went to a toy store, and the child asked for a toy that he shouldn't buy because it was expensive, or maybe the child asked for a drink that he shouldn't drink at his age. Maybe he asked for a snack that he shouldn't eat at his age and so on. ) ..... In a word, in short, a child can't be spoiled from childhood, and nothing can follow his legitimate needs, and his parents can satisfy him. Parents should not indulge or spoil their children because of improper demands and unreasonable troubles. ...
After watching the video, my most intuitive feeling is that as parents, no matter how old they are, they all use the word' incompetence'. I have become a grandfather, and my little grandson is five years old. My wife and I helped our son and daughter-in-law bring up our little grandson, and now we are children in Class Two. First of all, as the saying goes, example is better than words. As for the young couple in the video, this kind of disciplining children, regardless of the occasion, is shameless and does not understand emotions. Children are children. What can parents leave behind? What kind of parents, what kind of family will produce what kind of children, passed down from generation to generation, so parents are children's teachers.
I think it's nothing! Everyone's education is different, there is nothing to say, but I still agree with their education, because I can't give my children an illusion that you don't give them anything I want, as long as they are lying on the ground, you will satisfy them, which has formed a habit. If they encounter difficulties, they will not be ideal, and they will not be forced, which will be detrimental to their future stepping into society.
On the contrary, I agree with some parents' handling behavior, such as why children refuse, which is very hard, but as long as children make trouble, they will be satisfied immediately, which is not good. As the first teacher of parents and children, we must adhere to this principle. It's no use crying if it doesn't work for a long time.
Friends, do you agree?
You have to know what happened before you can comment on right or wrong.
I feel that some netizens are a bit blx. My own child never helps him when he falls down. He can get up by himself. He never cries when he falls, so he can get up and continue playing. Think of those children who have parents to help them when they grow up. Sometimes too much doting will make children less strong.