When I first entered college, I kept the habit of high school. I listen carefully in every class and actively interact with the teacher if I have any questions. However, gradually, when I answer questions, there will always be harsh teasing laughter in the corner. I looked around at my classmates who were playing mobile phones, and I felt a different person standing.
Besides, people are lazy. Every time I go back to my dormitory and see my roommates watching dramas and playing games, I slowly begin to want to join them. So we played together in the dark, often playing in groups until 3 am, which led to the whole dormitory skipping classes the next day.
On a second-class exam, at the suggestion of my roommate, I played for the first time with luck? Cheat Sheet I was sitting in the front row on the edge of the classroom, looking at the black words on the test paper nervously, and my mind was blank. The sound of the wall clock ticking came from my ear, and the invigilator walked up and down the platform. My hand kept shaking and slowly slipped to the side of my pants pocket. While looking at the invigilator, I carefully took out the note, held it in my hand, and quickly pressed it behind the test paper. ....
I finally breathed a sigh of relief after the exam, and the invigilator asked me to stay; Come down and help him collect the test paper. When I folded the test paper and handed it to him, he counted the test numbers on the test paper and said to me without looking up, you go ahead and don't cheat next time. I froze in place, blushing with embarrassment. I subconsciously opened my mouth and wanted to say I was sorry, but I couldn't, and finally walked out of the classroom.
After returning to the dormitory, my roommate patted his legs and said with a loud smile that all the cheat sheets he played this time had been tested. Come on, let's turn on the black. As he spoke, two yellow front teeth were exposed. I looked at the scattered paper balls and cigarette butts beside his bed, and my ears echoed with what the invigilator said to me. I paused. I thought, is this my college life?
After the holiday, I went back to my hometown for the Spring Festival. My cousin is sitting on the sofa in the living room, chatting happily about taking the IELTS test. I saw them chatting happily and being curious for a while. What is IELTS first? They looked at each other awkwardly and turned to tell me that it was about studying abroad. Cousin pursed her lips, waved and added, I can't get in touch anyway. At that moment, embarrassment, inferiority, and a trace of anger came to mind. I tried to calm down and went to the bathroom. I looked at myself in the mirror and bit my teeth. I can't do this anymore.
By the beginning of next semester, I consciously keep myself busy. I found a part-time tutor online, 60 yuan every hour. Sometimes the classes are full, and I can earn more than 500 a week. The time in the dormitory is getting shorter and shorter, and the roommate is getting more and more alienated. Many times when I come back from class, the dormitory is full of people, but no one cares about me, so I habitually put on headphones and concentrate on preparing the lesson plan for the next day. Soon after, I moved out of the dormitory and rented a house outside the school. There were too many things on the day of moving. I ran back and forth to the dormitory many times by myself. I am so tired and sweaty, but I am also very happy, because I have taken the first step of change through hard work.
Later, the study Committee member of the class left, so I applied to the teacher for this position. I went to the undergraduate campus for a meeting, and the teachers and students there emphasized that "you junior college students should pay attention to your daily behavior and don't lose face in our college". Every time I listen to it, I feel very harsh, so I make up my mind to be admitted to a junior college.
So I quit my part-time job in my junior year and concentrated on preparing for the exam. In the early stage, words were mainly memorized, and the core words were memorized seven times with Ebbinghaus memory curve (later on "words without memorization"). It is not difficult to make a plan for yourself every day. I gained a sense of ritual in this process, which made me very satisfied.
What helps this sense of ceremony is reading a chapter of Dream of Red Mansions every night, or watching a movie every two weeks, and brushing American dramas while eating. At the end of the review, I worked out my daily routine in detail, starting at 7 o'clock and returning at 23 o'clock. I stayed in the library all the time except eating (I went to the "upgrade building" of the school when it closed during the holidays).
But a lot of good things wear people down, because my own resistance is poor, and I don't exercise much after sitting for a long time all day. During that time, I was accompanied by fever, fever, fever. Lymphadenitis and tonsillitis followed. At that time, when I was infusion in the school hospital, I asked my friend to move a table and put it beside my bed. I repeatedly asked the nurse to prick my left hand for fear of affecting my writing. Finally, I had seven holes in my left hand, and the nurse joked with me that it was almost a sieve ... In retrospect, that time was very painful, but it was also very fulfilling.
Finally admitted to a local key undergraduate course! ? When I got the admission notice, my heart was pounding and I almost screamed into the phone. Although I understand now that the results of my original efforts only touched their initial starting point, the efforts I have made along the way are also worthy of respect.
I recall growing up in the countryside with my grandmother when I was a child. Since the second day of junior high school, many students have dropped out of school early for various reasons to become apprentices and work. I was taken to the city by my parents. I was lucky enough to study for a few more years, and I gritted my teeth when everyone around me gave up. I understand that life is not a sprint, but a relay race. It is precisely because of this that I should keep running and catching up. How can you give up before the game is over? The terrible thing about hard work is that it can change your life bit by bit and make up for the gap between you and others.
Now, like my cousin four years ago, I am preparing for the study abroad exam.
I believe my efforts will not be disappointed.
Finally, I send you a word, I set it as a mobile phone screen saver to motivate myself:
"I have finished those beautiful battles, I have done my best in the right way, and I have always maintained the right way. Since then, the crown of justice has been reserved for me. " A Bible? 1 Timothy.
* * * Whatever you want.