Snail behind time
Because of my father, I entered the junior high school campus to study. Because of my stupid talent and lack of basic skills in all subjects, the class teacher expelled me from the campus before I finished studying for a semester. I was nineteen years old that year.
My self-esteem has been greatly affected. People call me a fool. I can bear it silently, but I can't face the feeling of being abandoned by everyone.
My parents are also worried about me, a slow child. My mother always said that I was a late bloomer in front of others. I know many people laugh at their mother's lies in the dark.
Father warmly invited a distant cousin of mine to my home again and again. He does technical work on the construction site. Thank you for your kindness and reluctantly agreed to take me out for a trip. My cousin and I boarded a bus bound for a big city and entered the years of working and wandering.
I work as a coolie on the construction site. The high courtyard wall is surrounded on all sides, which is the height I climb every day. The workmates laughed at me innocently. I was like a swinging swing, sucking the dark humiliation at night.
I came all the way from my hometown, and there is a creepy well in the city that I can jump into. During that bleak time, I fell in love with reading books and newspapers. In fact, I couldn't see books and newspapers at that time, just for shattered glass's vanity. This once again became the material that workers laughed at: "Even fools can read books and newspapers, which is really a big joke!"
The jokes of the workmates turned out to be an opportunity for me to break through the predicament: I must be able to read articles and write articles that belong to my life! So, I secretly bought a dictionary and got into the world of books and newspapers as soon as I was free.
Pupa can be freed from cocoon, and it has its own world for it to dance. The opportunity has finally come. Not far from the construction site, the library of a big company recruits a janitor, which costs only 600 yuan a month. For me, that library is too tempting for me. Those books are the best nourishment I am eager to read.
So I made a bold decision and went to work in that library without hesitation. I left the construction site firmly with simple luggage. I have always been defined as a coward and a clown, but refusing to play will pay a heavy price.
After I entered the library, I went to work every day to send and receive newspapers and magazines, organize books, and register to borrow and return books. Very relaxed and plenty of time. There are a large number of literary books in the library, and I greedily suck the fountain of spirit.
My meager salary is simply not enough to cover the living expenses in the city, so I am very hard on myself and scrimp and save. When leaving the construction site, my cousin threatened to come back as soon as you leave. Those few dollars can't cover your living expenses at all. My cousin's threat was shattered by my clenched teeth.
During my more than one year working in the library, I wrote more than 70 diaries.
Because of encephalitis sequela, I have been reading or writing for a long time. I have a bad headache like a chicken pecking rice, my ears are ringing like a hovering bomber, and my hands and feet are shaking uncontrollably. Every sentence in these diaries is an evergreen tree that I painstakingly watered, and a flower that blooms after my repeated painful baptism.
I insisted on writing, and my perseverance touched God, and one of my articles was finally finalized.
When cold comes and summer goes, flowers bloom and fall. I crawled like a tired snail and persisted. Although my writing style didn't become famous overnight like "super girl" and "fast man", it kept appearing in newspapers and periodicals.
As Bauhill Dale, an American blind writer, said, "In my heart, there has always been a fear of facing the darkness. In order to overcome it, I just live my life with a happy mood. " People with a heart will take root in their dreams in trivial time, seize the time to enrich themselves, climb to the top of the pyramid like snails, and have a persistent spirit and a spirit of never giving up to create opportunities in Vietnam.
Don't blame the reality, blame you for not being persistent enough.
It's really boring to travel far away and drive back and forth for more than ten hours. Just dig out some old movies to watch. In one breath, "You at the same table" and "In a hurry that year" are all very youthful stories. Two people who love each other very much thought that they would last forever, but in the end they broke up inexplicably. Movies push all these reasons into reality, and there is no way. Here's the reality. In the face of powerful reality, no matter how unshakable love is, it will become vulnerable.
This reason is so reasonable that people are speechless. Whether it is love or dreams, or everything else, when it is inexplicably lost, the phrase "this is the reality" will have a sympathetic explanation. Not only in movies, but also in life, such examples abound.
My friend is young. He drifted north alone after graduation. She is full of colorful imagination about the future. She wants to find a considerate, warm and loving man in that city with infinite possibilities, and rely on her intelligence and hard work to become a shining career goddess. Love has a double harvest, and such a life is what she pursues only if she is full of energy.
In that boundless city, she lives in the basement, can't see the sun all year round, works overtime until late at night, and dares not go home alone, so she will spend a night in the office. I have received a lot of supercilious look, a lot of criticism, being pushed out by my colleagues and being suppressed by my leaders. However, no matter how hard life is, every time I look at her, Weibo is full of fighting spirit. Like a soldier, she lives a hard and strong life in the city.
This little a is really likable. Whenever I have doubts about the future, I will look for motivation in her Weibo. I think a girl like her will realize her dream. Even if she can't, she has been on the road to her dream, and her life is full of hope.
But some time ago, Xiao suddenly stopped updating Weibo, and WeChat contacted her, only to know that she was getting married. Wow, has she finally found the man in her heart? I just opened my mouth to be happy for her, and the story behind immediately caught me off guard.
She said that the man she was going to marry was a middle-aged man. She doesn't love him, and he doesn't necessarily love her. She just feels that she is young and beautiful, and can fill the gaps in her life without losing face.
I was frightened. Why did you get married, since I don't love you? Why are you so wronged? Little boy, I can't help it. That is the reality. I really can't stand it alone. I want to find a shoulder to lean on. But nowadays, shoulders are so hard to find, let alone warmth and understanding that she loves her. Even a slightly decent man is a scarce thing. She has no money, no right, no house, no car, and she is not a goddess. There is really no advantage in the gender market. The demand for the other half has dropped again and again. In the end, everyone is willing to marry her.
After chatting with Xiao, I feel that I am not good. I am another person defeated by reality. Is reality really that terrible?
It seems terrible to think about it. For example, my friend Xiao V likes painting. When he was in college, he tried to contribute to magazines, and illustrations appeared in some magazines. This makes her dream expand like steamed bread soaked in water. In fact, her dream is very simple, that is, to become an illustrator, draw many beautiful illustrations, and earn enough money to live a good life for herself.
After graduation, everyone stood in the hot sun, with their sensitive noses up like dogs, looking for job opportunities everywhere, but she locked herself in a rented room and kept drawing. At that time, we all envied her, envied that she was working hard for her dream, and most of us didn't even know where to start. At least, she has a clear goal.
Those two years were really hard for her. The income from illustration is not enough to maintain her daily life. She often relies on her friends for help, so she has to hide it from her family. Every time she calls, she makes up a lie that she has beautiful scenery in the office building. She suffers from anxiety, insomnia, acne and hair loss, and at the same time she constantly wishes she had wings.
We all think that Xiao V who works so hard will definitely become an excellent illustrator. When she succeeds, maybe all of us will roll in the dust.
However, two years later, Xiao V suddenly announced that he would never paint again. This painting is not as beautiful as expected. The road is too difficult and full of thorns, which has stung her. She needs to live, she needs to earn money, and she needs to live a bright life, so she decided to go out to work and be a hardworking little white-collar worker. Although you can't make a fortune, you can at least be self-reliant.
We all sympathize with her, but she said that the reality is so cruel that dreams are not worth mentioning. In the face of powerful reality, all dreams seem childish and ridiculous.
However, is this really the case? Do we really have to bow our heads in front of reality and accept the fate of being defeated by reality?
I know some people, in the face of cruel reality, always stick to it, and then get a beautiful love and realize their original dreams. Just look at those successful people. Who hasn't been fascinated in reality? However, they got up after falling, and they never gave in to reality. Finally, they got everything they wanted.
Xiao Ya hastily entrusted herself to reality, but I know that Zhou Chong, a writer, has fallen a lot in reality. In her thirties, she finally waited for a man who understood that she loved her and was willing to set her free. Xiao V put her dream aside in the face of reality, but I know that April, an illustrator, once locked herself in a rental house, thinking that she would not live like an ascetic, but she refused to give up and finally let her dream shine.
No matter how cruel the reality is, there are always some people who will stick to it. Whether it is love or dreams, or everything else, as long as you persist, you can keep loneliness and endure loneliness. If you hold your head proudly in front of life, you will find that reality is a bully. If you flinch in front of it, it will always force you to flinch. If you go forward, it can't take you away.
Really don't use reality as an excuse. Everything that is defeated by reality is because you are not persistent enough.
Don't hit the south wall, don't get ahead.
Many people are not optimistic about the road. If you leave, there will never be peace. Among the spittle that is enough to drown you, there is a sentence called "hit the south wall and don't look back."
This wall is terrible. Although invisible, too many people are afraid of its power, so they quickly take back the steps they have just taken, or turn back halfway.
Therefore, too many people dream of the world outside the wall all their lives, content with the status quo and hoping for the unknown.
In fact, the wall is man-made. How can we control people? Even if you really hit a wall, turn around, perhaps because there is nothing you must have outside the wall.
A strong heart is invincible. If you really want to have a goal, no matter how difficult and dangerous it is, you can't end the dream catcher's belief.
Yugong continued to dig mountains, and Tang Xuanzang continued westward. How much did he suffer? But after all, the dream has come true. If Zhisou's ridicule and the devil's persecution are really walls, I'm afraid they are iron walls, and they have not changed this ancient and weak iron will.
Edison looked for the filament, and Madame Curie discovered radium. The number of failures is thousands. Every time I fail, the wall will thicken a little. How strong will it be if I come down a thousand times? Was it not destroyed by a weak body with indomitable belief?
Or the great man put it well: nothing is difficult in the world, I'm afraid there is a will.
Unfortunately, such a man of heart was once ridiculed as reckless and ignorant.
Looking ahead in the name of rationality and calculating the consequences under the guise of shrewdness is the way for people who are afraid of being far away. Safety is safe, but life is only faint.
Without the pain of hitting the south wall, there is no fun to move forward; No blood, no blood from now on.
They don't know: hitting the south wall hurts for a while, but not hitting the south wall hurts for a lifetime.
Looking back, I am afraid of hitting the wall. To put it bluntly, I am a coward and dare not struggle in life. It is meaningless to live to 100.
The south wall in the shape of * * * will only delay the time to reach the distant place in front of the strong, and will not change the result of reaching the destination. The wall is not as strong as expected. If you hit it several times, it will fall down.
Fairy wisdom gives birth to a cliff. How can we get it safely? The pearl is deep in the sea, and foreigners sigh.
Being safe and sound, getting ahead is never easy!