Three years ago, I was a new mother, and my initial joy and emotion were quickly overwhelmed by helplessness and anxiety. I know that negative emotions and state will inevitably affect my quality as a mother, and an instinctive growth force makes me naturally think of asking for help from books.
These books on baby rearing, children's psychological behavior and parent-child communication have given me professional parenting knowledge and helped me to constantly think about how to love children and how to get along with them. Reading these books doesn't make me the best mother, but I must be a very bad mother if I don't read these books. Today's recommendation, I hope to help everyone who trudges on the road of parenting.
1
Learn parenting from American pediatricians
Author: big J.
Press: China Women's Publishing House
Publication year: 20 18 1 month.
Pricing: 48 yuan
ISBN: 97875 127 13628
Recommended reading: parents of 0- 1 year-old baby
When my son was less than a month old, he was admitted to NICU (Neonatal Intensive Care Unit) because of umbilical cord infection and eczema. I can only go to the hospital to see him twice a week. Although the child is in stable condition in the hospital, I am still worried and pessimistic. And Xiao D, the daughter of Da J, the author of Learning from American Pediatricians, also had the experience of living in NICU because of premature birth, and the situation of Xiao D was even more serious. However, the author J did not give up, but resigned and became a full-time mother, constantly learning parenting knowledge and accompanying her daughter to grow up all the way. Such mentality and behavior inspire my mood.
The record and sharing of big J parenting practice opened a door for me to learn parenting knowledge. The book involves many practical problems that novice parents will encounter: how much is appropriate for their babies? Do you want to shit the baby? How to shape a beautiful head shape for your baby? Now it seems that if we can finish reading this book before the baby is born, then the days after the baby is born will not always be full of troubles.
2
The sensitive period of catching children
Author: Sun Ruixue
Press: China Women's Publishing House
Publication year: 20 17 12.
Pricing: 38 yuan
ISBN:97875 12705739
Recommended reading: Parents of children aged 0-6
I had heard of Montessori before I became a mother, but I knew nothing about it. It is by grasping the sensitive period of children that this book slowly enters the world of Montessori education. The author Sun Ruixue is a pioneer in the popularization and practice of Montessori education in China.
Children aged 0-6 gradually understand the environment and develop themselves in one sensitive period after another. Some children's behaviors are so unreasonable or even incredible from the traditional or public point of view, but these behaviors can be understood at once with the sensitive period theory. For example, babies eat their hands, and adults always say it's unsanitary, so stop it immediately. As everyone knows, this is a child's mouth to "wake up other parts of the body and use it to understand the outside world." This is the essence behind the baby's eating behavior and needs to be respected. Adults can help your baby keep his hands clean and let him pass the "oral sensitive period" smoothly. There are detailed case studies and theoretical interpretations for each sensitive period in the book.
When reading this book, we can deeply feel the author's deep understanding and concern about children's behavior and psychology. As the title page of the book says: this is a book that loves children, not a book that teaches children.
three
Raise a boy
Author: Steve Biderf
Translator: Feng et al.
Publishing House: CITIC Publishing House
Publication year: 2065438+June 2008
Pricing: 32 yuan
ISBN:9787508644868
Recommended reading: 1~ 18 for parents of boys.
I bought and watched Raising Boys and the corresponding Raising Girls. Raising Boys first enriches our understanding of boys from physiology and brain structure, and reveals the influence of testosterone on boys' personality and behavior and the differences between boys and girls in brain structure.
Knowing this can help the parents of boys look at and treat boys more objectively. In the process of the boy's growth, how the father and mother influenced the boy, the book tells a chapter respectively. With the opening of society, sex education is very important for both boys and girls. This book also has a chapter devoted to this issue and introduces the relationship between sports and boys' growth.
This book is very popular in both content and language, and can bring targeted inspiration to parents with sons.
four
Positive discipline
Author: jane nelsen
Translator: Yu Bing
Press: Beijing United Press
Publication year: 2065438+September 2009
Pricing: 38 yuan
ISBN:97875502685 17
Recommended reading: Parents who want to live in harmony with their children.
As children gradually learn to walk and talk, their self-awareness develops rapidly and becomes a little guy who "opposes" their parents all the time. Sometimes parents lose control and beat and scold their children. The reason is that we adults can't judge and understand the psychological motivation behind children's disobedience, uncooperative and bad behavior. The book Active Discipline reveals four psychological motivations behind children's bad behavior and their coping styles. The concepts of "children need encouragement, just like plants need water" and "winning children, not winning them" put forward in the book are the core of positive discipline.
When the author jane nelsen was a mother of five children, she didn't know how to make the children stop fighting, put away their toys and do the housework they promised to do ... These problems made her depressed. Threats, shouts and beatings disgusted her, and so did the children. Later, she used Adler's method (the theoretical basis of positive discipline) to feel the joy of being a mother more and more. When you want to yell at children more and more, and immediately regret yelling at children occasionally, you can read this book more, and different perspectives and methods will pop up in your mind. This is probably the advantage of reading parenting books.
five
Page (abbreviation of page) parental efficacy training
Author: Thomas Gordon
Translator: Joan Lin
Press: China Development Press.
Publication year: 2065438+June 2009
Pricing: 35 yuan
ISBN:97875 17703822
Recommended reading: Parents who want to improve the quality of parent-child communication.
Where there is interpersonal communication, there may be interpersonal conflict. This is especially true when parents get along with their children. Good conflict handling can establish a harmonious parent-child relationship and create a healthy family atmosphere. Otherwise, all parenting methods and skills will be difficult to work. The book "P.E.T Parental Effectiveness Training" aims to provide parents with ideas and methods for training how to communicate with their children peacefully and effectively.
The popular saying "Xiong Haizi has parents behind him" is supported by facts, but it also wronged many parents. It's not that I don't want to educate my children well, but that I don't know how to face the conflict with my children and lack scientific methods to deal with it. Parents are flesh and blood, and so are children. This book shows parents' understanding. It not only points out that "parents are human beings, not gods", but also points out that "real parents can sometimes accept some behaviors of their children, but sometimes they can't". Moreover, it is also a fact that the same behavior was acceptable before and is unacceptable now. These views are both practical and humane. When I read these chapters, I gradually realized that part of the anxiety of parenting comes from the mentality of pursuing perfection too much.
When the child's behavior only resists meeting his own needs, it is the child's ownership. When a child's behavior annoys his parents, it is the problem of parents' ownership. The former is suitable for communicating with "your information" and the latter is suitable for communicating with "my information", which is the focus of the later chapters of this book. The communication methods mentioned in the book can be extended to other relationships, which will help improve self-awareness and the effectiveness of expression in interpersonal relationships.
-The end-